Subj: FLIM FLAM MCSHAM and his Marvellous Machine
Date: 5/22/2003 12:12:29 AM Eastern Daylight Time
From: [email protected]don' (Peterborough of Escottshire) To: [email protected] (dork)

Gosh dern splendid article of yours, there. I could say the same about all of 'em, but this time I've actually got something to contribute, regardless of whether or not it's welcome. You see, as a youngster, I was rather heavily exposed to the cartoon in question (woh-oh, woh-oh, Widget the World-Watcher, repeat as necessary), and I can offer some little-needed insight into many of the game's mysteries. For example!

* Six table tennis balls, an upside-down tupperware container, two gloves, and a smiling Comedy Sensation combine to create the one they, and therefore we, call Megabrain. Megabrain lives in Widget's wristwatch, and will gladly leave Widget alone until he presumably presses one of the buttons that *doesn't* set the alarm or change from twelve-hour to twenty-four-hour time, at which point Megabrain will explode out of the watch in a flurry of early-nineties Korean special effects and mumble loudly. He's more or less useless, except as all-important comic relief to complement Widget's unerring straight man.

* Ratchet is Widget's evil clone, created by - yes, you guessed it, Mister Psychic - Megabrain. It was obviously decided early on that Widget needed a recurring villain for his life as a World-Watcher to have any real purpose, so one day, while cleaning the frighteningly hospitable cave in which he lives, Widget complained to Megabrain, via the usual channels, that he was overworked. Megabrain took this as a cleverly-disguised command to clone him as he slept, but Something Went Wrong, as it usually does, and the clone was born pink, deformed, evil, and with the foresight to run out of the cave within seconds of being born fully-sized and naming himself Ratchet. Megabrain's responsibility for this abomination is never mentioned again.

* The perpetually petrified blue mongrel is Half-Pint, Widget's younger...cousin, I think. He's small and he's scared of everything. Just as useless as Megabrain, just as biologically similar to Widget as Ratchet, just as blue as a Tasmanian nudist in the winter.

* Brian is Widget's human friend. Because every alien needs a human friend, and Brian's terribly influental in human society, as I'm sure you can imagine. Is on speaking terms with Megabrain. Has an older sister, if I remember correctly. Told Widget in the very first episode to turn into a boxer. Widget, naturally, responded by turning into the breed of dog that just happens to be called a boxer! Coughs all 'round.

* Widget, and any visitors to his cave, would often be seen playing a heavily pixellated video game called Bouncing Bob. In it, the title character smiles inanely as he bounces left and right on a rocky, craterful planet, bouncing on top of monsters of some sort whenever possible. Bouncing Bob was usually only ever played in the first and/or last scene of any particular episode, either to demonstrate that everything is normal, or that everything has gone back to normal. Although I have a sneaking suspicion that it was used as a plot point at least once, like Widget having a game of Bouncing Bob against that episode's villain, with the winner somehow winning the conflict of good vs. evil. My point is that it's a far better game than the one they ended up making based on Widget, as I'm sure you'll agree.

That was more than you needed to know. Hell, that was more than I needed to know. Just be thankful I didn't tell you anything about Superted. I *could*, mind you.

Uku the Pot-Watcher (interpret that how you will)