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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
November 25, 2020
“We know he broke some part of the Federal Aviation Act, and as soon as we decide which part it is, some type of charge will be filed. If he had a pilot’s license, we’d suspend that, but he doesn’t.”


aw naw blippy.
according to legend, recently my mother Thorax was shopping with my slightly-less-recently-turned-six-years-old niece Violin and pointed out this display, then Violin said something like “i don’t like Blippi anymore.” Thorax responded “well maybe it is something for littler kids” and then Violin said “NO, it’s for ALL kids.” However neither turns out to be true, for the boxes here all say

“Not for children under 3 years.” You are either meant to blatantly ignore the safety guidelines associated with this screeching preaching hyperactew or encourage children old enough to know better to partake of his offerings.
I first became aware of blipson 1-3 years ago at a time when Violin was perhaps just entering the target range of these toys and fortunately either they weren’t available or we simply had not come across any. Unfortunately his videos were in ample supply and I had my fill surprisingly quickly, even beside a child who watched the utterly braindead and marketer-approved “baby shark” on a loop. blippo is extraordinarily annoying and creepy. He tries to put forth an “educational” image but it is fake. Even these boxes say “collect them all,” which is a fundamentally uneducational thing to encourage anybody to do at any age.


It seems that many adults also think he was/is creepy but cannot articulate why. I can. I just never had a justification to until he appeared in real space that I potentially have access to. He is creepy because he is phony and gross. Even before I knew he was a shill for mass-produced landfill filler I thought that, though that helps me put it better in perspective. That guy looks like he smells like human fecal matter and apple juice. Largely due to the combination of neon plastic clothes like kids wore in the early 1990s but the full grown man body and the fact that he is never ever fully shaven and his mouth never fully closed. he looks like a mentally disabled adult. which isn’t a crime but I was in special education, as a student, for a long time, and this guy reminds me of some of the more tragic cases, except it’s totally deliberate. including the attire like a parent chose and applied it, the ugly hat that looks like a helmet and worst of all the facial hair. That cartoon drawing of him makes sure to color in the place where his beardling is in a slightly darker color. Not a real beard, just light annoying hair so that he looks dirty. it reminds me of when somebody uses scissors to cut the tag off of blankets or cushions instead of removing the stitching, so there is always tag residue and it is worse than the full tag being there because I KNOW it is there but it can hide. I don’t want to worry about Blippy hiding in my bed when I stay at a motel.
The writer of that other piece annoyed by blippi concedes “He’s wholesome” but he isn’t! He is bad. He’s even named after the sound of swear words being covered up on broadcast television. In actual video blechhi is loud and obnoxious, and again it is totally deliberate and calculated. I think hating something for being deliberately annoying is valid. Even if an annoying thing has ostensibly educational goals. It is not socially educational. Nobody should aspire to act how he acts. And the guy is maybe educational about one tenth of the time, and just being a noisy jackass the rest of the time. The contradictions are maddening. He is childlike but built like some creep who got drunk at your house and passed out on your couch. he is exuberant and innocent yet condescending if you have soda in your house. He is utterly amasculine, but with that ugly forced mini-beard like he is a stock photo of a “rebel entrepreneur,” while dressed and talking like

Tony Barbieri, writer of ‘Monroe,’ Mad Magazine’s worst recurring feature, portraying Jake Byrd, one of Jimmy Kimmel’s numerous worst recurring features. Who is also unforgivably annoying but fortunately not marketed at toddlers and thus never going to get into the toy section of a department store.

I had to delete the email that I forwarded to myself with the store photograph in it just because seeing his sleaze makes me so uncomfortable. I mean blippy’s sleaze, not byrd’s, but byrd would also have to go in the mercifully improbable same situation. And then I avoided looking at the picture between then and today, and realized I initially misread, at small size on my mobile machine, the command “let’s roll” as “let’s pop,” and prepared some statements about why “let’s pop” is a stupid thing to say and now I can’t even use that*, and I think that also counts as a valid reason to not like blipli. Certainly it is better for his case that he isn’t commanding children to pop with him, but I don’t want him commanding children to do anything with him. I’m not saying I think he is a sexual predator, but I would only be about 5% surprised if he was. But I also am never surprised when anybody who gets rich off of youtube videos turns out to be one of those or a neo-nazi, and it seems like they all eventually do.
Isn’t it fundamentally un-wholesome of me to encourage such a strong rejection of someone, especially an ostensibly educational persona, based on how they look and sound? Not if the rejectee is only pretending to look and sound that way. blippi is deliberate, blippi is an act, by an actor, and I have every right to disapprove of that act simply on the basis of its outward appearance. And as noted he’s also selling toys designed to look like him now.

