The Glade smell paint people, including the lunatic seen here, are incredibly proud of a trinket they sell which smells so much like real pumpking pie. 'ey! I don't want to smell pumpkin pie unless there is pie. GLADE. That's false advertising. That would be the culinary equivelant of men stuffing socks in the fronts of their trouseral garments if I considered that an aid to one's overall appearance. This still isn't as despicable as what the airwick people are doing. What with their creepy, inaccurate animals. Yes, you. They must take great pride in their crapft, however, as this creepy lizard was recalled and replaced with another creepy lizard (but who had the same voice). It wasn't much of an improvement, but at least they tried to improve. The least is often the most I bother hoping for. I think someone must have sent Airwick a letter protesting, if not the general, exceptional horridness, merely certain technical aspects. While both look like frogs, the first looked more like a fish than a frog, and frogs look more like chameleons than fish, and they both identify themselves as chameleons. Because Airwick does strive for biological accuracy in its awful ads. Like the one where the octopus has adequate tentacle mass to manipulate objects and support its huge, frontally mouthed head in terrestrial gravity. Or how about the giraffe that has pig children? (the answer: no!) I'm additionally put off that the bad animals are depicted as having the same subservient housekeeping women stereotypes as humans are. That is, I assume they're supposed to be women by them wearing high-heeled shoes and having big eyelashes, bloated chests and lips at all, let alone bright bloody red ones, but I don't know why I do since those have no logical place on animals. Or even humans, oftentimes. But the ah organisms are always vacuuming or picking up clothing. And they don't even wear clothing. The creepy lizard informs its spawn that the time is for dinner, despite having spent the past twenty seconds compulsively adjusting picture frames and in or near a purple chair within no proximity to food, telling me about air freshener. Either the "dinner" "plot" "point" was taped on at the end toward the end of production because the thing didn't seem subservient enough or it is seriously slacking off in its domestic duties. Hey! This food is cold! Get back in the kitchen! Make me new meat! Don't you be changin' colors, tryin' to hide from me! Ah kin smell ya! I guess when your target customers are single mothers whose ideal pastime is putting on whore makeup and then sitting around smelling little plastic bottles, dreaming of better times which will never come, you have to assume their existences are otherwise joyless. How this repugnant reptile attaches giant plastic eyelashes with those tiny little arms is surely another unfixable life aspect in need of a mental escape from. "Airwick! For when you airwishk you were dead!" If crystal methf was legal, these people would be selling it. As things are we'll have to settle for distilling ingredients from it. I actually listened to a product description for the first time, just because I'm that dedicated to complaining about this, and supposedly these "hidden pleasures" are special because they doesn't look like air fresheners and that's good because you shouldn't want people to know you use them. Although I say if you're so concerned about the stench of your human-centric home, you should stop loafing about naked all the time. The drunk rabbit is newest. Sometimes "hidden pleasures" aren't enough to make them forget, it seems. Do observe the dark smoke coming forth from the toast-machine in the other room. Isn't it great that we don't have to smell fire hazards in our home anymore? It's much easier to mask the stench of smoke than do something about it. It will still make you cough uncontrollably and eventually burn your house down, but meh. You'll deal with that later. On its own, I rate the rabbit's awfulness somewhere between the giraffe's and the elephant's. In a real world context, however, it is far worse. Could this please not happen? Maybe you can't control what gets you up and off, but you certainly don't have to announce it to me. And if that's also part if it for you, you could do it less sleazily. But you don't. Ever. Ehhhanyway... Like most things to do with animation, the airwickery is worst in England. For somebody who's only ever passed by farms in the distance, I have seen far, far too many udders in my life. How are those any less bad than the human equivalent? Why can't these things get blurred up? I'd draw attention to a truly ridiculous character scale issue, but that implies several things which I do not wish to: That the left character resembles a butterfly in any aspect other than wings, that being a butterfly it could fly without de-facto lynching itself, and that I should expect the creatures to be proportioned realistically in a context where everything else is ridiculous. I don't complain about the chairs, for example, even though having such large things coming out of your neck would prevent using any furniture with back support. My awareness of these things, by the wer, also explains the frequently sparse backgrounds in my own pictures. I don't want to put something there if it shouldn't be there. In contrast, everything here shouldn't be here. Even here shouldn't be here. However, I do find the British dub slightly less grating than the "sultry" one we get here. They're selling smell paint, after all, and not to [heterosexual] men. Also, while perhaps a tad pretentious, "scented oil" is more honest a description than "air freshener." I still prefer "smell paint." Why am I so bothered? There have certainly been feature films made with uglier characters who talk more and have even less reason to exist. And these ads are from just one company at work. All these things, I suppose they could be worse. But I'd rather not think about- There, see? I don't even know what this thing is selling. I've only seen it once, and in my shocked state I did not retain enough senses to take a picture of the screen as proof that this happened –a priority– and listen to the monster's marketing schpiel –not a priority–. What I do know is that the unsane vulpes wants me to go to a website whose name starts with a number, always a sign of professionalism and longterm accountability. As is "crazy." Whatever the product or service is, it must work because that computer screen says "SUCCESS" on it. Why would that yerfy yahoo break into someone's office, probably eating* the owner at some point, and type SUCCESS in a big font without having succeeded at something? Or ever? *did you know that's a fetish too? I [wish I] didn't. At any rate, we're all done here. Or I certainly am. You can stay as long as you like. I shall not return.