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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
December 4, 2019
In the countryside I wander far and wide


An animated icon for nafradorf fumblewip.


I made this also some time ago. Presumably it sums itself up.

i thought animating like this would be easier than the other way, a thought which meant it wouldn’t be, but if I didn’t have optimism that a thought which has been wrong every time in the past would be right this time i would probably never try anything new!

Which I mean not to indicate that the thoughts I express at length are wrong; I think these thoughts are generally very right, but there may be no place for them that I have access to. Most people only care about thoughts that are expressed in venues where thoughts can only be expressed in stupid ways. Which makes me angrier, which makes the non-stupid thoughts more complicated and less feasible to complete, even though when they are completish they are guaranteed obscurity so it really isn’t necessary to increase the difficulty factor.


The drafts heap up. One of the drafts there is actually about animations i made or was expected to make for other people who lied and treated me horribly and it is my intention to not drift into that topic while discussing the one up there (a similar thing occurred when I posted the previous icon I made for nafradorf (also the rubber creep sent me ANOTHER message some time after I posted that and I am not afraid of him but he really is horrid). This one took just as long as the ones I am not talking about today but I don’t have ill feelings associated with it. I know this one is the end and I won’t have that specific problem again, because if somebody wants to try it I will see it coming! And then I won’t get tricked and I won’t have to never finish writing about it!



November 27, 2019
my body is aflame with a desire for revenge

an unremarkable sketchbook creature that nonetheless got coloured in, and yet still seems dissatisfied. Some people cannot be pleased!

also i was writing a website entry about a highway billboard that I saw and hated, and my hatred is bafflingly complicated these days so this is here instead of that.



November 15, 2019
chewy spree have a bad aftertaste


this is something that should make no sense to normal people, but I don’t know any of those anymore. if you have no idea what this is about I have deduced that you are better off continuing to not know than this website is with my attempt at explaining it present.

of course the picture is an exaggeration; only two people have actually become dead before they delivered on what I paid them for, and it probably seems callous to put their entire lives beneath some stupid garbage that I paid $30 or less for but it was funny before I thought about it at length and that was the only time anything about my relationships with those people was pleasant so I will take it.



October 24, 2019
Besides video games and music, Tallarico is an avid baseball and Spider-Man fan, and collects balsamic vinegar.[38][39]




I hated this event but I did enjoy seeing people having serious conversations while nemitz was hugging a toilet behind them, which is probably the only thing I liked about this event the past four years.

This event being the annual City Wide Open Studios “member show” at Artspace in new haven, a location within 20-30 minutes of moderate car driving from where I am usually. Being a member just means you paid $90. I point this out becomes occasionally somebody wants to congratulate my involvement but honestly truly all it requires is 90 dollars and being able to get there to sign some forms. A few hundred people have 18×18 inch items set up on grids where almost nothing stands out and then every person is crammed into the floor space so that no valid human interaction can occur. I primarily paid for access to the actual personal large scale art exhibition I will be setting up at another location, yet still forced myself to give this one more attention than it deserved, except for in 2017 when I just reused 2015’s painting, an act which nobody else seemed to notice or care about.

I speak about this so negatively, you may wonder why I am involved at all, and that is because the $90 also gets me a room for two days at the Alternative Space Weekend exhibition which is in a different place, along with a generous assortment of those few hundred others and so far I have found that worthwhile. The painting of course doesn’t get to go there since it is for the member show, which is in a different place, and it is a weird size, too small to impress or control detail the way I like to, so every year I think “next year I won’t bother” but 10 months later when I feel like less of a wreck I think “eh it wasn’t THAT bad, was it?” and do it again. Maybe by “publicly” stating that I won’t, I will prevent myself from doing so. Although knowing me, I already did that and merely forgot. Although if I knew me better, I would not forget things like that. I should spent more time getting to know me.


in 2015 i tried to impress with my painting skill.

in 2016 i tried to impress with a picture that I know people always liked the digital version of.

in 2018 i tried to make them laugh.

after failing to feel like I had been successful in the previous endeavors, this time I set out to annoy them,.

This is not finished to a degree that I like but considering that I did it between a friday the following monday night (the deadline) the time seemed relatively well spent; the fastest I had pushed one of these out and been done with it prior to then had been two weeks! If the crummy compressed gif works properly, it will be evident that nemitz (horrible red imp) was simple to paint, as I expected, but despite having the original quickly-done digital version as a guide I still misplaced the elements and had excess space on the right to fill, and made that harder than it needed to be!