Say what you must about Michael Jackson, but dressing like a clown, having a ferris wheel at his house, having a life-size cardboard cutout of Peter Pan in his bed room, that wasn’t an act, that was real, and everybody could see it, and they STILL let their kids sleep next to him. It is bizarre now that youtube actors in a sense emulate some of Jackson’s weirdness on purpose and they still get encouraged for it.

*
what does “let’s pop!” mean? surely this is not encouraging children to overinflate themselves, but I don’t know what else it might mean in this context. it reminds me of when TNN The Nashville Network realized Nashville, Tennessee, after which it was named and at whose residents it was aimed, was just one place that people in most other places didn’t care about and rebranded itself “the national network” and used the slogan “we’ve got pop!” and it failed because that is stupid and meaningless and STILL didn’t make anyone forget that the N really meant Nashville, then they turned into Spike TV because spikes are always marketable. Someone in chicago was once murdered for popping, I know that much. So at least start with the ringleader.

actually I am glad I can’t use that, as it is fairly lame and poorly realized, and as much as it’s blippi’s fault I can’t use it, it’s also blippi’s fault I wrote it.


I KNOW it isn’t my fault! Just tell me WHAT went wrong instead of whimpering at me.


1930s technology is apparently more reliable. I would rather my niece watched old Popeye cartoons than Blippi; these are more realistic depictions of actions and consequences. None of those shallow twenty first century values of phony smiling fake-kindness, conflict avoidance and ultra polished blemish free cowering-from-controversy garbage

You know what, I’m busy, I have to get ready to not have thanksgiving.

I actually wrote about these cartoons over a year ago but since they are apparently rightfully unpopular they never came into my business again after the first time and I forgot they existed and didn’t finish.



November 18, 2020
Another woman wearing a blue T-shirt stands by, yelling obscenities to people in the store for unknown reasons.


This is SMART living because you would be a FOOL to pass up a chance to own a GOLD pumpkin

These must be the only three people who could beat him up. The emasculated quivering coward begging for quarter that only WE knew. Or maybe they are just more familiar with the beardless version shown here, which admittedly I am not.

He looks like he is fed up with people prank calling his office and asking for Matt Damon

Before this goes any further i need you to understand that vegetables most certainly canNOT beans.

Not in AMERICA, anyway. go to europe if you intend to engage in that sort of hedonistic rubbish.

You know what, go wherever you want, just go away from me.


the best thing about a world wide pandemic isn’t political parties making ignoring safety precautions a left or right-wing issue, it is definitely there being no clear end to the thing so that corporations have plenty of time to mass-produce smirky merchandise that just accept pandemic life is a given and here to stay. I expect these are produced by workers only kept about six inches apart.


i realize this is the future and I am not supposed to laugh at people with impairments anymore but I am going to laugh at Mighty Sight anyway. oh haha.

I just indicated it is improper to laugh at impairments, but that doesn’t mean you should be PROUD of not having ears. And it seems shortsighted, though mercifully not eyeless, as this creature doesn’t have limbs either!
but I am idding of course; seen from the front this whatever-this-is actually says “FEARLESS,” which makes even less sense since lacking ears, arms and your entire lower body is a valid plight to fear. If I assume this is just meant to be representative of the full-bodied character in its original feature Frozen film context it still doesn’t make sense, as much of the plot of the film is a consequence of this character being totally afraid. First of turning people into ice, and then being afraid of having turned everything else into ice instead, and then the writers were afraid of making this insanely marketable character into an actual villain, and so rolled some dice to arbitrarily assign “villain” to another character with almost no development 75% of the way through the film, even though he never created a giant evil snow monster out of nothing and tried to kill his own sister with it, or worse, another smaller snow monster that is voiced by patron saint of shrill mediocrity Josh Gad thereby transforming him into an inescapable, insufferable media presence after this film grossed over a billion dollars, and then pre-emptively ruining the first movie Rick Moranis agreed to appear in after almost 25 years grape grimpity.


hey look it’s Terry Bradshaw, that guy from commercials, bad talk shows and SHINGLES. Apparently he also played the American footed ball a long time ago, but is still evidently the most recent marketable nfl player without any major criminal convictions who hasn’t been killed by injuries the league insisted weren’t a big deal or their responsibility whenever the prior statement is proven false. Likewise he probably doesn’t eat chicken nuggets, definitely never did at such a time that he was “prep[aring] for the win,” and appropriate enough isn’t eating any in this picture, but he doesn’t mind if you do! And he doesn’t mind if you don’t since he already got paid.


