drawings and such stupid comics and whatnot

May 25, 2015
In another popular video, Thriller, the performer is seen to transform first into a “cat person,” then a dancing “monster.”

This plant-like-organism seems first enthusiastic and then disapproving about something. Whatever that is seems to have not been fully drawn yet.

May 19, 2015
At the very end of the video, he comes of his rabbit costume, only to have the rabbit come to life and challenge him to a dance-off.

page 7 of part 3 of this questionable comicoid.
I like that the lizard’s nose is a different shape in every frame. At this point the comic primarily exists for me to laugh at that creature.
The last frame probably has too many actions for one frame but i think the order is apparent eventually.
I decided somebody should actually hold the shopping bag by its handles once before it passes from relevance, to justify drawing them all this time. I would like you to think I deliberately avoided using them as some subtle commentary on how dumb these imps are but I do not think that far ahead.
Inconsistencies between here and the last time I showed this apartment are merely my own lack of effort and not deliberate evidence of in-story subterfuge.

May 17, 2015
Judge Pastor also dropped the other contempt charge which stemmed from an online report that quoted White allegedly calling prosecution anesthesiology expert Dr. Steven Shafer “a scumbag.”

page 37 of redraw comic pages, because I am determined to give illogical external guilt priority over all things, but there should be a new non-old page before [specific period of time].
I was dwelling on what to replace the zelda screenshots with, because I did not for the time being have the patience to construct a series of fake nes screenshots that look like a real ones when reduced for a gag that almost nobody would notice, but since these were just mouse-drawn impressions to begin with, and have now been vectorized and re-rasterized, it would be impossible to prove that any intellectual property is being violated here; only imitated. The full-on one on the previous page was legitimate so I replaced it with a scene from a super mario world rom-hack I was involved with which, as per my usual contract, was never finished, though the level I contributed graphics to was.

By the wuh: there is somebody else who hassles me for still playing the game Doom and designing little add-ons for my personal amusement instead of starting a new game in a free 3d development system like Unity for big buck$ because Doom is an outmoded “hipster luddite” gaming engine that is deliberately hard to work with. But compared to Super Mario World, Doom editing is like eating an ice cream sandwich, and mario is one of the easier ones. I find the frightful hellish experience of 21 years ago rather relaxing at this point, and I use it as relief for other annoying obligations rather than to make it an obligation in itself. I do it while listening to classical music. In fact I do not often like classical music in other contexts. Also, the person I did the mario thing with is one of my more trusted acquaintances so this should not be taken as hostility about that either. But rom-hacking is miserable work that gives very little to show for your effort.

And for those following the brief sniplets of my personal non-internet soap stopera, the performance I believed I would be doing the next day last time did not occur because the show ran long due to “technical difficulties.” I cannot now commit to doing it at the next show because I may be kidnapped by skeletons next week.

Anyway, what is important is that asking me to do anything means it will never get done to anyone’s satisfaction and everyone will be very angry afterward.

May 12, 2015
because a slapstick love will make you smile

May 11 was once again bimshwel’s birthday. That is somewhat confusing since I have lately taken to allowing myself to be called bimshwel, and that is not my birth-day. I sold mine to cover ransom expenses. However, it was very close to mother’s day, and I am like this website’s mother. It gave me no honor on my day, and when I waited for its day, I decided it should also wait, hence a post on May 12. But then I could not find the pictures I needed, so I pushed it back to May 13. However, on May 13 I need to issue an education presentation on the subject of dopes at the debut of the world famous “Jess and Ian Show” (featuring Ian of Joey and Ian: Gettin’ Dead fame) in New Haven, so I brought this post back to May 12. All this time travel is wearing me out.

Legally, the website is thirteen years old. I remember when I turned 13, in 1996. The nintendo 64 ehhhntertainment system was just being released, and I became almost instantly disillusioned with and bored by 3d, and it never let up in the years since, thereby thoroughly cutting me off from about the only interest I up to that point shared with people my own age, concurrent with video games becoming the PRIMARY bonding medium for those people. And they act as if video games prior to the point when I started hating exist only as meritless kitsch to use in obnoxious breakfast cereal advertisements. I took a picture of some tacky “retro” pixel art being used to sell some surely appetizing packaged ingredient formation in a 7-11 a year ago and just now spent an hour searching for it, with no results. What misery! How could you treat your own mother like that! I would send you to your room, but I decided being vicariously lived-through by an abusive parent is punishment enough.

