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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
May 2, 2020
Before the internet, there was very little indication that Scrappy wasn’t well liked.[12]


a quick test of the new tablet pressure sensitivity in ASEPRITE, a feature i had looked forward to for quite a while! i drew a nemitz first because anything i made after that could only be an improvement.
“quick” as in i probably meant to draw one frame in ten minutes that transformed into two hours
Unfortunately the way pressure sensitivity is implemented in the program is, so far, more of a detriment to me than help except on larger objects, like the tail here, so I have had it turned off for most of the process on what I did next! The way that works in clip studio I like much better. but if i ever get back to my so ill it transcends pandemic-fated doom-engine-based-construction i may be able to create animated sprite graphics faster for that; I draw them large and have them scaled down in the game so to minimize pixelation
aseprite is the same program I used to make [most of] the other pixel animations that would be found under the “animation” tab had I updated at all recently and not only haven’t I, the stuff that used to be on it no longer shows up because I linked to them from my deviantart account because they were already THERE and I could. That evidently is no longer the case. Ewps. I will hopefully tend to that before 2021.



April 25, 2020
Elfaria: A Fantastic Theater


page 48 of the bimshwellian comicoid.

the gnomes are regrettable but elpse was pretty regrettable for a long time and now I find it very amusing. The colors on this page at least are nice. i think they are nice!
i worried that the “kaiser monarchs,” the motorcycle gang-like assemblage the gnomes belong to was among my least inspired groups of characters, and maybe i was right because i just learned [thursday] that the ill-fated pixar film onward also features a “pixie biker gang” similar in appearance and presumably to some degree in behavior to the gnome collective. I look forward to people talking to me like I ripped that off in a few years.

ehhh my approach is still probably awkward and contrarian enough to not retroactively be construed as a rip-off of that by people who need to see everything i make in terms of recent media they consumed. Due to various factors including a worldwide pandemic that you may have heard about coinciding with its theatrical release, “onward” may also be one of the least-seen pixar films so i have even less to worry about. Even though the more people think i am inspired by recent media the more they accept what I do so perhaps I should encourage them to think that but I don’t like being liked like that!


my gnomes are more awkward than onward but at least I like them. I don’t like these at all.
According to this blurry picture and I didn’t want to go searching for more, “pixie dusters” is their name. Whereas i thought a gang name that directly alluded to my characters being gnomes was too on-the-comically oversized nose. However they like butterflies and “monarch” is a powerful-sounding type of butterfly, and then kaiser because i thought kaiser helmets were really funny for a bunch of years, hence the name.

I got to thinking about onward because i inadvertently read that pixar had paid whoever owns dungeons and dragons now to use a Beholder in the movie in some capacity, which made it necessary for me to skim its synopsis to be certain it wasn’t just doubling down on the wreck it ralph formula, but I think instead it is just quadrupling down on the pixar formula, which is essentially the same thing but the characters have smaller eyes and ugly little footless stump legs and prefer annoying existing songs to ones that they sing themselves. Prior to then i had seen pictures of the main characters and thought they looked sort of like greegorp and lactorp, the pointy-ears imbeciles from my beet cartoons but had no reason to presume the behaviors were similar.

LATER ON in the one other picture I saw, it became apparent to me that one of the characters is holding a drink bottle many times larger than itself, which would indicate the creatures are rodent-sized, which would make them QUITE different from my gnome gang. I would question why something that could fly would need a motorcycle or how at that size it would get one. you can’t just say “oh magic” to explain that because nothing else about it is magicy. I would accept and grant credibility to the gang if they mugged Runaway Ralph and Stewart Little during the film because disney can buy and use just about any character they want in any way they want but that would still only get vehicles for two of them.