He never puts any Red Man Chewin Dabacca in his mouth either. Red Man Chewin Dabacca, it’s like taking a big bite of an indigenous person and then spitting it out.



November 7, 2020
Presidents Gerald Ford, Jimmy Carter, George H.W. Bush,[9] and, most recently, Bill Clinton[7] have also been separated from the football. In none of these cases was the integrity of the football breached.

11-16-2020 these have perhaps been among the most surreal three days of my life, and yesterday was definitely the most tiring. but it continues. “because of covid” can be used to justify pretty much any arbitrary delay or disposal of function
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11-15-2020 a lot more of that than i expected! no a proper website piece is not popular. also this house is freezing. the new house shouldn’t be freezing. also today is my mother’s birthday and I have not done anything about that either! and I actually meant to! this is not a good house for doing what I mean to do!
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11-14-2020 i will be probably assisting in loading a truck to finally commence really moving out of this house, after more than six years after the first attempt to sell it. I like to imagine I will feel more in control of my existence once all that is done with, and will do something more useful with it, maybe even with this!
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Why isn’t the LAMEstream media reporting this?


or maybe he meant a parking lot.

no, seriously? he won days ago, dorks. I believe it is in fact quite common for votes to not all be counted for days, but to have so many states without a clear majority which the trailing party cannot mathematically overcome is uncommon, yet still not unprecedented. Media being afraid to project a winner, that is new. Still it was undeniable by yesterday except to career-denialists. As somebody who lives most of my life in denial, I can recognize that!


I don’t see a point to gloating about Biden prevailing since Lindsey Graham and Mitch McConnell got re-elected clean, so them and their ilks can still obstruct progress like always, and Trump is still the president until January 20. Biden isn’t anyone’s first choice, probably not even his, and anyone with high expectations will likely be disappointed. Plus the covid is still out for blood, and all the people who weren’t helping before will continue not helping.



November 2, 2020
Hunkerers urged United States President Dwight Eisenhower and General Secretary of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union Nikita Khrushchev to hunker together to end their differences.[10]


Election day eve update: Joe Biden is still not cool. And less new than ever.
I can believe Biden abused his political position to meddle in a foreign government’s business to get his family money. That’s about the only thing Trump hasn’t abused his position to get, because he spent his entire professional life accumulating wealth through abuse.
I don’t think Biden belongs in this position. I think he was forced upon voters even harder than Hillary Clinton was, long before any campaigns even started. However, I can at least believe some things that he says. I can believe that he wants to improve something, anything.
in 2016 I thought: eh Trump is in, I will see what he does, in this role, and not pre-emptively condemn him and panic over unsubstantiatable rumors. Now I have seen that he dodges responsibility, lies about everything, insults everyone, same as before, and almost worse, is applauded for that. If he has real plans for things that matter, I can’t tell.
the Obama administration before that, while superficially an improvement over its predecessors, failed to end numerous bad Bush-era policies, greatly increased the numbers of drones in combat, couldn’t control the police, installed an incomplete health care system…Trump hasn’t really changed much, if any of that, for the better.
Biden MIGHT be different from Obama, and not necessarily worse. But Trump will be the same as Trump. Nothing he has ever done makes me think he means at all well in his screw ups. So based on that I can prefer one over the other. That is about as much optimism as I can manage! I still wouldn’t vote for either of them, but I will vote for somebody.

gosh the connecticut ballot is worse than I thought this year.



August 21, 2020
In Super Smash Bros. for Nintendo 3DS and Wii U, one of Kirby’s palette swaps resembles Meta Knight without his mask, further implying that Meta Knight may be a Kirby.

however I feel about the actual content of the story [a week ago], the unnecessary, corny, 3D ANIMATED face mask from this New York Times piece has greatly improved my day


WHY does it have to be 3d? WHY does it have to be turning? This reminds me of a “choose your character” screen from a mid-1990s arcade game with “great graphics” except instead of a bold and powerful adventurous figure it is a dumb old piece of fabric with straps on it

I can’t stand it, it looks like it has ears. This might as well be nemitz’s head partial turning and smiling at me and whoever else yet never totally looking away. That should be illegal.


also stupid, you can CLICK ON the mask to make it BIGGER! Just in case you saw it and thought “not corny and unnecessary enough at that size, need bigger!” In fact you can even click quite a distance away from it just to make sure maximum maskimum corniness is accessible to people whose motor skills are less than fine.

