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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
November 30, 2016
freddy fox has found a chocolate egg in the middle of the birdbath.


a special message from pop tarts: poob hzej). #poobtarts

I was reminded of this when earlier today I saw somebody link to a glowing brown swirl of lines subtitled “poob” in arial font with no context

and that is comedy now.

And big business, and not in any way indecent to display in public.
Somehow i do not associate wet lumps of excrement with disinfecting a wound. Or really anything that I want in my life or the life of anyone with whom I have contact. Also, the excrement has a mouth, which indicates it can eat, and potentially produces its own excrement. And it is very enthusiastic about something, presumably that.


Oh well pardon emojME. I didn’t REALIZE that I was dealing with a BRAND. My problem all these years was assuming that being iconic meant you were instantly recognizable and did not need to inform people that you were. Even though I am Bimshwel, ribbtly-acclaimed creator of Bimshwel, the iconic brand of comic strips, greeting cards and self-destructive political commentary, I am too beloved and ubiquitous to concern myself with how anybody else perceives anything. Such as, for example, grotesque drawings of fecal matter on my website. Nonetheless I would like to discuss topics apart from fecal matter, also.


Lighter cat litter! This just looks like you put less of the same stuff in the same box and raised the price.


I do not understand the incentive to purchase this. And there is ample space on the front of the box to make anything resembling a case for it. This is literally dirt for cats to drop emojis in. It should not be mysterious. Lighter weight is not intrinsically more desirable or a sign of better technology, like on a laptoob computer. If the box is just as full as before, that means you actually made the product less efficient! It is not as if this awkward huge box would occupy less space in my house.


Although I do not understand the difference between “neutralizes odors” and “neutralizes odors GUARANTEED,” either. Are you permitted to advertise that your product does something which you would be surprised if it did? And the light litter doesn’t even suggest that it MIGHT neutralize odors, it just is light. Hey it does a terrible job and you get less than half as much in the same container, but the container is SO easy to lift!

The guaranteed product notes that it ATTACKS the odors before neutralizing them. The three KEY odors, sure to join the pantheon of other famous trios amidst the likes of musketeers, tenors, blind mice and mile islands. The non-guaranteed peasant pebbles only neutralize (without undue aggression) odors of fecal and urine style. What is the THIRD odor? The smell of ghosts so you don’t notice your soul leave your body as you consider that purchasing cat dirt has become a major decision for you?
I acknowledge that I mentioned worrying I didn’t have a soul due to other factors recently, but if it checked back in between then and now it most of a certainty has left for good by this point.


The vertical chart suggests the additional odor is that of ammonia, but my understanding was that the smell of ammonia was part of the urine smell, so it still only neutralizes two smells, guarantee notwithstanding. And then part 4 is just the clump power, which the other 2-flavor cat dirt also has, but hesitates to assign a number to.

Our greatest, nuttiest research professionals agree that two is the limit.

/////////////////


Spacko noted in a comment that the cat food and cat litter are made by the same company, which means they have a vested interest in keeping the box-filling going two different ways and may have their resources spread too thin to exercise proper quality control in any one field. It occurred to me that the Purina company was also responsible for the all time mail order video game classic Chase the Chuck Wagon.

What if Purina’s entry into the cat litter business is just a ruse to dispose of extra wide pixels made from liquidated Chuck Wagon cartridges? The “lighter” variant is literally the lighter colored pixels which of course are far lower in amount, hence their increased price.



November 23, 2016
A stagehand at the hip-hop history lesson said he was “surprised” by the ad.


I cannot really say I have the energy or interest for this right now, but nobody else seems to either, and if nobody buys any that saves me several trips in the coming weeks! The real trouble, of course, is people who do want some but don’t say anything until very late so I should probably do as I did after getting very few decisive requests last year, and just print replacements anyway. Although “Cholesteronslaught” and “Hang in Where” have not been in this series previously and it is hard to guess potential interest. Theoretically any more desirable designs could be substituted for them but I forgot to ask around about that months ago like I meant to!
Although I did not ask about any of the types and nothing has been totally un-bought. “Slopes of Lope” and “Exskis Me” have probably been bought the least times and I did not print any new ones last year, and still did not run out. I would like to take them off the chart to make it less cluttered for the things people are more likely to want if they discern the presences, but I also want to get rid of the amount I still have. But if I DO sell them that proves there IS interest which means I need to keep them on the chart!

