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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
September 11, 2019
“A crazy person can’t do all this,” he said. “A crazy person can’t make this floating stage.”


I prepared all the pages for the [proof copy] of the next comic book and sent away for the proof print. I do not consider the work finished and probably will not have time to make a full order for the November 2 + 3 art show, even if i do inexplicably finish by the time the proof print comes and I do not find anything with it that is wrong beyond what I continued to poke at meanwhile, but at least for the time being if something goes wrong it might not necessarily be my fault. Additionally I have updated all posted pages with my 3 months of changes and they can be viewed from this point onward.
Regarding that up there, it initially started the chapter, but I thought it was more “professional” to start the chapter with a view of scenery, and also establish kumquat and pog’s presence. Also, I like the idea of the comic strip having no narration whatsoever, but i also MADE this dumb thing and have always had it between the end of one part and the start of another, even though at THAT time, part one was in a state of disarray and the whole point of my redrawing all that was to render further explanation of what it shows unnecessary. However, obsessive compulsion states I must include it if I am able, and so for now I am doing so.
Kumquat still looks awkward, but the other three characters look slightly better. Elpse no longer has fish whisker things protruding from its face nor stripes on its thigh regions. I LIKE those details, but if I have them here, then I risk forcing myself to include them everywhere else like I did after I added little zigzag stripes next to its feet and hand areas. Also, nemitz is still a crumbag. THAT would be truly impossible to fix in time to get the books printed.
This is only a half page, but i used the second half to cram in my various website urls. Of course I still have people asking if I have a website while looking straight at my business cards that only exist to show urls for my 500 different websites, so this may be irrelevant. Yes so I have tentatively placed this on the inside front cover. I will of course scrutinize that text’s legibility. I do not yet have something for the back cover or a preview of the next issue’s front cover for this one’s inside back cover. I have a lot of cover left to cover.



September 5, 2019
he is arrogant due to his unbelievable inheritance

In may I offered “100 free sketches” at the twittor website in a completely misguided and cynical attempt to expand my audience, not considering that I might end up with an audience full of expansion fetishists, or that I do my best work with no audience.
it “worked,” but only when I put in considerably more effort than i expected to, and of course only when drawing other people’s characters and noncepts. Not helping were folks who gave such information that there would be no potentially satisfactory way to draw what they wanted that could be at all simple, but only a few of them seemed so entitled that they were absolutely depending on me to do so, and so as usual the fault was mine for assuming it would be easy and doing it anyway, even though never once has something been easy when it seemed like it would be. To help disperse the blame, I inserted less reputable creatures into some of the images that I might complain about instead, and those will be appearing here.


free sketch #11, for https://twitter.com/lazy__lucy! a moth person whose eyes in fact always have heart shapes in them, even when not approaching a desirable destination.
I meant to draw a fork and knife both wearing little bowties beside the plate but thankfully did not do so. I believe I outlined their shapes and then didn’t notice I was drawing over them when adding the table cloth and then forgot they had been present. I also did not notice that the bowtie meep on this occasion lacks arms and perhaps both of these things are evidence of order in the universe.


free sketch #14, https://twitter.com/WhiteDahlia_ , time traveling assassin spy, tracks down the leader of a mysterious but most assuredly nefarious organization. I presume it is not actually missing an eye but since it has both eyes closed when it is feeling particularly proud of itself and it never isn’t, eyesight gradually becomes irrelevant.


free sketch #27 for https://twitter.com/IanKeith ! Phaeux helps nemitz have a good time on the swing set

free sketch #?, https://twitter.com/HeathenHeanow/ (who actually draws better than i do)’s character, also named heathen, bestows upon nemitz the order of the banana and birthday cake-flavored ice cream with sprinkles. nemitz reacts with mits usual ingratitudinal demeanor.


free sketch #28! https://twitter.com/TheAusSpideyGuy s character Leonardo knows that the best thing about having six arms is being able to pull rabbits out of three hats at once, although sometimes it is difficult to find three rabbits to participate in your routine on short notice.
pog was never meant to have anything in common with a rabbit visually and I never considered that there might be a resemblance until people started calling pog a “rabbit,” including the tip-soliciting lady who gives out animal shape balloons at a local restaurant who thought it really necessary to ask my 4.9-year old niece if she could find “the bunny,” referring to pog, on the sketchbook page I wasn’t finished with or actually exhibiting after mis-indentifying the actual rabbit i drew as a moose, though admittedly I had put a stupid helmet on it. Which happened last week even though this picture is from a month ago but it seemed relevant. Therefore pog seemed a natural reluctant choice for this role.