And this isn’t the Forklogan-Vanpeeblesworth Dispatch, this is the New York Times,


pardon me TIMES, the same acclaimed news source that proclaimed Miss Bianca to be a veritable minx of a mouse, which a book publisher then thought worth putting on a book cover above its title, so they mean business.


Also, this was among numerous books in boxes that I took from my attic to my garage in 2014 trying to clear space, not realizing everything in the garage would become trash by virtue of being in the garage, yet this quote was preserved, while the title was not, when I got to disposing of the books on the same day as the 3d mask came to me so it is only logical to assume there is a deep metaphysical connection. And now it is deep messed-a-physically within a dumpster, beneath surprisingly few dopes.



June 3, 2020
Austin Police arrested the woman for aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. In addition to the cheese grater, she also wielded a knife, police said.


a twitter-inspired image, not a judgement so much as an observation. from sunday, before “black out tuesday” during which numerous people posted pictures of black squares to show their belief that black lives matter and/or to stage a Kazimir Malevich-inspired art exhibit.


Combating white supremacists with white suprematists is certainly an approach I would not have considered.
my intent is not to judge anyone for not wanting to be an activist; not every person posting is in the united states and we’ve seen riots before, but the dichotomy is bizarre. I don’t think posting hashtags, saying you “stand with” someone or “going silent” accomplishes anything important, but if it helps some people feel like they are part of something positive, and maybe some even get a legitimate positive feeling out of it, that is good, right? I know that I wouldn’t, I would feel like a silly person being led by a force I don’t understand or necessarily have the means to identify or trust so I don’t. I tried doing that for a few years trying to please internet activist sorts that I knew and I wasn’t good at it, I didn’t like trying to do something I wasn’t good at for no real reason, and I don’t know any of those people now.

as implied, I have encountered NUMEROUS videos of police clobbering people in the street with seemingly no provocation. and mixed in with them are occasional videos of non-police doing awful things. I think there is nothing noble about ganging up on people even if they came looking for a fight. The goal of these protests, ultimately, is to reduce police violence, and ANYTHING counter to that empowers sorts who advocate more brutal policing, and they’re forever seeking to be. I see far more of the “bad police” videos but as long as there are a few “bad non-police” videos the people who fixate on THAT angle won’t acknowledge any other type. I remember a few years ago when it was trendy to say and sell shoddy merchandise branded with “punch a nazi!” But they aren’t exactly wearing swastika armbands and executing minorities in public, and if you do punch somebody who displays mildly nazi-like tendencies, and it is RECORDED, bet on any context being edited out so you look like you are against free speech. Of course if such a person punches you first the video will be labeled as justified by the same people who would criticize you for punching first but it won’t be at risk of changing anyone’s mind.

I think it is valid to point out that USAmerica’s thuggish law enforcement did not start with Trump, but he is held up by many supporters as a Obama/Clinton antithesis despite seeming to double down on and enjoy their worst traits. His “virtue” is his emotional honesty and no other kind. He tells you he is going to send soldiers to clear protesters, and by bolly he does it, and doesn’t pretend that he wishes he didn’t. It is as refreshing as getting sprayed in the face with lachrymator agents can be.


And if you’re going to loot a place, you are considered a criminal whatever the case, so go to a best buy and take something that you couldn’t buy legally for less than the cost of a doughnut
if you are seriously considering robbing a dollar store please just look for a vending machine to beat up instead.

dollar tree supposedly took $22 billion in revenue in 2017 and has over fifteen thousand stores, so they can handle being burgled, but it isn’t time well-spent and the individual employees aren’t getting paid enough to deal with that.