April 21, 2020
Though Tintin’s staged as a reporter for Brussels, he has had several other jobs such as a spaceman and a mountaineer.


an attempt to convert some creatures of that sketchbook page into a remotely coherent composition. It did not work! But I felt artistically fulfilled for a few hours.

the website that links to is evidently not being used to its greatest potential by me but it seems to function in the capacity of displaying my only just slightly edited for the purpose of clarity scanned sketch book pages without me feeling self-conscious about the minimal level of value they seem to be perceived as having, which I have been unable to accomplish on other trendo sites.

the green thing did not initially make any statement about its appearance nor even wear glasses but I could tell it thought it looked like spike lee. Initially the words just floated beside the creature as if it was dialog but I do not think that is aesthetically functional in this sort of image, but fortunately it seemed plausible that this creature would have a sign made with this pronouncement written on it that the creature would pose in this presence of.


In the upper left is an incredibly corny looking, tiny dopey teapot that was a recurring element in the painting classes I had when pursuing a largely superfluous bachelor degree. I could tell the teapot was profoundly proud of itself and that it thought it was the honorable Horace T. Teapot. it probably also has a sign announcing that just out of the frame. It might as well be wearing a bowtie. You could probably make ONE cup of tea in that dumb teapot. I have NO idea what it is so proud of. I thought for certain I had explained all this years ago but apparently I did not which is why the world is in such a dire situation.


this about sums it up



April 13, 2020
i chew you like gum! i spit you out! you’re nothing but a fish! a smelt and not a trout!

oh fleeps I never made a website entry out of this


Obviously we are collecting boots today. I don’t see how you could have POSSIBLY messed that up. Hey, fool! We are not catching fish here. And yet you caught one. You couldn’t even catch cholera by ingesting the Vibrio cholerae bacterium, and still you caught a fish. Good job. “Good” as in “opposite of good.”
Atrocious. Typical nemitz move.

tennish years later


nemitz (orange imp) seems to be improving mitz skill at fishing. improved for nemitz, i mean. Presumably elpse (green imp) has something better to do. I hardly think there could be anything worse to do.

meanwhile I have I have not gotten much better at drawing!



April 6, 2020
The American bus, the American car is a bus and a car for all Americans,


page 3-47 of the bimshwellian comic strip. a huge hard to draw waste of space but possibly the last page that will take place in this parking lot! Now instead of a difficult to draw background I have an impossible to draw object that is simultaneously foreground AND background.



April 1, 2020
I highly suggest wearing a filter mask; to protect the nose against satanists using demon transmission and physically veil shifting stagnant air into the room from hell, giving the perception of being able to “send people” “smells.”


I fear this mask business may be getting a bit out of hand


the original “plan” for this included additional mask-types but at that stage it looked to me more like a bad local mural or the cover to an issue of Cracked magazine than something that was supposed to be taken less-than-seriously. i laughed while making it but sometimes that is an instinct-like reaction to things that i am really worried about not being funny, like some previous images related to halloween, bad geico advertisements (all of them are bad) and my experience at the louvre museum.
The worst thing about the version I decided on is that after I added the dope on the shelf on the left I didn’t want to crop it out even though the composition works much better with that mostly empty space removed and EVERY composition works much better with dopes removed. Theoretically the older version is superior on account of lacking dopes, apart from the cart advertisement seeking to raise awareness of them, but ultimately it is ugly and trying too hard. The final version tries a more appropriate amount.



March 24, 2020
Production was halted at the end of the first semester after the producers felt that existing footage was not dramatic enough, and after Danza refused to allow the producers to try to generate drama among his students.


treco de gallo conducts an independent inquiry into the authenticity of claims made in mortimewde stapleton meepmire’s latest product endorsement



March 17, 2020
He’s out to clean up a city that likes being dirty. He can’t do it alone



They all thought I was mad for believing this would one day be the most valuable item in my house



March 13, 2020
Food shortages in Europe following World War I caused great hardships, including cases of mangel-wurzel disease, as relief workers called it. It was a consequence of eating only beets.[5]

