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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
June 10, 2021
Snakes are actually more scared of humans than we are of them, experts explain


this month is, as an increasing number of businesses want to tell me, a “pride month.” Specifically with regard to whom you do or do not want to have sexual relations. But I do not know how to be proud of something that I did not have a choice about or work to achieve, particularly when the things I DID work to achieve I am also often not proud of! Even if I could manage it, experience has shown that no established group represents any of my own interests, especially as more and more of the symbols are co-opted by global corporations that are larger than many national governments. I am destined to be confused and alone! Is it possible I am proud of THAT? I hope not. But I am confused and consequently uncertain.


Contrary to what deviantart and world-class comedian Fortune Feimster suggest, my true self’s pride is not what it creates with, but what with which it distances itself from other people.
i do appreciate that the person i never heard of being shoved at me today by a corporate entity is not a fraction of my age and famous for smirking on youtube or singing shoddy songs, but I still find no fun or camaraderie in marketer-approved activities.

I used the pathetic snake in the illustration because it has and is problems closest to coinciding with my own, despite being subtly different in appearance from my self.
my “regular” characters are extremely proud of themselves but none of them know what “sex” is as far as I am aware. YOU may, naturally, be proud of whatever you want! this here is only about me. and it.

for other websites I named this piece “pride and precipice” because oh how droll it rhymes with the title of a book I never read. But I also realized that


years ago naming this painting “unimprecipe” must have made no sense. i confused “precipice,” a word for the edge of a cliff (specifically a vertical edge rather than the cartoonish, ready-to-crumble overhangs I prefer to draw but nobody knows that) with the evidently non-existent “precipe.” This is otherwise irrelevant to the present subject matter.

a few weeks earlier my mother had sent me a link to “asexuality, the ascent of the invisible sexual orientation” but which seemed to especially focus on “asexual” folk wanting to see more asexual folk on television, and I was not sure how to respond to the link-sender about it, and never did. I am not asking you to read that! I am merely issuing proof that it exists.

I appreciate my mother’s consideration, as twenty three years ago when I first knew I didn’t want to be called he him his, there was absolutely no way to bring up this topic and not encounter misery or mockery. I remember the first time I did I was asked by this person “do you want to be like TOBY?” a ridiculous ‘neuter’ person who had appeared on the Sally Jesse Raphael show, clips of which were subsequently shown and laughed at on the E channel’s Talk Soup program, which we both watched. I did not want to be like Toby. I still do not want to be like Toby.



it’s about 40 minutes, this link is just to prove it exists, I am not asking you to watch it!
Toby is boring and has a boring name, even though Toby’s stated approach to sexual matters and method of responding to people who are far too curious about it is similar to mine. Asexual is not the same as agender but they occupy the same “nobody is selling what I am buying” part of their respective spectrums. AND I don’t want anyone to sell it!

However I am not at all concerned about the more recent self-labeling asexuals’ “representation.” Any group with photogenic representatives will eventually get represented in photography, and they are certainly prettier than Toby. They will get what they want. I do not seek representation, as I do not trust anyone else to achieve it. What I want is to be believed and accepted when I describe my own condition, not have to check a box and not have to choose a flag. Maybe news of self-described asexuals would reach more neuro-normal fans of awful media, and after long enough eventually be believed by them, and make it easier to describe my own problem to them, but that would be a side-effect.


Admittedly I have in the past appreciated fictional characters that are never shown to have outwardly sexual identities, like Samus, Tintin, even dumb old Rygar. I don’t need an official seal of “by the way they’re ASEXUAL!” to appreciate that they do something important without romance screwing things up. And I would continue to prefer them if labeled asexuals started appearing in crummy tv shows, having that be their core defining trait and being exactly like every other annoying complacent smirking jeans-wearing forklogan I don’t like otherwise.
And I do like Olive Oyl, Dynamite Headdy and certain Batmans, who sometimes have their decision-making skills impaired by the appearance of romance potential, because they are able to remain interesting. Sailor Moon is perfectly capable of both fighting evil by moonlight and winning love by daylight. What I don’t like are gross, boring “sex scenes” and contrived pairings, like when a woman and man fight each other a lot and then out of nowhere start kissing, I can’t stand it.

it is the “love” as a completely embarrassing and forced plot device that I cannot tolerate. I may also experience difficulty tolerating the people who tolerate them! Even if asexuals never do this I have every confidence that terrible writers will think of other disconcertingly moronic things for them to do instead.


I can imagine the gay porn test being a quad-annual requirement for renewing your asexual license.

I don’t even like the WORD “sex” and I think “ace” sounds stupid but that isn’t necessarily the fault of anyone I am griping about today.


apparently there are rings you can buy or forge to grant yourself the magical power to not want to do sex. I should be grateful to not need one, perhaps. I suppose the idea is to identify yourself so you can be found and find others with a similar condition without having to be very ostentatious and PROUD. A little black ring is more discreet than a big dumb flag. I don’t like having constricting trinkets stuck to my skin, though. I have never even been able to wear a watch, back when people wore watches. A ring is worse since it will either be too tight or inclined to fall off and get lost, and I would want to constantly fiddle with and adjust it before then.


and now I need a flag to let everyone know I am a fiddler!