Since almost all of my art is digital and NONE of it is optimized for a square… even though it used to be sometimes but I discovered none of the printing options I had access to favored squares, and likewise nobody sells hangable objects I could put a print into which would fill 18×18 inches well anyway, AND that I am useless at measuring, cutting, mounting and what-have-you, I have to seek out special 18×18 inch canvases and paint on them in my tiny little space which is not suited to painting. The nice acrylic paint I bought on past occasions which inexplicably is served in little toothpaste tubes almost all dried out.


However, the cheap 89 cent walmart paint rigid tubes i bought in 2008 for a terrible mural still worked just fine. What I found easily was lacking for a few colors, true red and something close to brown, primarily,

so I supplemented them with my 4.9-year old niece’s presumably equally cheap paint.

As noted, a few hundred people participate in the city wide open studios mess each year. Considering that I have to explain to each and every person I know each and every year that the painting I am working on is NOT for my actual art show I definitely wonder how other participants go about the matter. If not for the fact that it temporarily increases my scrap of legitimacy in the eyes of family members who do not consider digital art actual art (unless it is done on an apple brand i-pad by someone they know better) and by extension my scrap of self-worth, I really have no reason to bother! Also, the parking in New Haven is awful.
This time the dropoff deadline was 5-8 instead of 2-4 or whatever it was in the past. I figured after the designated “rush hour” of people leaving new haven, it would actually be easier to get into, but I did not consider that an even greater number of people from outside quite willingly go into it and take all the parking spaces within walking distance to this dump. I could probably handle even that but my inexperience parallell parking led a bystander that I initially considered helpful to offer to guide me through it. I forgot that helpful-seeming strangers are usually pushy nutworks who aren’t open to the idea that they aren’t helpful.
Go in backward instead of forward, yes, helpful. Wait for this car to pass before backing out every single time a car wants to pass: obvious and not helpful. calling me “dude” when you aren’t hulk hogan and “chief” in a manner apart from its historical function of acknowledging somebody of superior rank: not endearing. telling me “maybe you shouldn’t be driving that car then” when I am unable to keep up with his rapid “turn the wheel [this way]” commands because it got stuck for the first time ever because I guess it doesn’t like to be turned that much that often: I hate you. Reaching your hand through the window into my* car to point at [what I can’t remember or guess]: I’m leaving so I don’t start screaming at you. There was a less convenient street I could check for spaces which by that point seemed really convenient so i drove most of the way around the utterly 1-way block and went there instead.


The secret to driving well is to not be stupid or angry.



September 5, 2019
he is arrogant due to his unbelievable inheritance

In may I offered “100 free sketches” at the twittor website in a completely misguided and cynical attempt to expand my audience, not considering that I might end up with an audience full of expansion fetishists, or that I do my best work with no audience.
it “worked,” but only when I put in considerably more effort than i expected to, and of course only when drawing other people’s characters and noncepts. Not helping were folks who gave such information that there would be no potentially satisfactory way to draw what they wanted that could be at all simple, but only a few of them seemed so entitled that they were absolutely depending on me to do so, and so as usual the fault was mine for assuming it would be easy and doing it anyway, even though never once has something been easy when it seemed like it would be. To help disperse the blame, I inserted less reputable creatures into some of the images that I might complain about instead, and those will be appearing here.


free sketch #11, for https://twitter.com/lazy__lucy! a moth person whose eyes in fact always have heart shapes in them, even when not approaching a desirable destination.
I meant to draw a fork and knife both wearing little bowties beside the plate but thankfully did not do so. I believe I outlined their shapes and then didn’t notice I was drawing over them when adding the table cloth and then forgot they had been present. I also did not notice that the bowtie meep on this occasion lacks arms and perhaps both of these things are evidence of order in the universe.


free sketch #14, https://twitter.com/WhiteDahlia_ , time traveling assassin spy, tracks down the leader of a mysterious but most assuredly nefarious organization. I presume it is not actually missing an eye but since it has both eyes closed when it is feeling particularly proud of itself and it never isn’t, eyesight gradually becomes irrelevant.


free sketch #27 for https://twitter.com/IanKeith ! Phaeux helps nemitz have a good time on the swing set

free sketch #?, https://twitter.com/HeathenHeanow/ (who actually draws better than i do)’s character, also named heathen, bestows upon nemitz the order of the banana and birthday cake-flavored ice cream with sprinkles. nemitz reacts with mits usual ingratitudinal demeanor.


free sketch #28! https://twitter.com/TheAusSpideyGuy s character Leonardo knows that the best thing about having six arms is being able to pull rabbits out of three hats at once, although sometimes it is difficult to find three rabbits to participate in your routine on short notice.
pog was never meant to have anything in common with a rabbit visually and I never considered that there might be a resemblance until people started calling pog a “rabbit,” including the tip-soliciting lady who gives out animal shape balloons at a local restaurant who thought it really necessary to ask my 4.9-year old niece if she could find “the bunny,” referring to pog, on the sketchbook page I wasn’t finished with or actually exhibiting after mis-indentifying the actual rabbit i drew as a moose, though admittedly I had put a stupid helmet on it. Which happened last week even though this picture is from a month ago but it seemed relevant. Therefore pog seemed a natural reluctant choice for this role.