May 8, 2015
One last move: 5 steps to take down an attacker

Step Bother

A surprising number of my picture ideas seem to involve stairs.
Why does nemitz look at ME at the end? Why does it try and put responsibility on me for mitz mitztakes? I am half-convinced nemitz did this on purpose to try and get sympathy out of me. Know this: none is forthcoming! I have a good mind to kick nemitz out of the house, but its willful incompetence has deprived me of the right.

May 2, 2015
this mother’s day, share with us how your mom rocks

I will be attempting to sell art at the Connecticut Walk for Autism on Sunday. Autism is apparently big business. So much so that it needs us to walk so we can raise money for more autism with which to generate more business.
Ideally, my presence will repel folk with such force as to make the event a Run, therefore raising more money.

But I am kidding; in fact my wares do quite well among people with diagnosed mental disorders. I have one so I can say that, and can disclaim responsibility if told I cannot. It is called a “autism spectrum.” I am not entirely sure what that means, but it sounds fancy. Somebody asked me what my spectrum was and I replied “the visible spectrum.” I do not always know if anyone else knows what I am talking about, but I am pretty sure they can see me. And if they cannot, that is my chance to escape.

April 29, 2015
synchronized swimming at its most deadly

Now you are just being gross.

I wish “breakfast just got sexier” was the stupidest thing I ever heard in a Dunkin Donuts advertisement, but it is hard to beat “artisan bagel.” Or “doing things is what we like to do.”

on the topic of doughnuts, with cookie dough and brownie batter around, why are you making doughnuts? It seems like you are half way to making two better things.

Just because these are limited edition doughnuts does NOT mean we are running out of doughnuts!

Also, my spellchecking mechanism recognizes donuts but not doughnuts.

The advertisement was audible again while I was writing this, because I am not allowed to write without voices coming at me incessantly, and apparently the announcer is saying “breakfast just got zestier.”

Which means they are chopping up little bits of zest brand soap into the Ore Ida tater tots they call hash browns, trying to outdo Taco Bell’s Dorito taco. In which event I still will not eat it but will be just as perturbed and curious.
An alternate, more common interpretation of “zestier” is as a code word for “we got more salt in there.” I am impressed it was possible but otherwise uninterested. Even though the product features guacamole made with REAL avacadoes! Because I am supposed to be impressed that a company which has earned trillions of dollars selling food made food properly. Don’t you people who have been eating the fake stuff feel silly now! No, that is probably not something that you feel. Soon the Apple company will be boasting that if you order an ipad the box won’t be full of strawberry jam.

The fact that, even as a eunuch, I heard “sexier” and found it only mildly surprising for our current state of advertising suggests that a sexier breakfast may not in fact be far off.

I mean, assuming that is possible. We might not even need to get an artist to draw big eyelashes and high heeled shoes on this munchstrosity.

April 24, 2015
he was often beaten by Harlequin for his boasting and cowardice.

page 36 of the old part 1 of that? Yes.
Even when I reused the old drawing this took a week. It looks as if every one of these pages will need to be significantly overhauled before I may rest. I will be remaking broken trash until I die. Just like Lunar Silver Star Story, a 1997 Playstation remake of a 1992 Sega CD game, that has since been repolished and repackaged as a new game two or more times, (like what Capcom did with Street Fighter 2 stretched across two decades instead of two years), except without anime to distract people from the lack of improvements over plainly dated content. And also I do it alone for free, at nobody’s insistence but my own. But I think this is superior to before.

that makes me feel better!

April 20, 2015
When I’m done riding buckin’ horses my day job begins

There was a period, I am uncertain how long, when I understood a condom to be a heavy, plastic box-like object. This followed the period when I did not understand a condom to be different from a condo, and I misunderstood several mad magazine gags as a result.
The imagined object was transparent at the sides, but the edges were thick and black in color. I knew one was used during sex acts but was not certain how it worked. I reckoned it was uncomfortable. Seeing the word still brings to my mind the same imagery, occasionally. I have even seen a real one in person, though I have never knowingly touched one. They look unpleasant. The same applies to walruses.