I really should have left the pog logo alone. Perhaps I will just put a picture of a potato on the back of the new items.

Regular 8.5×11 inch prints are also generally available, for about $10 each. I realize $3 for the little things with stuff printed on both sides and 10 for something slightly larger with no ostensibly practical function may not seem to make much sense, but the big prints are ultimately better for displaying long term, whereas the cards I presume are looked at briefly and tossed away in most cases. With that in mind I offer a 33% discount on any cards you don’t want sent and will toss them away for free.



November 21, 2016
The mono mix is missing a “deedledeedledee” present on the stereo mix. I believe that the ’45 version matches this.


A sketch off of paper colored in computerly without a plan. Sometimes when I do that I think of a purpose for it by the time I finish. It is always nice when that happens!
I have loads of drawings I did not put here, and possibly have not put anywhere. Posting those might be more productive than endless circular harangues against any possible person who might still be checking this thing!
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Even though everything I say is true to the best of my knowledge and it is important to me to have my thoughts expressed someplace. These just happen to not be very helpful thoughts for general coexistence.



November 19, 2016
I had a really really weird dream this morning about Zappa’s reasons for remixing the Ruben & the Jets album.

In frak after all that, I still have not encountered, through the inadvertent channels I encounter everything else in, a solid case made FOR Clinton. Only against Trump, and in such an event people were never going to unite behind one opposition force, and trying to shame people into abandoning their alternate opposition was also never going to work. And Clinton still won the “popular” vote, because all that comes across is how popular she is and how good she is at knowing popular people. In New York and California. So make her president of New York and California. Ha ha ha I assure you the longer and bloated this post gets the less likely I am to make another!

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

With regard to my freak-up last week, I think The Media owes people either impartial reporting or a clear presentation of its biases. But they tend to assume that is not necessary and that their audience is already of one mind with them. Because they have to sell advertising, and advertisers need specific targets. Television news is complete trash. It was never presented to me as: here are the facts on these candidates.” It always came across as “our candidate is cool and we’re cool and you can be cool too! plus oh oh oh she’s a lay-deh” I suppose I should have put THAT in the spiteful little comic strip but the exact sources for each of my frustrations have been difficult to determine.
If Trump is dangerous, that ought to have been reported, and reported how so, not just show the Clinton club’s latest stupid celebrity selfie stunt. I don’t understand how I become a like a pariah for refusing to support either of them, given this climate of non-information.

I realize my current stage of distrust and discomfort came about in part to riding a hype wave to electing Obama. I wasn’t closer to any of those people afterward and felt let down by the result, and I hated myself for letting myself be led. This time, I rejected the hype wave, but I still hated myself because I have so many people around me who continued to ride the hype wave that seems to be the dominant public opinion. The difference is that I hate myself based on my own choices rather than inheriting them, so this is better, I think, I hope.
I am not scared of Trump, I am scared that I have no soul. Once I sort that out I will get back to you. Obviously I am white and in Connecticut. You know I am so bent up by this I keep forgetting that I didn’t actually vote for the guy or say a single bloody thing in support of him at any point. He is a goon. Maybe I just subconsciously relate to goons. Is my personal problem the biggest threat to the country? It IS because it underlines that I want to fight almost everybody for silly reasons. But I don’t fight them and I still want to. I don’t know any white supremacists but I know loads of people who are paranoid about white supremacists and really smug about condemning them and looking conspicuously angry about them, like that’s a challenge.


Breaking: the cast of Chess has vowed to take on Mike Pence’s support for a federal flat tax if he ever comes to Sweden.
I have no recollection of ever lacking for hamilton news, but i appreciate that it recognizes its solvency and would draw a line in the sand like that, and I don’t know what a dork like Mike Pence is thinking will happen when he attends a liberal mass service like that in person, and then when he tries to walk out while it’s happening. It’s like a scene from Rent.



November 13, 2016
In terms of this article however, both types of organs count as tentacles because in relevant ways they are structurally and functionally similar.

One more redrawn page.
I did not consider that when redrawing old comic pages it may turn out impossible for elpse to be holding nemitz in the depicted manner.


I also did not give deep consideration to whether I should replace the psychedelic patterns in the doorway here. Initially, it should not surprise you, I had not yet designed an interior for the room. Now that I have one, it is less interesting to show that than the pattern. However, it is less distracting and confusing. As bland as it looks, if were to REDESIGN the room, then I would OBVIOUSLY not do it until after I drew this page!
the tower on an isolated island on the next page is a problem. every other exterior shot suggests a group of stupid little dome houses with just trees behind them. HOWEVAH 4c parmesan cheese it should be, i think, i hope, the last last last page whose original art needs to be 100% replaced. This was easily the least pleasant one.