THAT sentiment, in the blue text, though not the exact wording, was from Thursday may 28, before somebody who I knew five years who had not engaged with me previously on that topic or really any other recently responded “people are getting murdered” and was done with me without any further discussion. Nothing like “hey person I’ve known for half a decade, traded art and had prolonged conversations with, I think this joke is tasteless. Are you unaware of how serious this situation is? Are you getting news from an automated aggregator of websites that are slow to update and may have agendas rather than righteous retweet chains? Perhaps I can provide you with insight that you lack.” I may still be dwelling on it. That doesn’t mean I think I am oppressed now, but I also don’t believe that attitude, turning on anyone who isn’t as dedicated to saying all the “right” things as you are helps anybody, and it’s impossible to know which tragic world events that affect other world events are bad enough to temporarily get fun outlawed and which, like the by now regular mass shootings and unprecedented natural disasters, aren’t. the fact is that nobody can know and care about everything, and nobody does, and anyone who acts like they do is full of beans and only does it when instructed to do so by “influencers” as they are now called who I couldn’t possibly keep track of unless I spent every day doing that and I won’t. I think communication should precede condemnation if the possibility exists.
Perhaps this is new because the murder was filmed and unmistakable. Alright but if anyone is awful now they (or I) didn’t just abruptly become that way because the dominant public sentiment suddenly shifted.

and then yesterday June 2 a 77 year old retired police captain David Dorn trying to help out his friend who owned a pawn shop by checking on the place was murdered by a looter stealing a television set. and I wondered: would a thief who was willing to shoot someone dead robbing a best buy be less likely to face opposition if they had robbed a dollar tree? Which is a ludicrous thing for me to wonder since I am not responsible for the action of someone who was willing to kill anyway unless I have advance access to that person plus awareness of that intent. And I didn’t! A joke in bad taste does not make a person bad. I also think back to a “few” years ago when I was angry at somebody for supporting an artist who, to seem cool, presumably, espoused nazi-flavored antagonism. This is not the same thing. I am not setting out to rile people up and then pretending I wasn’t usually.

here is a theological question that not enough people are asking.


this may raise even more



January 31, 2020
My first WAD. Designed for single player mode with some nice surprises in it. Up until you get the red key it has a strange resemblance to where I work. In fact that Baron seems to be in my bosses office ;)


this may be the lamest billboard i have seen that isn’t for cracker barrel. i object to the phrase “like a boss.” it is a phrase I almost exclusively encounter in advertisements that are trying to seem hip and happenin’, like memes, except memes at least tend to have some scrap of organic origin. it is a phrase created as a joke but was used seriously by people who are so desperate to mimic what they encounter that they didn’t know it was supposed to be a joke. Which is common, in culture, plenty of things end up having opposite meanings better known than their original meanings. And it still HAPPENS in an age where you can look up anything easily because people are too lazy to do that. If you make a task easier, people will find a way to lower their standards so that it becomes difficult.

this wants you to use “pdf” as a verb because people who aren’t me use google as a verb. but telling a computer to look something up for you is empowering (even if as I indicated most people won’t bother), and just the sort of thing a boss might do. Bosses do not make pdfs. Bosses order other people to make pdfs. Because making pdfs is dull.

pdfing like a boss is as cool as cooking food in a

ninjar fooditm. Or in a foodi™ from anyone at all or anything at all from a company in Massachusetts that thinks it gets to call itself ninja and put an ® after it and then sell tools which mundane tasks are done with. I reckon soon we can expect to see the Necromancer “Necri” Desklamp and the T-Rex Assassin Graphing Calculator and the Shark Vaccuum Cleaner

oh well that makes sense i suppose.
I ought to consider that the actual original ninjas killed using farm tools, and pressure cookers have been used as bombs in several terrorist attacks. I don’t know why SharkNinja Operating LLC does not put that in its advertising. From the people who brought you the Jeffrey Dahmer Fag-Reducing Grilling Machine it’s the Ninjihad IEatD! Saves time, not infidels.

Back to my initial objections, the attempted glorification of the pdf format: It is annoying to use, annoying to browse, the file sizes are bloated, and most importantly the format is proprietary. swf, flash animation, is also stuck in the 1990s and loaded with bugs but at least THAT has a unique purpose that no alternative has been proposed for, and that is being forcibly phased out. yet pdf gets to reference irritating forced memes by the side of the road while implying that mundane busy work is cool. No it isn’t. Ads don’t get to say something is “awesome.” Maybe a person in a job that calls for lots of pdf creation can come up with ways to make it fun, but, first of all, I doubt it, and if the ad says it is than it isn’t anyway.