The person also thought my drawing of the sprite from secret of mana was a horse. Which is probably why I did so few ACTUAL sketches for this.


free sketch #36 https://twitter.com/DraygoDraygon ‘s character also named Draygo sees to it that nemitz gets squashed. nemitz feigns ignorance as to why this may have been necessary.

ree sketch #38: twitter.com/SpecstheFox and nemitz go sailing together. you might think it impressive that dumb old nemitz was able to rig the sail but nemitz probably bribed somebody else to do it in payments of stolen beans. (the captain hat is also stolen)


free “sketch” #45! https://twitter.com/CuntyMcPunty ‘s character Silver aids the cause of justice. rather than a specific content suggestion i was instructed to “go wild,” which in my case means “go stupid.” It might have been more appropriate for me to say: I don’t know you, you don’t even watch my page, and I don’t particularly want your name to appear on mine, and so I don’t see any reason to go anything on your behalf, but i did anyway because I am sick and I need help.


free sketch #¿ for https://www.deviantart.com/artificial-demon ! Acid Goblin hacks nemitz’s computer.

That is of course only the monitor but nemitz is ignorant and probably thinks that part is the computer.
nemitz should not even HAVE a computer. mit probably just looks up pictures of beans on pinterest.


aksi: here is the actual original sketch that I used to advertise what I was doing. I think only three that I delivered were actually of this level of quality. I figured I could chank out ten of these a day, forgetting that nemitz in a basic moron pose is really easy to draw and that I hold myself to a much higher standard when drawing things that I want other people acknowledge the existence of. Nemitz deserved to be promptly forgotten once mit is crushed by that tree.

and a “raffle” is when somebody demands that you share their post and watch their page for a chance that you MIGHT get something for free. I think it is despicable. And so not only did I commit myself to much more work, I necessarily capped the free advertising I could get from it on account of my committing to granting something to every participant but only a set number of them. Does that all make sense? It shouldn’t! Also the nature of this sort of thing meant that most of the people who did participate were sickos who just like the idea of getting stuff, not much caring what it is or who it is from. And I could tell because when I checked their pages to make sure they had retwutted my post before making a request of me there were often already 6 fresh raffle retweets above mine. And of course a few of them didn’t do it at all.
Or they will have extremely niche, stupid tastes that I can’t even talk about with explaining and making myself seem insane just for having been directly in contact with, and only share the offer with other people who are even deeper in the same dumb niche, and then blambi, I have to draw a whole bunch of 8 limbed inflatable monstrosities being force-fed after being flattened by steam rollers. You know, stuff normal people like.
By this point I have finished about 56 of them, which is roughly half because I kept letting people sign up after I closed the thing. Even though decent people would probably honor my set total and not ask to be let in after I had closed it. I wouldn’t let nemitz get away with that! Or I would certainly sternly and directly rebuke nemitz instead of talking indirect trash about mit on another website. It wouldn’t be professional to talk to fictional characters on my website in an insincere manner.



August 28, 2019
Fire-up your warp rattler and prepare to blast off into enemy space

The job is yet incomplete but I believe I will be concluding book 3 at page 2-35. On the website I have that section as ending with 2-39, but then that only leaves 22 pages for the next book. This change leaves it with 26 which still seems low but there is at least one, possibly two new pages that I will insert to show the gwakpazirs/”urkel spheres” again and also the kaklabesk creature which I made such a problem for myself over trying to explain on the most recent new pages despite it only having appeared on one page prior then. But if it is on TWO earlier pages, THEN my time was well spent! Some of the gnome pages are too bunched up, also, so I can definitely push that up to 30 pages. With the remaining pages I can make some origami pterodactyls.


2-55 is particularly messy, even if as a work of spatially-efficient visual art I was particularly pleased with that when I first constructed it. That was the first page were there were conspicuously non-rectangular panels. But I suppose rectangles are preferable to wrecked angles. The dope getting beaten up is worth presenting in a coherent manner.
I included that picture just in case once i DO sort that out I forget to return to this and correct the link. Right now my right arm hurts because I tried way too hard to scrub a toilet today and I want to minimize excess fiddling on this website entry but I must think about my legacy. Fortunately I do not use a leg to scrub toilets.