April 15, 2015
Charlie Sheen as Dex Dogtective,[8] a anthromorphic dog private investigator,[5]

a potential design for new potential business cards. Alas, I know nothing of business, and my card attempts reflect that. I subconsciously channeled this ancient, totally unusable design:

Both are way too busy but they are at least honest. If I delivered a simple, efficient, graphic designy card it would be a lie because that is not the sort of product I produce. I was hoping the old card design would be conspicuously less legible by comparison to the new one when reduced, but alas they are about the same! I never used it as a card, but I did expand it vertically to use as a sign at some event about which there is little positive to say. volcabbage@mailbolt.com is the same email address I had then; anything @bimshwel.com gets forwarded to me but I have difficulty deciding on what placebo username@bimshwel.com to give myself.

This one is from 2011, long enough ago that I thought inkbunny would ultimately be something I could admit to having an account on, and was willing to put money behind promoting my use of. If you are unfamiliar with Inkbunny, good. All you need to know is that it does not allow Toothcup.

That it does not allow Toothcup, capital T, that is actually one of the things it has going for it, and that many of the people you will deal with wish that were not the case. If you do not know what toothcup is, good. All you need to know is less than I already told you.

These days I will not put any of them on my card, which is in fact the very reason I chose horrible “names” like “queg” and “skrimpf” to begin with: so that nobody could connect them to my legal horrible name. I chose queg so nobody would know I had a deviantart account, and then I chose skrimpf so nobody would know queg was using furfaninity. I chose frubaklop because I had lost control of my life and figured there was no sense in hiding anymore.

For a brief, notorious period, and it must have been brief because it looks as if even at the time I was uncertain whether I should keep the website names vague so as to avoid outing myself all needless-like, I thought I was comfortable, and I cursed myself for choosing names nobody would ever look for me at, and now I am grateful again. This is my place and these are my people so I should not deny it, I seem to have thought. Those are not my places. I mention them here specifically because I thought it would be sufficient to stop using those names and websites to make people stop identifying me with them, which was not the case so I will say it here: please do not ever call me skrimpf, unless you are deliberately trying to irritate me, which is a valid pursuit, but better you do it on purpose than by mistake. I do have http://bimshwel.deviantart.com/ , which queg forwards to, but “DA” is still fundamentally a fanart porn site, like the other two, that I will always be marginalized on [for not drawing or appreciating fanart porn], and I prefer to be marginalized on my own terms. However, such websites are a bit more social than my heap, here, so I keep on with the one I am least embarrassed about overall.

At this point in the original manuscript I digressed into several paragraphs on identity and denial that were beside the point and tone, and were keeping me from finishing this, even though I only came to post the one picture! They have been removed for now. Indeed I am as messed up inside up as my card is outside. Why pretend? Why try and trick somebody into hiring me based on something that is uncharacteristic of what I can deliver?

Because otherwise I will not be hired! The first cards I actually had printed were very sparse, since that was, is the only way I could have control of the situation.

Control, such as with my broken, spring-based mechanical heating control panel, which these cards were useful for regulating the strength of during our six months of winter. I discussed a key design aspect in more detail here, but the blank space after “and” was so I could write something different on each card, such as “intrepid tortellini,” “raisin toads,” or “no dopes,” because I am not satisfied unless I make a hassle out of everything. The foremost one here says “you know what, you deserve it.” I can say that because you are here now, and therefore on some level you do.

Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database

them`s fightin` woids: May 26, 2015
PurpleSpace sez:
That plant is having none of that!
May 21, 2015
Frimpinheap sez:
It is easy to hit a wall with Doom editing, since a lot of the extended features are implemented...
May 21, 2015
Frimpinheap sez:
I have been drawing the dumb lizard with awkward thumb-toes this whole time, and figured they...
May 21, 2015
chesse20 sez:
Did he have 3 arms the entire comic or did he just grow a third one in this part of the comic
May 21, 2015
chesse20 sez:
Doom is extremely easy to work with and requires no knowledge of coding or a tutorial in order to...
May 19, 2015
Frimpinheap sez:
The person likes Unity because HE is making something in Unity. He hates Doom because he made...
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    old webpages
    Mall Meh...ness
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    irrational complaining about my television set
    Dennises are dead to me
    This page is not about shoes.
    I hate shoes.
    something award related
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    Awards this website hasn't won
    The first First Beet segment
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    The same
    Umiliphus (my old derivative megamen sprite comic
    11/24/04, (I can only justify this by calling it an experiment, so I shall)
    Poetry Page
    The same