I think that is awfully presumptuous of you, but I suppose you know you better than I do.
I didn’t need proof that March Madness is as boring as any other start and stop start and stop 3 hour regulation-choked sponsor-stricken modern sport exhibition, but the fact that these red and white lumps of rubber are more exciting by a considerable margin was nonetheless revealed to me. Oh yes and there are shoes, also.
There is a video for it. I have not watched the video. I do not want to know more about it. I do not have room in my brain to accommodate all the other ways this and its marketing is screwed up.
Anybody who uses the phrase “pause live tv” is already beyond reason, and is testing to see if you also are. Once you PAUSE a broadcast, it is no longer live. I thought that was obvious but I have heard it used in sales pitches for years. Maybe it is still CLOSE to live if you de-pause within a certain period but the fact of the matter is that words are supposed to have meanings, and when somebody trying to sell you a product can alter those meanings and not get called out on it, they know they are free to insult your intelligence in other ways. Just like the Disney corporation can literally non-euphemistically state that its theme parks are made out of magic. Hence shoes that order pizza.
i cannot imagine a scenario in which it is easier to press a button on a shoe than just about any other object in your house. Nor can I conceive of any occasion in which i would wear a shoe which looked like that or would eat a Pizza Hut brand pizza, much less pay for the privilege of wearing that shoe and not being able to order another kind of pizza with it and all but assuring I get myself permanently placed on every twit-targeted marketing mailing list for the rest of my life. The amount of laziness necessary for this to make sense is at odds with the sort of person who wears shoes indoors. When will they come out with an ugly black t-shirt that orders pizza? A long time ago my father wore shoes indoors. They were not sneaker shoes, much less bright red ones, and he did not eat pizza. And if he ate pizza it wouldn’t be this pizza. And he already had a biological handicap against being able to identify an edible pizza on account of being English.
But consider that this is made for people who already pay whatever cable companies tell them to for dumb exclusive sport packages and whatever Best Buy tells to them for whatever latest imperceptible buzzword type of “hi def” that came out this week –that no programming actually broadcasts in EXCEPT the sports that collude with tv companies to insist is necessary and ensure is economically viable to put into production– but think they need to save money by purchasing/ pledging their lives to cut rate pizza. This is for slobs who think they haven’t done enough to lower other peoples’ opinion of them. As much as i personally like the idea of dressing like Ronald McDonald and eating a competitor’s product, I don’t see pizza hut offering the yellow jump suit.
Yikes I remember when this kind of shoe was implied to be crucial for athletic performance. Now that playing video games is considered athletic competition, companies are looking for ways to market exclusive designer slobwear. Not that eating pizza, even a good one, is conducive to operating a control device with both hands, but maybe next year there will be a shoe with a button that tells your live-in nurse to shove a slice of pizza in your mouth. And then the next year there will be a shoe with a button that pumps power diarrhea directly into your toilet.
I stole that from an old Late Night With Conan O’Brien “in the year 2000” line but it is fine since that one was about Taco Bell.
the article does say that only 50 sets of shoes are being made and no price is set, which means this is not a product realistically marketed at consumers. This is something for human-shaped sewage golems like Jared Fogle and Martin Shkreli to buy before they get sent to prison. This is something used to get Pizza Hut and NCAA free publicity in the form of “tech” websites reporting on the moronic audacity of it but pretending they are neutral by not saying so, thereby indicating approval of the system from whence it came. This article is literally an advertisement for multinational corporations just in and of themselves, openly admitting in the first line that it is a “publicity stunt,” and also that this is not the first time this specific publicity stunt was stunted, and it is disgusting that any website will accept money to cover it, and probably even worse if they do it for free.
oh oh yes we geeks are so wonderfully weird in the way we get total garbage marketed at us and then we buy it and tell other people to buy it because we’re so quirky and new and not mainstream in our utter empty spineless ventriloquist dummy normalcy. I don’t know how you can have “opinionated apple buying guide”s in the plural because you can accomplish that in one word: “don’t.” If you call yourself a “geek” and your only gripe about this shoe story is that it implies you watch sports then congratulations, I am sure life is very comfortable for you apart from that because The Matrix is real and really lame.
our basic homo sapien dignity isn’t a product, right?
In the end it doesn’t matter if you think pizza shoes are stupid or a good idea unless you can afford them. On a grander scale it doesn’t matter if you think ANYTHING is stupid if you can’t afford these stupid hideous foot-cocoons to honor orange slop on a disk of glue. And the megabillion dollar college sport associations that don’t pay any of their players want you to remember that, and that is why we will go extinct ages before the earth crashes into the sun. No price is too high to flaunt your ability to pay any price for objects of no worth.
I have many stories to tell and pictures for most of them but no energy to pound them into coherence.
a animated pixel commission icon for bats of, what else, a chicken person named Bwengo, who does not appear at all pleased about it.