3-15-2020 grupdate: I heard from General Thorax that paper towels are back in stock but latrine parchment isn’t or has already been bought up again, and chicken is also now a commodity item! oh oh oh those glory days of last tuesday are long gone. And dish soap down to the last bottle as well, even though one bottle of that lasts what, a month or so? How much of this are people really expecting to use?
/////////////////
there is probably a pretty good chance of me getting the covid19 disease but I still think I am more likely to die in a car, turning left at a 4-way intersection or trying to merge onto a highway and I do those things all the time without any more toilet paper than I usually have

hold on what is this? i am receiving an urgent transmission on the emergency line



as soon as I received the master’s request i headed out seven hours later. In between those two points an empty cardboard box jumped off the shelf behind my bed and bopped me on the head. i presume it was planning that anyway. in the tiny united state of connecticut where as of the day after I posted this there have only been twelve confirmed cases, none of them in towns near here, I figured the matter was not urgent.


guilford walmart

guilford big-y-world-class-market(s)

madison stop & shop/keep going and don’t shop


people love to be prepared, except not really because I saw one person apiece at stopshop and big-y wearing gloves and nobody wearing gloves, including the staff, at walmart. note also: walmart sells darm cheap but effective gloves.

for example, the right glove here is from walmart. it does not match the left glove. i have a startling array of left-hand gloves but only a few for the right, all actually ambidextrous gloves, because legitimate right gloves like to blow away in the wind when I remove them to blow my nose. also this picture isn’t a trick, both hands are in front of me and i took a screenshot with my voice-activated forehead camera. the command is “help there is a camera embedded in my forehead it hurts”

nobody wears gloves but walmart does however have this thing that encourages customers to REMOVE their shoes and stand in the same spot. i haven’t heard of diseases being transmitted via feet but i haven’t heard of diseases not being transmitted because you bought a truck load of bog roll either.

also i have spent four weeks in england my entire life and have no right to use the terminology “bog roll” but I am at a loss for functional synonyms.


This was at Wal-Mart. Not quite a glove but I appreciate that you are trying, though the experience seems to be traumatic for most of the figures involved.


the toilet paper problem is so bad this pez candy has no choice but to be covered in feces and we are helpless to do anything about it. seriously why can’t we stop putting this horrid imagery on to things?


this car boldly shows its support of the world health organization. however i would prefer you keep those jars to yourself

I don’t mind the stores being crowded like this necessarily, there is an exciting atmosphere. It is like Christmas except people only want practical things for gifts, a concept I can endorse


additionally, i got a free fountain soda with my 12-inch sandwich at big-y. yes i took coke, mid-day; i wasn’t going to take their awful megaprocessed minute maid lemonade. i have to think about my health.
In fact I was not initially intended to drive across town from the walmart big y plaza to get to stop & shop but i felt so invigorated by recieving a free drink that I found the strength to grasp a wheel and press a large button with a foot for a few additional minutes.

no precaution is too extreme for this leprechaun, who appears to be wearing a diaper over his trousers, assuming he is wearing trousers

meanwhile this leprechaun has taken to hoarding gold.
am i supposed to be impressed by that offer? $50 is rather a small amount of gold. i think it is a ruse so he can break into our homes and steal our precious toilet paper while we go to collect his gold that we won’t actually be able to buy any with.

after stop and shop i noticed the automobile had nearly expended its gasoline, and i had 200 fuel reward points from stop and shop purchasers, which I could redeem for 20 cents off per gallon of petroleum at participating retailers. i considered that fuel prices might be dropping world-wide and that i might save more than that if i just waited a week but if we can run out of toilet paper in three days without needing it we can run out of gasoline in a week actually using it


i can never remember which way to turn this thing, though. hm ah hatten how does it go: righty-tighty, lefty loosey, loosey goosey,


henny penny!

i was not wearing gloves at this time because i had been eating my sandwich, have difficulty handling my money items with gloves on and also i feel safer from disease in a gritty rainy gas station parking lot than inside a walmart


Stop & Shop’s Pal™, Marty the amazing aisle-blocking dead-staring robot, seems to be sitting this one out. I think all the panicking is giving it anxiety.

or perhaps the staff are concerned about saving shoppers anxiety.