The person also thought my drawing of the sprite from secret of mana was a horse. Which is probably why I did so few ACTUAL sketches for this.


free sketch #36 https://twitter.com/DraygoDraygon ‘s character also named Draygo sees to it that nemitz gets squashed. nemitz feigns ignorance as to why this may have been necessary.

ree sketch #38: twitter.com/SpecstheFox and nemitz go sailing together. you might think it impressive that dumb old nemitz was able to rig the sail but nemitz probably bribed somebody else to do it in payments of stolen beans. (the captain hat is also stolen)


free “sketch” #45! https://twitter.com/CuntyMcPunty ‘s character Silver aids the cause of justice. rather than a specific content suggestion i was instructed to “go wild,” which in my case means “go stupid.” It might have been more appropriate for me to say: I don’t know you, you don’t even watch my page, and I don’t particularly want your name to appear on mine, and so I don’t see any reason to go anything on your behalf, but i did anyway because I am sick and I need help.


free sketch #¿ for https://www.deviantart.com/artificial-demon ! Acid Goblin hacks nemitz’s computer.

That is of course only the monitor but nemitz is ignorant and probably thinks that part is the computer.
nemitz should not even HAVE a computer. mit probably just looks up pictures of beans on pinterest.


aksi: here is the actual original sketch that I used to advertise what I was doing. I think only three that I delivered were actually of this level of quality. I figured I could chank out ten of these a day, forgetting that nemitz in a basic moron pose is really easy to draw and that I hold myself to a much higher standard when drawing things that I want other people acknowledge the existence of. Nemitz deserved to be promptly forgotten once mit is crushed by that tree.

and a “raffle” is when somebody demands that you share their post and watch their page for a chance that you MIGHT get something for free. I think it is despicable. And so not only did I commit myself to much more work, I necessarily capped the free advertising I could get from it on account of my committing to granting something to every participant but only a set number of them. Does that all make sense? It shouldn’t! Also the nature of this sort of thing meant that most of the people who did participate were sickos who just like the idea of getting stuff, not much caring what it is or who it is from. And I could tell because when I checked their pages to make sure they had retwutted my post before making a request of me there were often already 6 fresh raffle retweets above mine. And of course a few of them didn’t do it at all.
Or they will have extremely niche, stupid tastes that I can’t even talk about with explaining and making myself seem insane just for having been directly in contact with, and only share the offer with other people who are even deeper in the same dumb niche, and then blambi, I have to draw a whole bunch of 8 limbed inflatable monstrosities being force-fed after being flattened by steam rollers. You know, stuff normal people like.
By this point I have finished about 56 of them, which is roughly half because I kept letting people sign up after I closed the thing. Even though decent people would probably honor my set total and not ask to be let in after I had closed it. I wouldn’t let nemitz get away with that! Or I would certainly sternly and directly rebuke nemitz instead of talking indirect trash about mit on another website. It wouldn’t be professional to talk to fictional characters on my website in an insincere manner.



May 15, 2019
don’t say no to drugs, say no thank you

three more unrelated idiots that happened to have been sketched near each other.
I should look into putting up a picture with something happening in it one of these days!

Or at least deviate into a less-rigid setup than this one if I feel a need to keep crinkling out dumb illustrations to prove that i continue existing. And then make sure i don’t bland out the subtle distinctive elements of the original cheap sketch in my haste to not spend hours and hours on something that I know does not matter. And if I do that anyway, try to avoid looking back at the sketch and becoming aware of that after already smearing the “finished” one in front of all the same people multiple times across the different websites.

I trusted in a formula that usually results in passable mediocrity, like the Famous Studios Popeye cartoons, but every once in a while even a stable formula fails, and with nothing else behind it there is going to be something totally unredeemable, like when Popeye came home from World War 2 and the writers/management decided he should stop hitting people all the time and be more like Donald Duck and be a stooge to a cute animal or his dipfip nephews instead of an invincible meathead who won’t compromise even when it means leveling an entire town, even though his popularity stems directly from his ability to appear noble while being a destructive stubborn clod.