I thought at first that I would not be able to draw this at all, especially considering the state of the reference images which had been illustrated by a third party who is obsessed with drawing gross things, or non-gross things in a gross way. People eat that up. I don’t know why. I can’t eat something that looks gross. Which of course can be in your favor when you resemble a chicken, but once again I seem to be in an extreme minority here. But I found a way to draw it which was not gross, and since there are almost 0 chicken human hybrid enthusiasts on the internet this animation will not be circulated among them so that I get a superficial increase in viewership whose goal is to find the part of the drawing(s) about which I am least comfortable and try to convince me to quadruple down on it for them for less money and then either shun me when I refuse or worse, NOT shun me and keep at it. This isn’t one of the stories I am too tired to tell! This is one of the stories that contributes to me being too tired to talk about anything more potentially entertaining! Creepy people used to be FUNNY to me. But now that they are creepy directly TO me, to try and make ME creepy, my only defense is to become BORING instead!
Yes this was almost two years ago, when melt-fetishists thought *I* must be a melt fetishist because I drew animations of things melting because I thought it was funny, and I have kept future incidents from happening with foot fetish people who thought *I* was a foot fetish person because I thought feet were funny, but I kept them from happening by changing into a boring person who says nothing strange or ambiguous, and I stopped THINKING in a strange way, even in venues totally unrelated to me trying to get money for artwork without pursuing it through legitimate channels. Even though the fact that people read my humor as perversion and my actual perversion as banality is the strangest thing of all.
I was talking to this person for hours just because it was so bizarre and I could hardly believe that somebody was sending me all these weird pictures and videos, mixed in with totally innocuous clips of stuff filmed underwater and from a helicopter. And I subconsciously changed my entire public persona just to stop that from happening again. Bloody rubbish. Please don’t send me pictures of bloody rubbish.
The fact of the madder is that “normal” people get really weird when they are sexual, and under just the wrong circumstances, they interpret my latent aversion to typicality as eroticism.
Gosh looking at this now it appears that I only drew half of the nose ring during the pecking part. Oops. I merely forgot to finish shading it but the effect is the same since it is visible so briefly that its impression is partly subliminal. It seems like there is one big dark nostril on one side and not the other. I had been trying NOT to look at the animation between when I declared it done and this point since I was worried I would see something that I had a little problem with and treat it like a huge problem. But this IS a BIG problem. But I already posted this on the sharing sites; anybody who was going to see this already has. If I fix that, nobody will ever know! What a tragedy. Except for you dear viewer! For you and for me I will fix it. Yes yes yes. In fact I already did. There is no reason to have the picture of the wrong frame here! Get that out of here!
(please do not read this if you have not seen the film but intend to. There may also be other reasons to not read this!)
I saw black panther der film (based on the presumably well known comic book character) not terribly long ago. I thought it was a functional film though not totally cohesive and nothing about it surprised me. Probably better than Thor 2 but not as good as Thor 3. Goy was *I* wrong!
And during a brief exposure to nbc olympic coverage that I recalled afterward, a hypey promotion identified it as “A GAME CHANGER!” among other exclamatory phrases in big gold text that supposedly were said by real people whose job it is to say things like that. Trying to find that advertisement on the internet to get a picture of it is not a good use of my time. The important thing is that without me paying any particular attention it is clear that somebody wants, NEEDS me to believe that my life was changed by this dumb movie.
Black Panther is a ‘game changer’ because it shows that Marvel films can be just as dull, fragmented and focused on the non-hero identities as DC films, I suppose. Panther appears to have the approximately same skill set as Batman and indeed spends as much of the movie out of costume and occasionally out of the movie that he seems like a secondary character. He has a big fight toward the end but it isn’t the main fight and you can’t see what he is doing since he is fighting somebody else with almost the same black costume, in the dark, with a train blocking your view half the time. And it seems like this fight stops and restarts in much the same manner several times just to drag it out to match the length of the other fight they aren’t in. I only remembered after I left the theater that there was another costumed action sequence in South Korea earlier in the film because that seemed like it was in a different movie and I had to remind myself I had seen it the same evening.
He is not a “radical superhero.” The man he fights, Killmonger, is more radical than he is (so obviously that guy has to die). His sister Shuri is more radical than he is. ooh ooh she calls the white american cia agent “colonizer!” and then tells him all Wakanda’s state secrets despite him already having been shown as complicit in a scheme to buy them from the person who murdered Wakanda’s own king and her father, with diamonds stolen from other African countries and later asks him to shoot down planes piloted by her own black Wakanda countrymen because the US government underwrites all our big budget action movies but puts in insults like “colonizer” so we think they don’t.