Additionally I notice a shift in the artwork at 2-30ish, especially once namitz and elpse leave the hospitarium, to a lot more cross-hatching, although somewhat more orderly than earlier stabs at it, though with duller coloring. I was surprised that the last few I have been working over required surprisingly little art editing, compared to the previous two books anyway, beyond the difficulties I already alluded to. The editing at THIS point is tedious but not difficult. I seemed to reach a level of stability roundabout 2-21 in which I had just enough real ink and inexplicably coherent backgrounds despite a large amount of straight lines and inorganic details that don’t change between panels, and then I lost it again once nemitz started wandering around screwing things up. And so to edit further pages will require a different “rhythm” than i had developed. Nemitz thought it could stop me, but stopping me there allows me to continue elsewhere! I would thank nemitz but I would never thank nemitz.



August 13, 2019
The game is set on Timber’s Island and revolves around Diddy Kong and his friends’ attempt to defeat the intergalactic antagonist, a wizarding pig named Wizpig, through winning a series of races.



this is the dominant project of the moment. Trying to make awkward comic strip pages from ten years ago look slightly less awkward by surgically extracting as much of the rigidity, bad mouse-done “ink”work and bad anatomy out of them as is feasible by some arbitrary point that is likely still too late to get new books printed by when I want to have them. My anatomical rendering skill and general awareness are still terrible but I am considerably less likely now to commit to a weird guess. This example shows some unusually bad dialog flow, which is why I chose it, even though it is not one of the problems I cited. This is also a problem! There is no sense in mentioning it twice!

Ostensibly it should not be that hard but there are a few hundred drawings in here, if i estimate 13 panels per page and 30 pages it comes to 390 which is likely a bit low. Also I “have” to separate the panel boundaries and word baubles –in the event it isn’t necessary to rewrite the text entirely, which is frequently the case with elpse, or redraw the bauble shape, which I do for pog and nemitz since I decided that less serious characters have less serious bauble shapes after this point– to maximize my ability to correct awkwardness on them, which is also a bigger job than it would be to a reasonable person. In 2009 I obsessive compulsively used hard black for all outlines and more shading than was called for, so getting the components separated is tedious but necessary for reasons too tedious for me to explain. what it amounts to is that I have a heirarchy of sicknesses and in order to live with the chief sickness I must endure some less prodigious sicknesses that both necessitate that I do strange needless work and that I do the work very strangely, to a needless degree. A long time ago I was proud of the fact that I could arrange and complete these things all on one digital layer. Also of using pure black for all outlines and text. Now I definitely wish I had not been so insistent on those things!



Why did i think it was a good idea to use solid line shading on skin? I imagined it would blend into a smooth grey but in the end it looks like a bunch of scratches. It looks good on wood. I felt so empowered to be using real ink from real pens at that I thought it could solve all of my problems! It looks better than my bad mouse pretend ink but then I kept adding more and more of it so it was still a mess. page 20 has some particularly bad examples but I have not gotten to altering that one yet! But I “need” to make a website update today so this is that.



February 17, 2019
Gilbert’s name is a pseudonym, one he used to pen a furry erotic novel, The Furred Reich, about a young Nazi officer’s encounter with an anthropomorphic female snow leopard. He keeps his fursona a secret to allow him to attend furry conventions without getting banned, punched in the face or both.

nemitz is no stranger to hugging, despite being strange


this from 2004, a far off period before the mediocre expectations of internet communities beat my creativity out of me but also before i could draw. nonetheless i did it with colored pencils, which when digitally scanned gave the drawing the unearthly quality of the blank paper actually being darker than the marks on it, so i just today artificially augmented the ghastily large eye-balls to look less grey. I miraculously resisted the urge to alter innumerable other components of the image.
ah yes and the image title is Unlawful Restraint. Don’t forget. nemitz is a fugitive from justice.


Also there is this, Imminent Self-Defense, from 2010, of colored pencil PLUS expensive prisma color markers, since internet people led me to think those would be crucial for functioning, right around the time they all switched to yet more expensive copic markers. It shows the creature Eliah, known to a person called, at the time, Science Fox, and I know not what these days, being physically assaulted by the scoundrel nemitz.


Hugly Situation, from merely 2011, in which Astro Q Duck (the Q stands for “Questionable”) and a terrible creature known only as nemitz reunite after, I assume, being exiled from every place in existence.