this is the sort of thing that I am supposed to “let [it] go” and I don’t dwell on it, but in the moment when I see it, all these thoughts go into me at once. This thing instantly bothers me for a whole land of reasons. Ads aren’t cool, people in ads aren’t cool, acts advocated by ads aren’t cool. Nothing that you pay to impose on others is or can be. It got MY attention right, it did its job, right? No I am never going to pay adobe for a pdf creator. I have other ways of making them if I need to and I don’t need to because it is a stupid format. One print store tried to charge me a ludicrous undisclosed per-file fee because my pictures were all separate instead of in one pdf and I just didn’t buy from them that day or ever go back there because those people are scum. Anyone who won’t tell you what their product costs until after you have ordered it is scum because they know what it costs and they could easily publicize it but don’t because they know it is too much and can only get sales by trying to trick and trap people.


on twitter promoted twits are visible for a split second before my ad-blocker smites them. I used to be able to block the entire “trends” box and that was preferable, but now I can’t so I just set it to a language that i cannot read.
Like a boss promoted BY like a boss. I don’t want to know i don’t don’t don’t don’t. Presumably this was somebody’s boss’s idea. This [was in December] the first i learned of it and ideally will be the last i learned of it (it wasn’t; i saw it in the same space a month later). I would not say I am happier cut off from the dominant culture but i definitely get angry-depressed less often. I am more stable. I wondered if once I was beyond the age of the target demographic I would actually start getting appealed to, since i statistically no longer mattered, but that did not occur, and i simply obtained awareness that I was never going to matter.
and it says “nsfw” which means “not safe for work,” like if you have a job. but any job that you are watching stupid promoted movie trailers during is a job you should be fired from, presumably by someone like your boss.

I think you should also be fired if you do anything “tumsworthy,” even if you work for the GlaxoSmithKline company. I think you the whole company should be fired for making its name all one word but still capitalizing the S and K. Also for pushing unapproved drugs on to physicians and only being punished with a 3 billion dollar fine that sounds substantial but is less than a tenth of its annual profit. And they are only the SEVENTH-largest pharmaceutical company! They get the money, we get the pills to distract us from the misery of all the money we spent on pills and then more pills to distract us from the fact that the first pills probably made us worse.


one does what one must.



December 24, 2019
Like her sister Barbie, she has had numerous “acquaintances”, celebrity friends, fantasy friends, and Disney friends that were produced at her size.

I am almost sad the “cats” movie is flopping so hard since I was looking forward to getting angry at it not doing that.
cats is my least favorite musical work by somebody who I think has actual musical talent. Everything about it was annoying even before Rebel Wilson had a role in it.

my stance on cats is a matter of public record, but I will repeat it anyway because I’m sick, i need help.

Starlight Express is the gayest ostensibly heterosexual love story I have ever seen. Although to be fair I haven’t tried to watch Cats yet.

I have now listened to the “Cats” album in full and wish to apologize to Lord Andrew Webster for implying that it has a story.

And I wish also to apologize to Jonathan Larson 20 years after his death for ever saying Rent was the most annoying musical.

Cats is like if every song in Rent was sung-chanted by Angel and had nothing to do with the song before it.

Cats are like THIS! And cats do THAT! That’s how life IS if you’re a CAT!

I was embarrassed that I liked starlight express, overall, at times, but maybe I shouldn’t be since cats gets loads more respect.

I think Starlight Express was made specifically for people who like really stupid stage musicals but didn’t like Cats for why-ever

And also to help Andy Lloyd Lloyder replenish his stock of gold embroidered toilet paper.

I spread my “Chess” obsession across a few years but I want to try and get Starlight Express out of my system within the week.

I do not know what long-term psychological damage dwelling on it might be capable of.

I think Andy Pandy Webby is a substantially better composer than Stephen Sondheim, on account of his music actually having discernible tunes. If Webbo is guilty of plagiarism at least he picks good targets. But there is a reason Jesus Christ Superstar got made into a movie almost immediately and Cats took almost my entire lifetime, apart from one being a god story and the other a there is no god story. Which reminds me, christmas is tomorrow!