i ran out of bags on this occasion since I felt i needed to buy something to justify being in each store. This large package of paper towels is, in truth, from a month ago because i had to buy three of them to get the full discount and we are still on the second package in my house (the seltzer is drunken by other people than me. they almost never finish the cans and i frequently have to dump the things out before tossing them into the recycle bin but this is immensely preferable to and less expensive than when the same people drank diet caffeine-free pepsi in the same manner. the tables have been in there since my art show in november).


likewise, this cabinet full of soup was happening anyway. once a year they sell the progresso soup for 50% off for a week so i bought a bunch. the last time it happened i didn’t buy enough and had to buy FULL PRICE SOUP at one point. so this time i bought more than the previous time, and then the sale happened again the next month and so i bought more.
I don’t think there is anything WRONG with hoarding this sort of thing, but it is better to do gradually over time when rates suit it. the 14 piece chicken 7 biscuits and 2 large sides mobile coupon that i have been using at popeyes the past year however i have recognized as an objectively bad idea because i need to eat it all within about three days.

there only appear to be seven paper towel rolls because i tore one of them open during my previous shopping trip on tuesday when, first of all, there was PLENTY of toilet paper in stock and I had seen no urgency to the purchase of it, and i partook of stop & shop’s store made fried chicken, which is surprisingly good (and cheap) provided you buy it in late afternoon when they apparently make it. Unable to restrain myself I was eating it while returning, driving the car, on the street nearest my home, when I saw a woman jogging the same direction, who stopped to fiddle with a mobile device. as the car passed I was holding the biggest piece of chicken and there was probably evidence roundabout my mouth area. The jogger looked straight at me with a look that I was not sure was confusion, worry, or possibly disgust. I didn’t get chicken today because i already bought the sandwich and if i had not bought the sandwich i would not have bothered to go all the way to stop and shop which is in the opposite direction that Big-Y is from my home. Everything clear? I hope so because there is nothing left to wipe it with.

The disparity between Tuesday and today is striking; it means somebody actually had to buy


this strangely designed product that simulates the presumably cathartic experience of ripping up a lumberjack’s flannel shirt. I hope he has a patchwork shirt like the Poky Little Puppy’s blanket after the next re-stocking.

this really is not up for debate

I am going home



March 8, 2020
a dragon’s sole purpose… is to destroy mermaids



regrettably i have not been able to give this the attention it needs — i don’t like those static poses during the zoom in– because i want to conclude the terrible “free sketches-turned-needlessly-elaborate-digital-paintings I have been doing through twitter and shouldn’t need more than another two weeks for that, but this at least expresses the general idea of what this “scene” is. i will have to add more clutter and possibly draw it from different angles. i probably spend more time drawing backgrounds than animating at this point.

the recording is not good but circumstances are not always convenient for messing with noises! It at least is adequate for matching visuals to it since I presume (which usually means i am wrong) that re-recordings will have sufficiently similar pacing that the mouths won’t match any worse than they presently do.

Now that i see how pathetic that imp looks getting slapped around i want to give it a higher pitched voice. yesterday i inadvertently found a late 2016 digital interpretation i made of its vague paper sketches that i presumed existed but was not able to locate when I finally, actually got around to starting this in 2019, whose design differs from this one, so I ought to sort of which is the real one before going further. but will I? if it is a good idea, probably not.



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
Titash
pc72
Pickford
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

them`s fightin` woids: July 5, 2020
Charmlatan sez:
Don’t worry about having cake, because unfortunately I had enough for both of us. Oh dear. Oh...
July 4, 2020
Frimpinheap sez:
once i gave the blue dope a specific reason to have an umbrella, I could no longer casually...
July 4, 2020
Charmlatan sez:
Ah, interesting. Perhaps the umbrella can come back as a secret weapon. Hope there’s more...
July 4, 2020
Frimpinheap sez:
one dope is much like another but that is correct. It carries an umbrella in the cartoonish...
July 4, 2020
Charmlatan sez:
So that unfinished cartoon was actually the introduction cutscene for your doom game?...
June 25, 2020
Charmlatan sez:
I’ve been passenger to many drivers that ‘take a minute’ for some errand. It...
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