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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
April 2, 2021
it’s a trollll! from the movie, disaneefrozan!

commission drawing for dookingplaza of the twitter website. Which is to say I was given money to make this, which is probably just about the silliest thing to spend money on. Imagine not being able to buy a pizza because you spent that money buying a nemitz instead, truly tragic The elpse is there also but I am more experienced blaming nemitz.

Yes indeed the scene shows this edition of these two suspicious imps resting in this manner in roughly this sort of place.
I seemed to like drawing some of the foliage here. The fooliage however is more difficult to justify.
it is frustrating to see the date on that page and realize I posted it almost five years ago and have only just inched past that section of the “story” in the 36 subsequent pages! However I have in the finished pages and the adequately legible scripted bits sorted out numerous dangling chad “plot” points so theoretically I should be able to move forward more concerned about what is going to happen than what already has, even if my speed and cultural references continue to be two or more decades behind.
I forgot to include elpse’s rope belt, but even after I noticed it I forgot it again, and Mr. Plaza didn’t seem to notice it either so it might not be important, at least not to those who are not elpse. Ordinarily I find rope belts funny and it is possible this scene was not supposed to be funny so it might be best not included anyway, apart from sparing you the unspeakable boredom of reading about how I forgot it.



March 28, 2021
I said, ‘How do I know I want to be Batman’s butler?’ It was the most ridiculous thing I had ever heard of. He said, ‘It may be worth over $100,000.’ So I said I was Batman’s butler.


I got this back in fourth grade, which was probably roundabout 1993, from a school book fair or something because I would buy ANY book of comic strips that appeared in a weird place, and the character looked sort of like Calvin of “and Hobbes” fame anyway, and I had all the books with actual Calvin in them. I had never seen this big Nate that is smaller than a pencil before and have not seen it since,

but apparently it found an audience somewhere eventually among influential scumbags.
I don’t know how you make a tv series about a kid who draws comic strips in his note books, or why you need to save money by making it 3d since it would probably cost 2 cents to animate the notebook sections, which easily comprised about a third of the natebook that I had, assuming the tv series doesn’t just opt for static images.

I still had the book, along with this from the same book fair, a large hard cover edition of Roald Dahl’s The Minpins, which wasn’t actually mine and I don’t know how I ended up with it, but had HAD it so long i stopped mentally being aware of it, and several Cracked Magazines in a trash bag where they’d been at least ten years as I was always weird about throwing things away, but amidst trying to get the house sold last June I finally did, and I guess this tv series being made is revenge. I don’t know anything about it except for that picture, but I don’t really need to; I am 80% assured to hate any animated series whatever it is, this just happens to be a character that I recognize.

But it does go to show, if you stick to your craft, 30 years later a soulless corporation may commission an ugly computer mockery of it while desperate for new material not spun off from stuff they’ve had on the air almost as long or produced by sexual predators they finally had to fire after too many people found out they were covering up predation.

All this is not to say I hated the comic strips; I preferred the Nate book to the Marvin book, and it was my first experience with the expletive “dang!,”


which prepared me to encounter GRAYDANG in doom some time later, but I didn’t care enough to make an effort to track down more of Nate’s biggery. Meanwhile I eventually acquired each Calvin volume, though admittedly those were more common sights in book stores and finite in number.

I remember being really bothered by the way Lincoln Peirce drew the breast zone on Nate’s sister Ellen and apparently later other characters. I do not understand how this is preferable to not detailing a character’s chest at all.

However the bignate fandom wiki, which exists, features graphics which indicate this specific matter was toned down at some point. Peirce still draws mouths on the fronts of the heads regardless of what way they are facing.


the wiki also features up to the minute updates about which characters’ hair is pulled too close to their faces.

you are missing the bigger picture that Gina is a living cubist painting.


I additionally learned there was a big nate novel series by the same author that is REALLY banking on one remark from Jeff Kinney, whose “ugly comic strip about dork going to school excused by being ostensibly drawn by character in the comic” work actually came out a full 13 years after Lincoln Peirce’s and made heaps more money, and I wonder if Peirce knew the publisher was putting that line there. It is on all eight of the books,

and is also on reprint editions even less subtly. He definitely knew by then, I suppose.