Gosh it’s finally here I can’t wait

I drew the sketch in 2016 during a particularly regrettable period in my life and forgot about it, then last year my younger brother was going to appear at some sort of comedy event where Artie Lange was also going to appear, so i colored and purged the uncanny valley from it in anticipation of promoting the event with this, but then the brother dropped for a reason that I wouldn’t have because gosh if somebody is PAYING me to do what i ASPIRE to do and I was sharing a venue with somebody else who made a career out of it why would I not, that would get me more respect than drawing dopey fursonas ever has, and I suddenly had no excuse to justify bringing it up again and I forgot it again. unfortunately, i remembered.
ALSO it seems that in 2017 Lange had a series of incidents which among other things have rendered his nose in a state that makes it seem perpetually pressed against a plate of glass, so as barely recognizable as this drawing was it is now quite less so, and then I suppose already had been at the time when I meant to show it. I only learned that today when debating whether to tag him in the post on instagram. I decided not to because I wanted to tag both of them and if the other guy has an instagram page it didn’t come up fast enough for me to not start getting nauseated at other people’s posts mentioning him and great bimpity frimpity look at this dumb garbage who cares it isn’t worth that much anxiety.

In other Lindy news he recently appeared without my being prepared for it in the HBO series “his dark materials,” where he portrays the character Lee Scoresby, who gets into fistfights and shoots monsters with a gun and is utterly unconvincing, and apart from that is incredibly distracting being a ubiquitous media celebrity in an ostensibly fantasy setting but fortunately only in half the episodes and not the only thing wrong with the program. One of which is uncertainty as to whom the titular “his” refers. The quantity of luminance in his materials is not a factor in my distaste for them, apart from maybe I would like his stupid beard better if it were invisible.

My opinion of whose-ever dark materials is also a matter of public record, but unlike “cats” was actually topical when I talked about it and I still couldn’t even manage a single meager “like” so there is less need to assume that was just because nobody saw the posts because I am sure someone did. if you look up related hash tags all the posts are just people who are already fans of that guy talking about how great he is on the show even though, as noted, he is usually NOT on the show and detrimental when he is. that’s probably WHY he was cast; he brings along an existing set of fans who aren’t very discerning. I am supposed to accept him as a surrogate father figure for the main character Lyra even though they hardly have any screen time together and when they do Lee is whining about having to work or demanding to be paid, which could be funny if he was funny but he isn’t. Lee Scoresby has about as much warmth as the equally nasally Enoch “Nucky” Thompson from the earlier hbo series Boardwalk Empire, which apparently loads of people watched when it was new, just nobody who I know or who knows me.
That comparison seems like a compliment since Enoch is portrayed by Steve Buscemi who a lot of people also like but Enoch is an unscrupulous gangster rather than a roguish ne’erdowell with a heart of gold.


this is a different character, i suppose it isn’t terribly important whom and that may work in my favor since the valley of uncanniness I mentioned earlier is less of a factor when you don’t know who a picture is SUPPOSED to look like.
yes I have hbo now, I am up to date on the premium channel shows that I for years resented The Media treating like everybody watched and kept up with back when i couldn’t, and now I don’t have regular cable and it is better, and apparently loads of people also are only using premium streaming television now rather than conventional broadcast services, and once again we still have no idea what each other are talking about.

but this is christmas, right? I should do something nice for someone. tying up old mental baggage so I don’t talk about it where other people can hear it is a gooder deed than I typically manage.



August 20, 2019
Bio-duck is the nickname given to a mysterious quacking-like sound which was first reported in the open ocean by submarines in the 1960s

These are all magazines I saw at the same store, Big Y in north branford connecticut, on the same day, august 14 2019. except for one that I had a pre-existing but unposted complaint about that this reminded me of.


Robin Williams five years later: still dead, still having his death exploited by people with no lives. Pardon me, too soon? I admit I only saw this magazine a week ago.

Is ten years too soon to say that Patrick Swayze had as much impact on my life as I did on his?

Hey how about 1999? Remember when one person got dead that year? Someone who was only famous because his father was also dead?


or how about the time that- what? I didn’t even know Farrah Fawcett was dead. I suppose this does serve a purpose. However you aren’t doing a very good job remembering “the Beloved Charlie’s Angels Star” if you forget that she quit that show after one season and spent the rest of her life trying to not be remembered as its star. Also: this and the one before it have both been placed beside the same issue of


National Examiner, ALSO obsessed with a death that happened ages ago but I forgive them for that because The Tabloids never stopped touching themselves while thinking about Diana’s death for a minute. That’s the closest they come to journalistic integrity. Call it monogamy if you want.

and just over to the right: Hey Daniel Ratcliff isn’t doing any more Harry Potter movies. Seems like a good time to put him on the cover in that costume and run a story on this like it’s new.

hey remember when you could only watch tv shows when tv channels said you could? Wasn’t that great? Do you remember when you couldn’t even find out what programs were going to be broadcast and when unless you bought a separate little book just for that? No probably not since studies have shown I am the oldest person on the internet.

if you are like me (as I already established you aren’t) you barely remember the early 1990s and never sought out any of these idiots on purpose but saw them on your television incessantly anyway so that perhaps you believed they appeared on the same program called 9021OJ in which every one of those bleached smiling scumbags in that pile get murdered. These magazines are here and separate to set you straight and possibly no other reason.