Fuzzcilities: not very long ago there was a Valentine day and I regretfully thought it prudent to check on who nemitz was hugging more recently.
nemitz x toilet, hollywood’s power couple for 2019


You HAVE to hug people who don’t want to be hugged. What a tragic, unfortunate, sad-emoticonable plight! I hate to admit that in seeking out inanimate emoticon depositories maybe nemitz has the right idea, so I won’t.



January 30, 2019
All hell has run amok! Monstrous demons use their gruesome talents to turn your space station into your worst nightmare. Fight black magic with firepower in virtual reality perspective to save your skin!


two elpse-like imps that i drew apparently almost three years ago and two nemitz-types that i possibly but not necessarily also did. The idea was brought about by the person of https://twitter.com/dookingplaza who i suspect also comments on my posts here under the name “charmlatan,” who said
“I wanted to request seeing the two grivvits Elpse was supposed to go on the mission to with their mibrim partners, non-pickled please”

This was to be a hastily done improvised sketch but I only accomplished the improvised part. In the absence of anything else related to this, I drew it slightly better than I perhaps intended to. I got myself stuck redrawing yet more old comic pages, and also everything else in the world I might be doing that gets me nowhere but takes a long time.

i have not thought out the circumstances of elpse’s past circumstances a great amount beyond what I showed there, so this is very possibly a fictional event apart from the base fiction.

I think the yellow creature may be of a third, token minority imp type that does not necessarily have an assigned counterpart, at least of nemitzy origin. nonetheless i drew them in this way, even wearing the same clothing as the other time, since they would barely be recognizable otherwise, even though for all i know the clothing was new at the point shown in the back flashing or at least only recently acquired by those specific creatures and thus even less possible to have been worn when there were still green nemitzes to do stupid things with. And let me be clear that there is no way that something which looks like nemitz is going to do something that is not stupid.

I even just last night decided that pog’s name should be “pwog” or “puag” after 23 years of calling it pog, and maybe ten years of not liking the name but not having a preferable alternative. anything can change, so long as it requires extra work on stuff I made ages ago and makes no real difference.



November 21, 2018
Many mascots have different reasons for boycotting the race. Bladey is a long standing mascot who has the respect of his mascotting colleagues such as Roary The Tiger from Hull, and our own mascot of 13 years Poacher The Imp. However as well as support for Bladey there is also the fear that football mascots might have been exploited just one too many times.


Dear dear dear, NEMITZ is SENSITIVE now. Oh PARDON ME, nemitz. Have i OFFENDED your DELICATE sensibilities??! Have I BESMIRCHED your refined tastes? Get back to work, you anthropomorphic koosh ball.


I am sick of having to do damage control after nemitz’ pity parades. It’s visible to everyone? Too bad, they probably got sick of nemitz’s diva episodes. What’s the matter, nemitz, did pog’s dressing room door have a sparklier star than yours? I heard that on opening night nemitz REFUSED to perform until one of the orchestra members took off a bright green scarf because nemitz thought it was too “distracting.” I heard that during the tuesday night table readings the scripts are always good but then mysteriously when it comes time to shoot the episode on thursday all the best lines have MYSTERIOUSLY gone to nemitz. I can’t stand it. All the contractually secured “creative” control you bullied the network into granting you won’t control public opinion. Get over yourself, dumb mitz. I don’t even want to talk about this anymore.



October 15, 2018
Whoever finds the almond receives a marzipan pig as a prize.[1]

it makes me mad that dumb nemitz got into this picture. don’t you know i am on, possibly over a deadline, you stupid horrid mitz? and you had to get stuck so you need help?! i do not have TIME to help you. Or maybe nemitz is just DISSATISFIED with the chocolate that mit has and is demanding the other imp hand over its doughnut fragment. I appreciate that the other imp is ignoring nemitz’s TOXIC behaviour. Sometimes that is the only way they learn.