Ah I said I hadn’t seen “big nate” since reading that book I had, but then I remembered I looked at its syndicate website at some point because I found and saved this extremely tacky strip from 2011.


I wonder how this works; how is a perpetual 12-year old commemorating the tenth anniversary of a national disaster that occurred when he was two years old? Or does this serve to acknowledge that he is in fact much older than that and simply not aging visually, like an elf?
Perhaps every moment of Nate’s life exists in its own separate timeline where he had been two years old ten years before, and in this one he has been surrounded by stories of heart-rending tragedy about nine-eleven and, unlike my cousin Delainey, about the same age, at the 9-eleven museum in New York City, or myself, mildly older than that on the actual nine-11, experiencing disillusionment and social terror at just existing every single day, totally over with being ordered to care about the one time people older than them experienced it, and got interviewed about it, and got validated in feeling that way, Nate REALLY relates to IX-XI. Alright that bully kid is STILL going to wreck that dopey pair of mounds, because the only thing bullies hate more than you standing there looking like that is you trying to get out of what’s coming to you. The only way to make bullies respect you is to beat them in a fight or make them laugh, and Nate, as the title character of a daily syndicated comic strip, is never going to substantially alter his behavior to get tougher or become funny so obviously those are both out. The only way that sand sculpture stays up is if bigger kid has mega right wing parents/guardianship that have hammered into him how SACRED 9-11 is, and new york’s FINEST, and the MEN AND WOMEN OVERSEAS, and PEARL HARBOR, and BOOTSTRAPS, in which case he is going to murder Nate and threaten Nate’s buddies into hiding the body for daring to invoke the divine power of 9-11. He will then call the newspapers, tell them he made the sand towers, get an award from the mayor and the city will make a bronze cast of it and display replicas at every intersection.


also: who the heck does this? places the end of their tongue out one side of their mouth to show how hard they are working. It is also in the title logo and apparently numerous other nate strips even without considering the logo. I sure don’t do that. I hate the feeling of tongues on my skin, whose-ever they may belong to. I would definitely have to scrape-wipe that part of my face afterward with tissue paper. I don’t think I have ever seen somebody outside of a comic strip or my mother’s description of a Norman Rockwell painting do that. And I don’t know what it’s called and searching for pictures based on the description is getting me way too many photographs of gross mouths so I cannot research this further. But my belief is that nobody really does this.
It is like talking while pointing one finger upward.



None of them are real people! I drew nemitz (orange annoying imp) doing it because nemitz does stupid things that are annoying, and even mit doesn’t engage in side-tonguing.


actually now that i think of it, the dork from goblins 3 looks sort of like nate (but not at all like calvin). they both have weird gravity-defying black spiked hair that looks more like grass and hold both feet in the exact same direction when facing to the side but only turn one of them and all the way around to face frontward, marking a considerable, charlie chaplin-esque posture change.


well THAT is the sort of thing i notice! too late to try and change it now.

some people notice other things.


this has no relevance but it is the specific inspiration for me referring to dopes as “decadent” on one or more occasions.



March 21, 2021
On an edition of WWE Raw, William Regal stated that WWE Diva Maria liked Rainbow Brite.

the end of the rainbow seems pretty overrated these days

this is less topical than it would have been had I been able to post on march 17, but Gold Bond fortunately does come in a topical variant. I don’t actually know what it does but nemitz probably doesn’t either and the dope absolutely doesn’t.

I acknowledge that this is rather similar to the stupid sketch I added on the previous entry.


initially mit was stepping on the pot with one foot but the pose was not functional. nemitz is not functional but mitz distribution of weight usually is. The bottle mit is holding in the final version is still out of scale with the ones in the pot because it seemed too stupid to bother correcting; plainly this scene does quite enough bothering on its own!



March 16, 2021
kimono cal, he’s your pal


The initial “idea” of this was to redraw legend of zelda sprites based on how i remembered interpreting them as a child looking at a blendy television screen, so they don’t all have a point, and then the idea itself got somewhat warped as I added more figures.

my elder brother used to refer to the lamnola as “the toilet flusher,” as in “here comes the usher, the ol’ toilet flusher,” and I didn’t really know what that meant but I thought it was funny and always remembered it. Years later I realized he probably meant “toilet brush,” and so I took the initiative of drawing it as one. He had also at one or more junctures declared that Rudolph the Six Gun Shooter had a very shiny gun, and that if I ever saw it, I would drop my pants and run, even though I would run far more effectively without the preceding action.