I actually did like the Naked Gun Movies in which Mr. J appeared, and since I do remember that, no magazines are necessary.


speaking of no reason, why celebrate the thirty-fifth anniversary of these movies when it is also the thirtieth anniversary of movies from 1989 and more importantly the twenty-fifth anniversary of movies from 1994 and yet more importantly totally pointless? Unless the critics are actually being CRITICAL of movies that made loads of money and have inarguable legacies there is nothing new to say here and they could just reprint what they probably ran ten years ago. maybe they did. George Orwell’s concept of 1984 society using thought control to keep people in their places greatly over-estimated how much effort that would require.
i tried to watch indiana jones and the temple of doom, just incidentally, a few weeks ago. It is a really stupid movie! Loaded with stereotypes, improbable mercy from adversaries shown none and Harrison Ford making even less effort to be likeable than Bill Murray in Ghostbusters, without two partners of equal rank to balance that out. But i appreciate that it gets fight to the point and doesn’t waste time trying to pretend it is a smart movie. I sure wouldn’t want to read a magazine article about it NOW.


hey how about some dead bands? Look it is even in their name! And by gamera they are GRATEFUL to be mentioned at all. You know the only thing I like better than hearing music from the same singers and same instruments for hours simply because somebody else told me the band is great-filled is READING about it.


how about some dead decades? the 1960s: the only time anything ever happened. That was a decade that changed a nation. How many of them can claim that? That is why so many countries seem like they are stuck in other centuries; only one of them can change every ten years, and luckily this one got its one chance five of that ago.
magazines tend to agree on this. they will place 90% of the greatest songs OF ALL TIME, that being all sound created by all beings in the history of the universe, all of which having been heard and equally evaluated, into this decade* via

The Man’s 500 most acceptable mainstream vocal English-language songs of the middle scrap of one century issue. What a shock that the one their magazine is named after tops the list and a band with the same name dominates it otherwise. They would have me believe “the times” are “a-changin'” when their musical taste was chiseled into granite around the same time my mother was born (presumably a coincidence). Luckily Rolling Stone Magazine is not generally stocked by the checkout aisles as Big Y World Class Markets or else I would have to write a version of this web page once a month rather than every two months.

*that figure was a cynical guess; statistically it is apparently only 40%, but the closer you get to the top of the list the closer it comes to that, with 9 of the top 10 coming out within a 12 year period that includes the 1960s.

additionally:

History Channel Magazine ALREADY had a Beatles issue THIS YEAR. Do you know how much history there IS? All the history in HISTORY. And the magazine named after it can’t find enough in five months to not have to go into reruns.

i suppose in a media format that is dying out you stay in business by reminding people of times when more people bought magazines. Because when those times actually do a-change, expectations a-do as well, which a-is not good for business. Achoo! This may seem to contradict the adage of those who forget the past being doomed to repeat it, but consider that this may itself be the doom prescribed. This is what we get for for getting.

Oh this is too much. I need to think about something else.

Dead civilizations! My favorite!

////////////////////////////////////


addendoy: i had to take the pictures in the store somewhat hurriedly so the details were not all clear and I did not realize that the lower two sections are showing different pictures. Some dorky band and touching a rock in space are evidently not just more important, but substantially so than the civil rights movement and one of United Statia’s worst wars. I could definitely claim there was a racial angle to this if I could do so without screwing it up.



July 9, 2019
Donald Duck is a white duck that wears blue clothes that usually appears in Mickey Mouse. He is considered one of Mickey’s friends. He kind of has a lisp, but it is not like Daffy Duck’s.

welcome to disney world














on second thought let us not go to disney world. I am not obligated to provide a reason.

Sea World is more to my liking, anyhow.










That’s enough, I’m outta here.



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