I won’t even talk about the terrible, totally official popeye cartoons made in 2018, because I am going to bed. The simple fact is that Popeye cartoons have been lame for most of their existence so freaking out over extensions of that trend will solve nothing. I think fictional characters should become public domain property after 70 years regardless of what boneheads swap the rights around. I think I said that ages ago in a post that I never finished because my brain is soup. They belong in their own time periods. Take them out too far and they become something else that might as well be called something else, exclusively benefiting and appealing to horrid people.
I do not want to appeal to horrid people. Not for free, anyway! Rushing for free is as beneficial as rushing for spinach.



April 21, 2019
Was it fun going up and down in the fort made of bones? Or was it scary? I wouldn’t know, because I’m only a cactus in a pot.


a commission drawing for nafradorf fumblewip featuring Vibert, a skeleton creature with many mysterious powers, such as being able to function without muscles or a circulatory system or other such things.

Usually I do not post drawings that I took money for because they often come out poorly and without something personal in them that I can laugh at to distract from the poorliness, but the last thing I put up here was worse and I evidently am adequately self conscious about that to try and dilute that by putting something in front of it but not removing it entirely. Additionally, one of my internal mental processes always insists it constitutes defamation toward whoever gave me money to have disclosed that they did so.



April 19, 2019
Honestly I fail to see what the fascination is running round hitting monsters all the time but my own son is quite taken by that.


Brienne of Norfair

i had meant to draw Brienne (from some book or tv show or something) with Samus (from some computer doohickey the kids like) years ago, but this came out instead, and more effectively distracts from my deficits drawing non-creature people.

i imagined the blood should be yellow but it doesn’t look like blood when i do that. and crocomire of course is not defeated like that, but it does insist on being attacked in the mouth.

I wrote an in-depth report explaining numerous reasons why this pictures was not functional and why I should have expected that to be the case. Exhibiting the report would likewise not be functional! None of it is anything new.
The lesson to be learned from all this is that there is no lesson because anything good that happens is a fluke occurrence. The only LOGICAL course of action is ignore all precedent and hope for magic, which I did and will likely continue to do. OR accept that I will never get anywhere and not try anything, which is not a viable option until I get on to some serious medication that makes me not care. For now, caring is inevitable.

Eh I posted it as a comment on the entry. It is not funny or trying to be, just sad and analytical.
A few hours later I removed that comment, but then I put it back. I am embarrassed merely that it exists, not due to any specific thing I said in it.



April 11, 2019
A confusing jamboree of piercing noise, routine roller-skating, misogyny and Orwellian special effects, ”Starlight Express” is the perfect gift for the kid who has everything except parents.


page 3-36 of this whose front page i have replaced with the page list because that is the only one I link to anyway.
as if this whole section of the “story,” were not detoury enough, I felt an overpowering urge to insert yet another detour to tie up an element i introduced ages ago without a plan for it that i probably could have resolved a few pages ago in a more natural fashion but did not think of until now. Or rather i had some resolution in mind but it would have been yet less natural than this. But to wait yet longer would be worse.

i think my dropped/shoddily resolved plot point track record is still better than Twin Peaks season 3 and it only took me half as long to make this.

As often occurs, this does not feel at all finished to me. I worry that the overall product has lost much of what little semblance of being coherent it ever had. But I do not know how to fix it without gutting the satiation of my own obsessive compulsion that it provides. All the people who look straight at it and ignore it except to remark on how “cute” nemitz is while openly endorsing really, really dumb stuff can be wrong but not likely 100%.

When I put the second comic book together, a big heap of the time involved stretching out an area that was much too condensed. That seems to only be possible when I already have all the scenes drawn, which is ridiculous because it is much easier to move things when they are only vague sketches. Things that make sense do not make sense to me.



April 3, 2019
Matthew has a crush on Kimberly from school and it is partly due to this that Chester persuades him to dress like a girl and play for the team under the name Martha.


apparently I have much more to say about this than I can manage at the moment so I will instead say as little as possible and hopefully prompt myself to finish later.
if necessary you can watch a few seconds of that for your own independent research.



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them`s fightin` woids: November 29, 2019
Charmlatan sez:
But is it pog’s desire or the creatures? I fear the day of pog’s reckoning, you...
November 27, 2019
Charmlatan sez:
Certainly amps me up for some beets. Me thinks I may dine on the second beet of the year.
November 20, 2019
Frimpinheap sez:
The dope really ought to offer some indication that it is being whacked properly! I...
November 20, 2019
Frimpinheap sez:
I fear that much of my life experience confirms that!
November 20, 2019
Dhraiden sez:
Proper dope whacking takes good form and years of dedicated practice
November 20, 2019
Dhraiden sez:
The takeaway clearly is that it’s easier to annoy than impress or entertain
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