November 12, 2016
Cable schmable. Who needs cable when you got family by ya side?

Why am I so obsessed with proving other people wrong who do not really have different goals than I do? Because they are proud of themselves, greater in number, back each other up and treat me poorly. I think it might come down to that, and maybe it always has. I cannot devote energy to being afraid of the president-elect since I am too preoccupied with being afraid that I have no soul. If I ever sort that out perhaps I will get back to you.

————————————–

Oh but you want to know my thoughts about the united american election, right? Statistically speaking, you probably do not!
I was writing something item by item as it happened but then afterward it turned into a different story.

People love to blame Ralph Nader for W.Bush’s election, some of them more so than they blame Bush for being awful or Gore for not being better.
So instead of doing anything to alter how the system works, we shamed people who refused to go along with it. And by gorby we did it once, we can do it again.
You can grow up to be anything in America! But don’t you dare try and vote outside these two colored boxes.
I must acknowledge that without the insincerity and corporate synergy Hillary Clinton would be more appealing to ME, but would never have gotten this far.
I relate to Hillary Clinton because nobody relates to her except when she is totally fake. She changed everything about her public demeanor to help Bill Clinton’s political career, including changing her own name. It was a political liability for a husband to have a wife who kept her original name. Although perhaps that fakeness has become natural to Hillary by now.

When all the celebrities of society, especially the terrible musicians, whose influence leaves me unable to relate to a majority of the apparent population, become synonymous with a political candidate, it is hard for me to be enthusiastic. Even if that seems fickle to you, that these things are unrelated, I say they are related. The point is that I am meant to feel like I am one with these people, and these are all people that keep me alone in groups. You preach diversity but are of one mind where culture is concerned, and I objectively dislike the most highly promoted items. beyonk, ga-ga, adel, bruce stringbean, new bon jovi, I cannot listen to this. I cannot get in on this message of “love” from people who ignore or diminish me when I love something else.


I noted around 7pm that somebody had accidentally switched ABC’s live election feed with an episode of MTV Total Request Live from 1998. I didn’t want Trump to win, but I enjoyed seeing chummy smirky news people suddenly more reserved and analytical once it appeared less inevitable that their pre-coronated Clinton was going to win. I loved seeing their stupid, stupid years of speculation turn to mush on live television. I relished seeing THEM lose. I relished seeing this alliance of overconfident scumbags uncertain they would get their way. I wasn’t getting my way whatever the case, and I am not convinced their way is best. And I say that as somebody who has felt held down and alienated by republicans my whole life. The obsession with religion, the demand that I feel a certain way for certain things, the dismissal of some forms of expression as invalid. Now both parties represent that to me. So I just want whichever one is more insufferable at present to lose, but without really wanting either to win I did not feel like I had a stake in this. But I did not vote for Trump. It wouldn’t have made a difference if I had but I would never have.

Stephen colbert announced that his election night show would be LIVE on the showtime channel. Not saying anything resembling an apology for viewers who don’t have access to Showtime. Because we who don’t buy and don’t buy INTO everything are not considered real people. Just like the Throneger Games and the Soprano show, programs that require a year’s HBO subscription to get less than one new episode per month, it is presumed that if you aren’t in the club to whom that is reasonable, you don’t matter.
The night before that, Colbert had a lengthy musical piece equating a lack of desire to vote [for Clinton, who was not named during the piece] as a lack of desire to vote at all. And of course Hamilton came out at the end to win the day with rap because hip hop always wins because nobody is allowed to not be totally into it. But thankfully it was the replacement Hamilton that is less irritating despite copying the first one’s weird anachronistic facial hair.
I can’t believe ten years ago I felt like I knew this guy. Although ten years ago I thought I knew zartan and ukuhawa and bridgeportcat and it was three more years before I thought I knew science fox and you can wager none of them are talking to me ever again (although to be fair they aren’t likely talking to each other either). Am I just getting worse? (although if you are reading this please talk to me I will call you whatever name you want those are just the ones I used to call you if I mentioned you and you can call me or roneldo or john jacob jingleheimer skrimpf if you want to). Sometimes I feel like I cannot know myself and anybody else at the same time. On the internet, anyhow