August 17, 2018
Its developer, Nihilistic Software, was inspired by the God of War and Ninja Gaiden video games to create an experience featuring gore and nudity.


nemitz strikes it rich with a metal detector. it must be assumed that the metal detector is borrowed or stolen. and also that nemitz will be quite glad to dig that thing up and will offer to split the prize with anybody who helps.
A picture that I liked as a sketch, but could not fill in with enough details that I liked it finished. This contrasts with what usually happens, when I ruin the picture by trying to insert so many details that I overwhelm both the image and myself, though a point could be made about the incredibly large distraction on the lower left. That makes the tiny little distraction on the lower middle right seem too small, and not providing adequate counter-balance. But the nonsense objects I would generally fill space with, such as pine cones and pumpkins are already featured, and at a yet smaller size, on the vending machine’s buttons. Worse still, neither of the allusions inherent in the external objects is organic to me. I played the video game Dig Dug early in my life, but too early in fact to remember what the primary monsters looked like and I never came back to it until now. I had to look up both that thing’s appearance and even how the game works. Additionally, I do not think the Atari 2600 game “E.T. The Last Dinosaur” is any worse or dumber than the average bad atari 2600 game. I inherited a 2600 unit and a collection of game cartridges, including Dig Dug, from my cousins when they obtained a Nintendo Ehhh System. They probably had about the average assortment of games, including Adventure, Missile Command, Mario Bros and whatnot. There were a few that I could not make sense of but that could be attributed to my lack of age and experience at the time. When I got to emulating the 2600 system, however, the complete collection of roms included loads of terrible, obscure games that even as a moderately old person I could hardly figure out. Those likely comprise a majority of what was available for the 2600. ET only differs in that its cartridge was produced in great quantities. But I never had one!
Although I distinctly recall, in the game Pitfall, the character would be destroyed regardless of what point it attempted to jump across the alligators, and people still swear that was a “classic.” And I never found joy enough in emulating 2600 to do it more than once in ten years, and consequently the emulators I have for it don’t even work anymore, and I don’t feel like getting them to work just to provide another illustration for this website update.
I believe it is fair to blame nemitz for all of these things.



December 30, 2017
no pulse, no breath, cold as a cod. yes, thou art truly dead.


a drawing i started absentmindedly while my niece Violet was climbing on me, which limits the range of things I can work on, since Violet may want to bang on buttons or scribble something pink at any moment. This was never at risk of becoming WORSE.
I like to think the lower right one knows what it did to deserve that, but I have been so absentminded lately, I possibly forgot to inform it.
But why must NEMITZ be there, approving? the world does NOT need nemitz approval! Nemitz is also disproportionately larger than the other figures. Classical art analysis would indicate this to mean that nemitz is the most important person in the scene, and I absolutely assure you that is NOT the case, even in a case where nobody is important. In fact, especially so.

This is hardly a great illustration; it is extremely regressive, composition-wise, with all the figures on the same two dimensional plane


but the comic book matter is yet ongoing, continuing to consume much of my not-necessarily-wasted time, and the commissions I do (more than I exhibit here) remain somewhat homogeneous, and so I feel a need to show this thing that asserts I am not the person I look like I am if I only post commissions. People reached the exact same wrong conclusions about me in the past when I only made personally-directed stand-alone “art”work like this, as now when I rarely do, but now I have more of those people reaching. Which is “good” since it means more money and marginally more influence for me, provided I do not express any opinion on anything, which I accomplish by avoiding learning about anything that was made recently unless I have a connection to it which predates social media, such as star wars, or I learn about it off the internet, such as who Aunt Bee hated. I also have to avoid talking about my avoidance and what led to it because I start writing more or less the same manifesto that I have posted here repeatedly since whenever people started using tumblr, and I do not have the energy to make it funny to me anymore. I don’t think it much deserves the help, either!

I assure you this comment is just as weird when not removed from its original context



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
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pc72
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video game music database
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Green Lantern Head Trauma

them`s fightin` woids: September 20, 2019
Frimpinheap sez:
It is certainly possible that the hat gave advice but it probably would not have extended...
September 19, 2019
Purplespace sez:
I had assumed lope was so serious in your original because his hat had been coaching him on...
September 15, 2019
pindohodo sez:
Even if this twitter exercise doesn’t turn out the way you originally wished or...
September 14, 2019
Charmlatan sez:
I enjoy the unexplained inconsistencies moments as well! Please continue those, for...
September 13, 2019
Frimpinheap sez:
but maybe i WON’T because in part three as you likely recall i did establish that...
September 13, 2019
Frimpinheap sez:
I might just add them back before the next print test, and also include the swirl...
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    08/15/03
    Hopeless.swf
    11/24/04, (I can only justify this by calling it an experiment, so I shall)
    sandwich.swf
    02/16/05
    FACK
    ??/??/??
    Poetry Page
    The same