The “gel” blobs were my favorite monsters when I originally played the game and I made up a dumb song about them. I do remember the tune and it is not worth reproducing, but the words to it were
We fat men
we like you
we bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy
you kill us
we bounce on you
cuz we fat men we like you

but you keep that between us
I didn’t see any way to misinterpret the form for this but wanted to include one anyway!
I also remember playing the game one morning and was in level 3 quest 1, with the blobs, and my father saw this going on, attempted to sing the song, and I yelled at him for it because kids are jerks, and I also recall precisely how he got the tune wrong, and I today wonder how different it would have been had he been permitted to finish. We should have collaborated on an album about stupid nintendo monsters, and then he would at least deserve to get yelled at.

I don’t know why I didn’t think to include a “peahat” in this (or 2019’s very important hat video, especially considering i inadvertently put one hat scene in there twice) because as soon as I learned what it was called, I think from a television advertisement for the game, I always thought of peahats as actual sentient, wrathful hats, possibly with bladder issues, since I didn’t see it spelled out and couldn’t read and that makes as much sense as associating them with little green vegetable balls, and that is very much in the spirit of the drawings up there, even if more mentally than visually.


And alas now this has to happen instead.

the fbi should start its own peahat club and then arrest everybody who tries to join. yes nemitz would definitely attempt to join additional peahat clubs apart from mitz own. It now occurs to me that any hat nemitz wears while posing proudly instantly becomes stupid and incarceration-justifcation.



January 27, 2021
i lie awake, i toss and turn, i see your face, and it makes me burn


a creature known as nemitz preparing to do/possibly already doing something annoying. nothing new. There may be other components of this scene which are also not new since I drew it over somebody else’s character that I drew last year and felt inadequately appreciated for. That doesn’t mean I LIKE nemitz, but I am accustomed to the person responsible for nemitz not liking me, and I know at least that is one dislike that I deserve! I have many massive character flaws, for example, drawing flawed characters, foremost nemitz.

i have returned at last to working on the comic strip but had unfortunately left myself months ago with a complicated page to figure out, though at least it lacks nemitz. hopefully in the remainder of 2021 I will do more things that I only regret once!



January 13, 2021
it’s hard to answer your question of why we were naked


I scream you scream we all scream for nemitz’s immediate and unconditional termination
I can tell nemitz is VERY proud to have served that. Of COURSE nemitz owns a GOLD scoop. which is to say, nemitz STOLE a gold scoop. or stole a regular scoop and painted it gold. Or most likely stole a scoop and gold paint and annoyed somebody else into painting the scoop gold. What a thoroughly stupid and complex sequence of occurrences.

However, why would anybody go to a store where that thing is behind the counter, much less initiate a transaction? and then why would you stand there and watch while nemitz delivers this ludicrous order, and THEN have a problem? Those customers should be fired also.

I had “chris” under toppings section early on in production because the father of my niece is named Chris with the actual last name of Topping but it seemed improbable he would see this, and most of the people who will see it likely do not know who he is. Of course chris is still a strange thing to have on your dessert so please do not go and do that just because nemitz isn’t offering to do it for you. There are more stupid possibilities than nemitz can possibly get to, which is one of mits few redeemingish qualities.



December 15, 2020
you are trapped on ice. self-destructing…

something on thursday, is not christmas themed. It takes me so long to do anything, it is impossible for me to expect to have them done by specific dates, unless I simply do them months before they are relevant, and then I would have to wait to post them, and then I would suddenly feel very behind having spent that time on something I couldn’t use, and so I simply would not spend that time on that!
///////////////////////


no more googol maps for me! I finally got a real navigation system in this car. there is just something suspicious about it.

as it happens i was taking these things out of a storage unit, but why did the dumb dope have to be RIGHT there? it almost looks like I staged it that way, as if i noticed the painting was in my shot of the globe and then i turned it around so the dope would be there, which is ridiculous. And then later when i was unloading the car’s contents and returning from placing one set of things into the garage, there is THIS:


dope AND nemitz. i shouldn’t have to put up with that. why was I “storing” this anyplace but a dumpster? And why is it inside my house now?