As far as I have come in 15 years, I am back at how I felt: It isn’t all about New York, and it isn’t all about Los Angeles, even if that is where all the tv comes from.
There is the old part of me that thinks “oh no, democrats are losing!” but the newer part of me that didn’t see conditions improve when democrats won is uncertain how it feels.
“What this says about our country is horrifying,” a manner of statement I have seen a bunch. What it says is that no attempt is made by democrats to appeal to people who aren’t already on their side. And republicans don’t have to because their fanbase has always been more enthusiastic about voting, with better access to doing it. And they are accustomed to voting for cartoon characters. I said almost a year ago that I hoped Trump would be nominated so the party would eat itself alive not keep him out. I underestimated their ability to get behind The Party WHATEVER the cost. Even when loads of them say they won’t, they do.
It IS depressing seeing all these people despondent on twitter and thereabouts, even though prior to then I never shared in their joy. I suppose I just don’t relate to that. I know how sadness feels. I don’t know how it feels to be moved to tears over this, but I cry over things that they would never understand.
Trump of course was accused by Theodore Cruz during the campaign of having “New York Values.” And he DOES. He lost that state but he won the states who don’t realize that putting yourself first and never admitting fault are the quintessential New York Values.

Looking back to that first picture from New York City, that sums it up. “Look, all these people in NEW YORK CITY are happy, why aren’t you? There must be something wrong with you!”
I cannot support that. BUT it was not my thinking that did this. It turns out when there are two enormous groups furious at each other, they hate you even more if you refuse to unconditionally agree with either. The “with us 100% or you’re the enemy” attitude is very w-bushy. What is funny is that people who have a problem don’t actually disagree with me, they just think I disagree with them because I am not on board their socially-mandated mourning barge, even though I never have been. I wasn’t on September 11 2001, I sure as shingles am not now with regard to a man that has not actually killed somebody, however many he has groped or bankrupted. I survived two bushes and half a Reagan, can we really say this is worse before it has even happened? There are thugs in this country, and there are thugs in France and there are thugs in Russia. There are thugs in the world. There was a thuggish racist movement in this country before Trump got involved. They probably voted for Trump. And they probably voted for Mitt flippinmitten Romney because paranoid people who think the segregated water fountain period were the good old days because they had reduced awareness of world hardship at that time compared to now have gone with republicans my entire lifetime. Trump is himself thuggish but he did not create the thugs. Why do I care about this? Because this is not something that instantly came into being, and you were not going to instantly stop it. There is loads of outrage over failure to use a solution that was not actually there.

Of course it was Trump-attituded policies that likely brought about 9/11, but then make that case, please, I want to say to people. We ought to not assume everybody has the same context as we do when it comes to things like this. Try and have some empathy even when speaking of people that you presume have none. You cannot call millions of people morons and expect them to get along with you. Unless you are Trump. I think all that “haters gonna hate” swagger which the youth supposedly espouse fits Donald to a T[rump]. He wouldn’t be a billionaire without shoving his name and face everywhere with no regard for anyone else’s feelings. He seems to me more careless than hateful. Now that he is being briefed on things he seems to be, as I expected, increasingly aware that none of his ludicrous promises are feasible, or maybe he knew all along. So those unhappy about the election can at least see how it feels when the other side gets let down by the silly stuff they believed. Guantanamo Bay Prison is still open for business, but we aren’t going to start banning all Muslim immigration either! Hip hap hoorosh. The candidate got the party in power, and the party takes over with precisely what it would have done whoever was there. We might as well vote in Dennis Rodman; he at least has been to North Korea. I don’t think President Obama has even been there.

Be sad or afraid if you are, but please do not make it a contest to be saddest or afraidest, especially at the urging of a retweet chain.
The question i need to ask: was it my job to vote for Hillary Clinton or Clinton’s job to make me want to vote for her? If I had, I would have hated myself. If I had voted as I did, for Jill Stein of the green party, but claimed I voted for Clinton to join the party on facebook, I would have hated myself. If I had actually voted for Clinton, and if everyone else who voted as I did ALSO voted for Clinton, she still would not have won, because there was not a single state that Clinton lost where the number of votes the green party got was greater than the amount Clinton lost by. Gary Johnson the Libertarian, however, took a considerably larger bite of the total, and every libertarian I ever knew –granted, just one person– was a republican otherwise.
And if you go back in time and prevent Bernie Sanders from being sabotaged and change nothing else, who knows what irrational unaccountable jiu-jutsu Trump club would have dumped on him? And then you would probably see hard corn Clinton backers going libertarian because Clinton was always the foregone conclusion and Sanders was too liberal and unrealistic.

