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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
October 25, 2010
The adventure is in the spirit of the warrior, and the warrior… is YOU

drat it all, I got some inspiration. I will have to wait until tomorrow, then.

========================================================

Nurvmembo furf:
I will see about posting something later. It will probably be very short.
Oh no actually today’s still legally the third. I no longer have any natural concept of what day it is.

=======================================================

Nubembor thoid:
as far as I am yet aware the spray-paint didn’t give me cancer, but I’ll be a monkey’s umbrella if this superglue leaves me with any fingerprints in the end. Although in such a state I would be an unlikely suspect in any police proceedings anyhow so it is unlikely my print condition would make much difference. Time for a crime spree.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

November foist:
Oh bixby, another seven days with no update.


This only makes it worse.

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*


Why does livejournal still remember the birthday of an account that was deleted five years ago and what does it expect me to do with this information?

Why did I not allow my mother to continue believing that I had, in old times, refused to play Battletoads?

Why did I wake up September 5 2010 to find a used twinkie wrapper in my bedroom when I’ve not eaten or touched a twinkie in my life nor known anybody who does?


2008. This was not consumed out of youthful foolishness by a previous tenant. Somebody ate this within the past three years. Maybe someone I know. Why did this person eat that? Why do I know this person? Why do I have this person’s trash?

Very good. You have acknowledged the trash can. What comes next?



Splendid. Just be more discrete about it, lest you rouse to action

OH NO! TRASH GORDON! We do have one option. It’s worked before…

Back off, Gordsy. I’m very afraid to use this but I will if it becomes necessary. Yes indiddly, we truly do live in an age of unprecedented prosperity. Now anybody who can afford to may have the luxury of defeating Flash Gordon. Logically this also ought to work on people whose names rhyme with his.



Beets to it all, I was not prepared for such cowardice and deception! I fear we have not seen the last of this villain. He knows he cannot compete with my arsenal. No doubt he has sought the monetary assistance of his influential aristocratic ally

GILES RUBBISH. This rules out getting Scruffy the Dumpster Slayer on my side. And this is too stupid to continue. Good day.



October 21, 2010
Aftermath of Ohmageddon

How ever did this happen? Not the depicted incident, just that I finally got a picture here without a certain annoying red imp in it and another red imp shows up.

I owed a thing to Matugi anyway, I think, but really he is a nice fellow who is well deserving of anything. This took far longer than it ought to have because perspective is my nemesis. nemitz is also my nemitsis but we aren’t talking about that.

I have great fondness for unfortunate imps, evidently. Well!

I didn’t think to mess with the colors until I had already declared the thing finished. I like the next-to-last one best. This is probably an important point in time, as the things I did after this were considerably more likely to have messed up colors in them than previous stuff had been.



October 19, 2010
The men wanted to break me, steal and bring me down, but I fought for you and later they were lying on the ground.


A LIE TOLD 100,000 TIMES IS THE TRUEST TRUTH
Wow, I think you might really be on to nothing! Nice work remembering the comma in 100000, though. I might not have had respect for you otherwise.


what about one told 99,000 times?

What about if the only way you can think to communicate your grand old thought is to write it anonymously on a bathroom wall then maybe it’s not such a clever good idea?

The actual line is “a lie told often enough becomes the truth,” often attributed to Vladimir Lenin, which puzzles me, given this sector’s clear aversion to commie ideology evident in replacing vodka with generic booz. I don’t know if Mr. Lenin actually said that, but the line itself is always the same. It is important to include the part about the lie becoming “truth.” A change is occurring and it’s sort of a sinister change. The other way suggests that it was true all along, and there’s nothing sneaky about it, and that it may have been covered up. It’s the truest truth there is. You’ve missed the point entirely. Lenin was explaining a way to control people, and you’re just enthusiastic about being an idiot trying to seem smart by getting quotes wrong.

R’AMEN, BRO

I’m sure Lenin would have appreciated your religious convictions.


Eyyyyy! Thums up.

Well how about that.
It was not I who added the R before the “AMEN,” because I do not approve of standard store-purchased ramen noodle packages due to the high sodium content. Yes, I will regularly eat entire pizzas with similarly outlandish salt content and in with much larger portions, but not out of dinkity little wax paper cups. I am a glutton with class.

I really have put this off for far too long.


While I don’t doubt the work they do is often undervalued, this seems to suggest that the janitors being underpaid has led to the asinine grafitti not being cleaned up. I think that merely means we need new janitors. There is a difference between standing up for your rights and doing a deliberately shoddy job.


Revolution! Rise up! Rise up! Disgrimeament is the ideal of soapcialism*

Nooooooski! Don’t listen to him! This will only lead to a new elite ruling class of complacent fat cat janitors!

Aw beans.


On the plus side I’ve been waiting years to test my secret weapon.

*you’re lucky I tried at all.



October 12, 2010
It’s alarming how charming I feel

I get exposed to all sorts of fascinating intellectual concepts when I use my parents’ kitchen table to work on art projects that I hate. Things like TVGuide’s 25 Greatest TV Characters of All Time. Because calling it The Establishment’s Arbitrary Quantity of Ubiquitous TV Dads on Shows that Made a lot of Money From the Last 40-or-so Years seems less authoritative.