Panthy may be the only person in the film who isn’t radical. He willingly gives up his power twice so other people can fight him for claim to it. The only thing he does that is radical is declare his own country’s traditions ludicrous and refuse to go along with them, at least after he loses his royal title legally via those traditions. Hopefully the radicality of telling ghosts they are wrong includes no longer willingly giving up his power in the future. Or declaring that only one person in the whole nation is allowed to have the magic plant the power comes from, as from the look of things they could give it to everybody. Or at least they could until Killmonger burned it all without even saving a stash for himself and then the one plant that was saved was instead of being replanted, fed to Panther even though he already screwed up.
The most intriguing characters, to me, were the ape-worshipers in the ice fortress, and they were in the movie even less than the title figure!
But once the media narrative is out there that this movie has some sort of profound message that the world Needs Right Now it keeps rolling down a hill like a cartoon snowball becoming ever larger in defiance of basic snow physics and few people seem to acknowledge it as a fictional contrivance.
Why should I be so bothered by this? I have felt for ages like almost all our acclaimed media is declared “acclaimed” on invalid terms, loudly and constantly so that common people believe it. What is different now is the forced idea that we are living in the most enlightened and progressive time of all times. Why is it important for people to believe that? Is that supposed to make us want to buy more garbage? More and more garbage than ever before? Peoples’ lives have so little meaning now that they need noiser and boastier false statements of meaning. Which also isn’t new but at some point you can’t get any louder. Lying to yourself that an unholy corporate behemoth made a movie which temporarily solved social inequality doesn’t do any more to get fake nazis to stop appropriating your ugly cartoon frogs than selling trashy merchandise asserting your right to punch them does, but it does make it easier for that behemoth to keep washing your brain in the same brine while it continues to eat smaller behemoths that by any other measure would be quite large.
And that is another matter: Black Panther and all his friends are born into affluence. The only person who isn’t is the guy he kills. “Killmonger” becomes king and has differing ideas about Wakanda’s needless secrecy, secrecy which had condemned him to a life of poverty, but he is implausibly irrational and unforgiving so that he is entirely unsympathetic. Panther only acknowledges the secrecy is ineffectual after his enemy does, and then his enemy still has to die. That yet allows the film have a message of “the wealthy should help others in the end,” except “the wealthy” in this case are from a fictional country that controls magic from space. And then white American CIA man is in attendance applauding because it isn’t HIS country that has to change. In fact WAKANDA’s money is going to come to AMERICA to help poor kids. Which is FINE if you accept that the film is a FANTASY whose intent is to amuse viewers. The dilapidated apartment complex in Oakland California that Wakanda people buy up to renovate wasn’t even filmed in Oakland! It was shot in ATLANTA Georgia. Oakland got no money from this movie!
The “Sweet Auburn” neighborhood where that WAS filmed does indeed has a history of suffering under segregation, but by the same token that Oakland didn’t get any money, Auburn didn’t get any recognition. And that is FINE in a fancy bit of stagecraft based on a comic book because it ISN’T REAL anyway!
Disney putting one gay character in each of their movies or at least making cynically planned leaks implying that they might doesn’t do a thing for actual social justice. I saw that Beauty + Beast remake also and Lefou “being” gay is about the least relevant dumb thing about it and that isn’t directly indicated anywhere, either.
That whole story was an exaggeration to get press and fan-wank points without them actually having to commit to any real change, and they get to have news stories saying both things, possibly at the same time. I expect that the writers remembered when JK Rollingsworth announced that Dumbledory was gay and got press for that (hence MY knowing about it) even though she was already done writing the Helly Pothuh books and never actually put that in any of them. And so the more recent Beast’s movie’s only goals were to make money by riding a wave of “retro” media regurgitation, to ret-con its previous movie to be mostly the same except where it conflicted with contemporary entertainment mores, and most fundamentally to establish a cartoon from 1991 as “the original” version of a story from centuries ago. And if you think this 2017 movie is a waste of time that is at best is a sad pageant imitation of a “masterpiece” then Disney still wins! People go buy fresh copies of that and themed merchandise to take pictures of themselves being owned by.
Certainly a MAIN character in a major budgeted mainstream mush being ACTUALLY gay without that being a joke or shoved into people’s business like “oooh isn’t this RADICAL?” would help to normalize it, and make people fuss over it less when it happens again. Although until it DOES happen I don’t give anyone credit for talking about it MAYBE happening in the future, and that still wouldn’t make the movie it happens in automatically bearable.
The fact of the madder is that almost everybody I have contact with is hopelessly depressed. The only ones who think they aren’t are hopelesslier addicted to stupid cartoons and video games, memey hogwash and hypey rubbish in support of those things because if they allowed themselves to think, they would realize how depressed they are.