free ‘sketch’ so to speak 2-76 in which the character of lyraderg refuses the services of a dope. how does this dumb clothes-wearing anthropomorph lizard manage to keep dopes away but I cannot? most of the free “sketches” have not had dopes or nemitzes in them, but the ones that do ironically tend to be better than the ones which do not. This being the case does not mean that i approve of dopes or nemitz. I believe they may have sabotaged the entire endeavor to make themselves seem less stupid overall, even though I simultaneously REFUTE that they are smart enough to do that. They wrecked everything by accident but while intending to have accidents. I am fortunate I got them out of the car when I did.



December 2, 2020
research reveals that they too were hitlers

I was attempting to prepare a popeye update but unfortunately this occurred.


free ‘sketch’ section 2, item 79, on this occasion for Nova4Cooper, moments before Sigm4 steals nemitz’ groceries for a good reason.

I have abstained from posting most of these here, but goodness gracious the nemitz in that picture, it should be illegal to smile that big.

And even though I said “groceries,” that was for the description I put on other websites. I know that is in fact a bag of pine cones. I am just too disgusted to say anything more about it. That weird robot was difficult to draw but at least it is doing a good deed. I know it is not stealing those pine cones because it WANTS pine cones, but it does recognize the importance of separating nemitz from pine cones.

i can’t stand it. you know if elpse went out and came back with a suck full of pumpkins it would never hear the end of the matter from nemitz. What a mitzocrite.

nemitz should be put on trial. or really, that is not necessary. i hereby proclaim this imp guilty of being nemitz. case closed.



May 2, 2020
Before the internet, there was very little indication that Scrappy wasn’t well liked.[12]


a quick test of the new tablet pressure sensitivity in ASEPRITE, a feature i had looked forward to for quite a while! i drew a nemitz first because anything i made after that could only be an improvement.
“quick” as in i probably meant to draw one frame in ten minutes that transformed into two hours
Unfortunately the way pressure sensitivity is implemented in the program is, so far, more of a detriment to me than help except on larger objects, like the tail here, so I have had it turned off for most of the process on what I did next! The way that works in clip studio I like much better. but if i ever get back to my so ill it transcends pandemic-fated doom-engine-based-construction i may be able to create animated sprite graphics faster for that; I draw them large and have them scaled down in the game so to minimize pixelation
aseprite is the same program I used to make [most of] the other pixel animations that would be found under the “animation” tab had I updated at all recently and not only haven’t I, the stuff that used to be on it no longer shows up because I linked to them from my deviantart account because they were already THERE and I could. That evidently is no longer the case. Ewps. I will hopefully tend to that before 2021.



April 13, 2020
i chew you like gum! i spit you out! you’re nothing but a fish! a smelt and not a trout!

oh fleeps I never made a website entry out of this


Obviously we are collecting boots today. I don’t see how you could have POSSIBLY messed that up. Hey, fool! We are not catching fish here. And yet you caught one. You couldn’t even catch cholera by ingesting the Vibrio cholerae bacterium, and still you caught a fish. Good job. “Good” as in “opposite of good.”
Atrocious. Typical nemitz move.

tennish years later


nemitz (orange imp) seems to be improving mitz skill at fishing. improved for nemitz, i mean. Presumably elpse (green imp) has something better to do. I hardly think there could be anything worse to do.

meanwhile I have I have not gotten much better at drawing!



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
Titash
pc72
Pickford
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

them`s fightin` woids: April 2, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
they somehow got on to my very oldest web pages so I can never truly forget about them. The...
April 2, 2021
Dhraiden sez:
I do not care for nor about this Nate fellow at all, but just wanted to say, kudos for including...
April 1, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
those books definitely have titles to the effect that the titles don’t matter at all, and...
April 1, 2021
Purplespace sez:
I have not heard of the eponymous Big Nate, but the book titles remind of the titles on Garfield...
March 29, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
I never saw it in a newspaper at all, I figured it was a southern or midwestern sort of thing,...
March 29, 2021
pindohodo sez:
“Big Nate is funny, big time” is both grammatically and factually wrong, big time! It...
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