You will believe being silently unwatched by 4 people on twitter who don’t even consider you a valid enough human to disagree with and risk realizing you don’t actually disagree with them the same day, while also receiving no input from anyone else can send somebody over the edge. I have had to repeatedly remind myself that I didn’t vote for Trump because I find myself being mentally defensive of stuff that I think people are aiming at me because they think I did even though I plainly said I voted for Stein. It is bloody absurd. This is dumber than high school, and high school was extra dumb for me.
And I figured out who they were, too, nobody who should have had any problem with me. You might think it insane that I try to determine who they are, but that helps me ascertain why they did it, and if there was anything I could have done to prevent it, or if there would be any point to, if they would just overinterpret something else later. These people, they didn’t even know me and they didn’t care to try. Except one sort of did, and still dumped me without a single word, and that hurts. It isn’t as bad as fearing for my life, but what is that life worth? This amounts to feeling: I don’t matter, and nothing I try can make me matter. Please understand, I do not relate on a mass scale. I relate personally. And how many others have not taken the step to numerically shun me but have censored me, again without checking if I meant what they thought I did, with the mute command? And who else are they doing that to? That is just dirty. That does not aid discourse or clarity. I am a real person, not an episode of Blue Bloods.
With that said, if I have not opted to follow these accounts myself, do they really owe me any level of regard? Maybe not, but I end up thinking they do since it IS to me a big deal when I do opt in like that. It means I believe in this person and their content to a degree beyond what I would by default. It means I have a desire to be close to this person in this medium. And when I give up on it, I have a reason for that also. Even if it is a stupid reason. If somebody were to ask why I could say: because I don’t like when you talk about the digestive enzyme fluid generated by people’s mouths. I should go to bed.

Perhaps this is old news in the electronic communication realm but this is the first time I could articulate exactly why it hurts me personally. This is a real issue for me right this moment. Communication barriers are important. How often is this happening every single day over dumber slights than this? And I unwatch others for fickle reasons. Like stuff nobody could ever guess. But generally it has to be personal. Sometimes I resist doing it because I think it will come across as hurtful. Is this the mindset of a hateful person? I hate to th- oh well there we go.


Maybe if I spent more time styling my toothbrush and raising awareness of the end of the alphabet I would have less time to dwell on things like this!



November 6, 2016
Thou bulk of spirit void! I once again, blind and in chains, provoke thee to the fight!


A new music “video” that is perhaps best off only listened to!
The music was started in 2011, and “finished” the past two weeks.
Initially I intended to use just one picture, but it did not match the horizontal frame orientation, so I needed it to scroll. But that created the impression this was a “video” and not just music, so I added a few more drawings. They seemed to linger on the screen for too long, so I extended the theme to every picture I had of a dangerous or scary vegetable. Later it became any picture of a vegetable. I have observed that the increased amount of motion has reduced the acceptable length of time that anything can NOT move before I feel uncomfortable looking at it.

And so, the NEXT time I upload music, it will just be one picture, alright? Great.



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
Titash
pc72
Pickford
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

i warned you about this
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    01/06/04
    Movies I'm not going to see
    11/14/03
    Back fashion school to
    09/14/03
    Movies Make Me Mad. Moreso.
    06/14/03
    JList
    06/03/03
    France
    03/31/03
    Official pizza of Nascar
    03/16/03
    Browsers
    02/23/03
    Michael Jackson
    2/16/03
    Free Speech
    02/05/03
    Thursday
    01/23/03
    Doofs
    01-whenever-03
    NO
    12/11/02
    Film Critics. I hate them.
    10/15/02
    Coconuts. I hate those as well.
    10/14/02
    Independence Day
    Some time in July 2001
    other things
    Awards this website hasn't won
    mysterious
    The first First Beet segment
    05/28/10
    Embarrassing pictures 1
    09/17/04
    Embarrassing pictures 2
    The same
    Umiliphus (my old derivative megamen sprite comic
    08/15/03
    Hopeless.swf
    11/24/04, (I can only justify this by calling it an experiment, so I shall)
    sandwich.swf
    02/16/05
    FACK
    ??/??/??
    Poetry Page
    The same