To reiterate, I think the Black Panther’s film is fine, and it did what it did without relying on characters from other Marvel movies, which I don’t think has happened in this series since Iron Man in 2008. Although much of the VALUE of the series IS its ability cross things over, but it gets out of hand, and can be frustrating when a character whose movie you haven’t seen is suddenly THERE and meant to be recognized but you can’t because too many of them wear dark body suits without helmets. The people who created Black Panther are not necessarily complicit in the campaign to have the latest mildly above average bit of distraction material be declared society’s ambrosia, but I doubt they are questioning their inclusion in it either. I am thankful to have new non-internet proof that this campaign exists, because the last few years it has mostly manifested in things I had NOT experienced, because I was near television a lot and saw the hype first and thereby became too biased to assess them honestly. Being biased does not mean you are wrong. But it does mean you need to work harder to be certain you are not wrong. I was unilaterally biased against Disney for over 10 years and so I stopped complaining about it [as much] for a while, thinking I looked foolish and might possibly be unfair. But I have seen Frozen AND Tangled since my niece Violet was baptized in the princess indoctrination glitter cloud by forces beyond my control. And I can say with as much honesty as I trust myself to have that I think Tangled is probably a better film than Frozen, but if watching Frozen with Violish one more time would magically purge Tangled from existence, i would do it. And if watching both Beauties and both Beasts back to back would purge both those other two then gosh gad why not apart from that not actually being likely to work, because at least 1991 BnB has whimsy and 2017’s tepid re-enactment momentarily permits people to remember that whimsy was once allowed.
Seeing the way people talk about Black Panther after I saw it reminds me of what I also see people retroactively saying about Zelda Skyward Sword compared to the 5 outta 5 release hype. I don’t need to get into this matter deeply but I lost interest in the Zelda series after being utterly disinterested in and frustrated by Ocarina of Time, but my sister liked that one a lot so I tried to imagine I just did not have the right mindset and dexterity for it. But I saw her take to the follow up games with utter sincerity and willingness to enjoy them, and for the first time we could BOTH see all the bland tedious poorly designed gate-keeping hassles that I already considered the series synonymous with, albeit without the hideous n64 graphics or endless repetition of dopey 3-note jingles.
of course the posters outside the cinema would have me believe that peter flippin dippin bippin rabbit is a radical superhero. Yes compared to THAT Black Panther is highly significant. It isn’t enough to give the smug homogenite treatment to every remotely popular culture figure from my life time, evidently. They have to mess with my great grandparents’ too now. This just looks like the sequel to “Hop.”
No Peter rabbit is not an off-brand bugs bunny who chomps carrots while winking at the camera and then stuns Mr. McGregor with a big smooch before clobbering him with his own rake. Peter Rabbit steals RADISHES for his own personal benefit and runs away because he is TERRIFIED since his father rabbit did the same thing and got caught and baked into a pie. He isn’t a “rebel” out to cause trouble. He is just foolish. Beatrix Potter’s characters are entertaining because they are foolish, not because they are “cool.” What is even the point? There will only be name recognition among people who would find this ghastly.
Also: I know what “hop” is and yet recall that it exists because a person known as Bunsen robisioned me to draw their rabbit character one time and some unaffiliated degenerate saw it, copied it and uploaded it to this gross cartoon pornography site and identified it as homage art to “hop (movie)” even though the dork from Hop isn’t half classy enough to half-dress this well.
This looks familiar. I thought it prudent to find a way to make this look dumber so I could post it on faceboof, where animated gifs are justifiably not permitted.
The lizard of two evils
in the disrespect that it looks very stupid and is also animated.
The dumbest thing is that the lizard thinks it has to change its pose to a broader stance with its arms crossed, like that will impress people, which is NOT the case. What that absurd moron fails to recognize is that nobody on earth or elsewhere is impressed. Not elpse. Not even the dope! nemitz, maybe, but i think we should all aim for better than that. It also seems unaware that its head is disproportionate to its body until it falls down since the square boundaries are difficult to optimize for an upright-standing figure. Or even a degenerate bow-legged dork like this one.
i absolutely did not need to make this. I considered that i had not animated anything recently, and also that my most-appreciated overall artwork have been low resolution pixel icons.
And apart from one that made before I knew what I was doing, they all feature other people’s characters. Some of which I do not like at all. Not necessarily any of those, though not necessarily not NOT any of those. And those that I dislike inspire other people with equally bland or worse requests to come to me instead of ones I could potentially find a mutually beneficial situation with. Which is not to say that i APPROVE of either of the morons that I am showing today, but i disapprove of them in a way that amuses me. Nor do I mean to suggest that I think drawing dumb garbage like this and then waiting is going to solve any problem, but I was starting to think that anything by me with wiggling creature toes being used as even a remote representation of myself, as I had done with the second icon here, was creating problems.
I could not tell you WHY there even is a problem that exists which is caused by that. I have lived a strange and unrealistic life, and that has its consequences.
If only life could be such a fantasy! It would surely be my final, were i to believe in it.