June 2, 2021
the mork and mindy and laverne and shirley and the fonz hour

very busy tuesday and wednesday. thursday should have a proper update with hopefully most of the text I fussed over on wednesday and tuesday when I was busy and boring not included.


comic page 53 of part 3 of this

as has frequently occurred, I came into conflict between wanting to be accurate with what i already showed years ago that i drew on a whim and what purpose I actually require the already established form to serve. one of the events that occurs at this location requires a hallway, which I wrote without considering I had already drawn a narrow tower. But I suppose it can work in a tower.

and even now i am not certain what sort of business goes on in this place. is it administrative offices? a shopping mall? a hotel? maybe it will never be important and I can avoid being clear. maybe these smiling morons are so dumb that they have businesses that don’t make any sense and I should not attempt to understand or explain.



May 11, 2021
I bid thee welcome to Wellgarth town. I shall sing for thee.

I personally liked it better in a square layout but then i had too much extra space to fill, and social media websites are lamentably kinder to vertically elongated images. i initially planned it with two additional frames that i realized were irrelevant, and then thought of a new one to add in, but that still messed with the negative space. in fact i could probably still eliminate three more to aid in clarity for anyone, probably most people, who have not had this particular problem.

I found that when i tried to invent a car suitable to the creature’s proportions i lacked the skill to make individual parts of the control mechanisms apparent as what they were intended to represent, and so used direct photograph references. the more realistic car may produce an amusing contrast relative to the blatantly fake driver, anyhow.



April 11, 2021
Bad news, in the last few hours the famous criminal SCRUBBY scaped.


comic strip part 3 page 52 of that
nope nope nope I am not getting any faster, even with blatant background recycling, but this page had an unusually high amount of points for me to needlessly make the process harder with. in fact I didn’t get to all of them yet but everything RELEVANT is in there, I believe, for now.



March 7, 2021
Though Muzak Holdings was for many years the best known supplier of background music, and is commonly associated with elevator music, the company did not itself supply music to elevators.[5]


You will possibly need to click at this in order to be able to read the words in the event you are interested in doing that.

I have told of the encounter that inspired this a few times before I went and made it. One person claimed to know what a fort night dance was but was unable to explain it, and I was uninterested in personally investigating.
The intent of this comic strip was to express frustration in relating to other people, not that I just don’t know what sort of music I like or how to find it; I have been hoarding it for decades now! Rather I think people who rely on youtube, spotify or ueck record stores to provide music for them suffer more than I do in this respect. I can hear what I want when I wish to and need not worry that I will abruptly lose access to it if stuff gets deleted, my connection goes or what have you.
obviously if I still have to type out an explanation then the comic strip has failed in some way but it still provides a foundation for an explanation that people will attempt to grasp, whereas when it is ALL text it is more likely to be completely ignored, or perhaps worse, skimmed.

I seem to have multiple versions of this image sequence; one says “energetic” and another says “Japanese” and I no longer remember which was an edit to try and be more clear. “Video game music” on its own means essentially nothing at this point, as you can put sappy acoustic guitar drear or imbeciles yelling over static into a video game and legally it qualifies as “game music” and somebody will mentally contrive a way to think I am referring to that if I say I like video game music, as if I am that arbitrary and simple. Because, in fact, I often am; there are foods that I know contain certain ingredients that I don’t want to think about, but I can eat those foods so long as the ingredients are not brought to my attention within close chronological proximity of my eating the food. And I just spent over an hour removing tags from “new” bedding material (it formerly belonged to someone else), including the inside of pillow cases where they were never at risk of coming in contact with my skin, because otherwise I will have dreams about the tags somehow getting me if I succeed in sleeping no matter how far away and rolled up into the . But about music my arbitrariness only extends to not wanting to hear anything from someone that I feel personally secretly in competition with, but nobody knows that. Nobody can guess the stupid rules that control me! I should* make a comic strip about that!
*n’t

Yes I think “Japanese” was the earlier version, because I didn’t want someone saying something like “BUT WHAT ABOUT ROB HUBBARD?” But for every Rob Hubbard that made the best use of their technology and did interesting things with it there are seven Kingsley Thurbers who banged random notes on a keyboard, painted bad electric guitar sounds and default spc kit trumpets over them and did the base minimum a job required. Apart from that early western developed video games rarely had more than a few tracks, if they had more than one, while Konami, Namco, ah ahh ahhhh-Arsys, whoever, were diapercharging games with heaps of music as soon as the technology permitted, and sometimes they even credited the people who made the music!
Anyway even having just the one word in there breaks the flow and I should prioritize entertainment attempt value over information since as noted I inevitably end up explaining everything anyway. weh



February 28, 2021
He had been briefly censored the previous month for the use of the word “diaper.”


page 3-51 of that
Trying to draw every single object from the bag held this up somewhat, in part because I was not sure what all of them were. it seems like every page has several elements that make it unusually difficult to draw, which means that it is not unusual at all and i am just really terrible at dealing with a wide range of subject matters!