===============================

All the digital cameras I want to buy have unsightly abrasions cut into them to allow noise to flow in and out of the camera to pick up audio while recording video. I don’t understand why they can’t just use a series of lines instead of dots or one line or something that doesn’t remind me of skin disease. Or simply not have them at all because I just want to take still pictures anyhow [but don’t want a camera from 2005 because they didn’t come in green back then].

I suppose I can cover the spot with tape, but I’ve been carrying around a camera with tape on it for six years and if I bought a new one and still put tape on it I would have to explain why and if I primarily bought the thing because of its appearance this would seem like a silly move apart from that.

=============================

Hey, ten days without an update!

but fortunately for you I have undocumented gender issues and am reluctant to publicly self-identify as one, thus even strict adherence to the instructions would not succeed in getting me gone. But ten days, I think that is a record for me. A pity my record player broke in 1997 or so. I assure I would have thought I have thought that was quite funny in 1997.

On that note: yeah, great that you sell these. What the florian helmberger am I supposed to play these on? Am I just supposed to keep these around because they make me look sophisticated? And what kind of a degenerative society has a definition of sophistication which only requires that I own something from the 1970s? Why don’t I hang up a re-elect Ford poster and switch out my computer for a Magnavox Odyssey and my bathtub for a Pontiac Grand Am? I shall I cancel Gabe Kaplan’s parole from under my bed and have fresh asbestos insulation installed. Then I will be respected.



Burst me bagpipes, I haven’t gone back far enough! I’ll need to get a Tennis for Two machine and separate but equal sputniks and a six pack of Cherry Polio. Now that this is out of the way we can move on to more important matters.

I fear that this guy may be shattering windas deliberately because he enjoys the act of replacing them so much. He’s less excited by the destruction aspect of it… who has the TIME, really? Thankfully, there are many opportunities to break windows which you might not be aware of.

My favorite error is when I drag objects to the task bar. Windows hates that SO much. It can tell what I want to do, and Microsoft is all about assuming it knows what I want and hiding options it thinks I don’t, but in this one situation… NO, it’s not having ANY of that. It strongly objects to this protocol breach. It cannot STAND that I have tried to do this. In fact we haven’t been on speaking terms for a while.

A shame, since it was always at its core the excuse we both needed to compare our exotic hat collections.



October 2, 2010
It was 125Th/year during period Sadam is working for the American to destroy Iran (matching period Ben Laden also but as a CIA agent / Bush family friend)

If I get cancer for this class from using spray paint I had better be given at LEAST a b- out of it.

============================

Friday, October 8: I bought a glue gun today. I did not, however, update this website.

============================

Don’t eat this enigmatic cholesterol lump because somebody dared you to.
I will probably eat a KFC double-down before I die. I just don’t want it to be immediately before or why.



First of all, does anybody really clench their tongue out the side of their mouth like that? I never do that. I would know if I did. I know when a wet thing touches my epidermis.


Walter the hobo… I’m supposed to be afraid of this guy but I can’t when he does that.

More to the point, is it truly necessary for the two lower guys to hold up the bagel while the third one cuts it? They are endangering the cutter, and endangering themselves by being so near the path of the blade. Apart from creating unsafe work conditions and unnecessary liability, they are themselves unnecessary and should be fired immediately. The cutter should also be fired for walking on the food. All three should be required to take a neckerchief management class. Fire the bagel, too; they’re boring. The knife may stay. I approve of its stripes.


But nobody ever listens to me, does they? Last year I repeatedly reiterated my belief that every one of them should also be fired immediately, yet here they are again. In fact they are even more numerous than before. That less is going wrong does not change that just as much is going right.
The mouse creature, curiously about one fourth the size of the squirrel creature (the one in the grid-pattern jacket. YES that’s supposed to resemble a squirrel GOSH), was initially sitting on a conveniently placed curb-edge from the reference picture found online which I started with, but when I actually visited the place I saw that there was no curb at all, just a brief slope. Thus, a banana.


And who’s this? This is the character that I had to remove from the picture to preserve balance. You can see how well that worked out. I wasn’t entirely sure what he was wearing, anyhow. I could have switched him with the tall kid, but that kid was at least tall, whereas this one is about the same size as the dopey tail-ed miscreants.

I hear the actual 5000 event occurred while I was safely out of the country a few weeks ago in August. However, when I initially created this image, I faced the fears and apprehensions of those who initially misread the lettering to believe that DOPE IS COMING. Permit me to emphasize:NO dOPES ARE COMING AND NO dOPES HAVE COME. That needed to be said. I had nothing to do with that.
This makes me think that I should devote a page to all the times other people have drawn stupid things like dopes and dope sympathizers. Not because I think you care, but just so I don’t forget. It’s happened a few times by now and I’m starting to worry.


In other nopes I was forbidden to take pictures of this building, even to use as guide for a picture intended to represent a charity for patients at this very hospital. And so I stopped taking them.

In the event you are curious, the charity is to raise money to help the patients get treatment, not to give them cancer.

We’re trying to run a business, after all.



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
Titash
pc72
Pickford
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

i warned you about this
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