February 8, 2021
locksnake should keep inquisitive hands to themselves


with the amount of words in there it had better be self explanatory. however you may need to click at it to be shown a more legible version.
The main point this sets out to prove is to myself; often complaining about things with words is less effective than using pictures of words, but and so I needed to try it like this to finally shut myself up about it! Although having said that it is generally unwise to believe anything that a snake tells you or tells me.
I suspect it may have especially missed the mark because the first, so far the only “like” this has in its favor (for I am yet paranoid enough to check) within the facebook is from one of the specific people whose confounding behavior inspired it.



February 2, 2021
The transcription factor “forkhead box O” (FoxO) has been identified as a critical driver of the continuous self-renewal of Hydra.[17]

page 50 of part 3 of this


initially I drew a vague gift basket but then I looked back and realized the basket was already in a box with an address label on pages that are already printed and thus inadvisable to alter, and it also wouldn’t make sense for between the old pages and now that box to have been placed inside ANOTHER box that also had the address on it. At least in any other comic strip it wouldn’t, but there is already enough here that nobody but me understands so I need not introduce additional layers of that just so I can have a pointless “reveal” that I probably won’t get to for another two years that is nothing more than a pink box with a basket inside it!

Still the matter is unfortunate because this creature looks VERY stupid being proud of itself for holding that.



December 24, 2020
The term is associated with Scotland in the Early Modern Era, being attested from about 1600. The term was spelled dork or dirk during the 17th century,[4]

it has nothing to do with christmas but it is what I have. Very likely you will have to click on it to go to a more legible version, so be sure to not do that.


this attitude exists but the depicted situation is imaginary, since that is the only way anyone, even a dopey purple lizard, would invite that snake anywhere, and neither would likely be permitted in most dining establishments anyway, due to covid, naturally.

thanksh, instagram. You know what doesn’t prompt a “link to a health source”? actively encouraging the purchase and pouring of designer poisons into your mouth.

Early on I considered having the lizard be lope (the annoying lizard from the longer and deceptively ongoing comic strip), but I imagined that thing would totally commit to pretending to like alcohol and not admit it didn’t if it chose to do that. Also the pathetic snake exists is a somewhat more mundane world than lope does so that its experiences are slightly more relevant to reality. Lope would not have access to “beer” and would have to settle for something with a stupider made-up name like Glapzo.
it incorporates a composite of responses from an anonymous comment thread of people claiming to not be able to stand the taste of alcohol but drinking it anyway and not explaining why they would do that and seemingly not even realizing how little sense that makes, apart from one who claims to just be after a “buzz.” I would post specific examples but I don’t feel like entering image code and being reminded of other things to complain about for the rest of the day when this is already two days late! If you can drink it at ALL that means you CAN stand the taste, so your experience is different, unless you have willfully longterm suppressed your ability to taste it, which also means your experience is different since that is ridiculous to do unless you work in espionage or something like that and if you did you would have the discipline to resist leaking out bits of information related to it.

Some people live their whole lives like that, doing totally optional stuff they hate, acting like they don’t have a choice, and forced laughing while explaining it. I can’t stand that. Such as anyone who complains about having to watch idiotic commercialized “educational” television with their small children. YOU had the power to not expose your children to garbage. “oh i’m so out of shape since I haven’t been able to get to The Gym ha ha.” You can exercise anywhere! You don’t need to pay a membership fee to go to some dreadful over air-conditioned gender role-enforcing dump and be seen in embarrassing poses and clothing.
And I don’t want to hear about the long lines at disney world. Oh excuse me, at “Disney.” There are other less-attended theme parks that cost substantially less without being reasonably priced so you can still go fashionably into debt to arrange a trip and are probably closer to your home and don’t directly finance the acquisition and diluted overexposure of formerly tolerable media franchises! Ah oh or the advertisements on spotify. You can GET this music yourself and listen to it whenever you want in any order you want, and you can also listen to music that isn’t in spotify at all. I bring ear phones with me when I go shopping to save myself from having to complain about the terrible music in stores. I have no tolerance for bad food and bad music. I couldn’t pretend to like it if I wanted to, but I also couldn’t ever want to.



October 27, 2020
don’t forget to ask about upgrading to the hopper

11-2-2020 522pm: i make political posts regularly on the twitter website and it never gets me anywhere, since while I have nothing pleasant to say about Trump I can’t bring myself to praise Biden, either, and nobody cares if you have nuanced thoughts or doubts. and anyway the GARBAGE is so constant I don’t have time to make proper website posts about it, which is thus probably for the best!
//////////////////////


the comic strip pages that “will” comprise “book 4” have been touched up, re-lettered and reordered to mostly an extent that I feel is adequate. I say mostly because I decided actually getting them sorted out and in order and on the website and pushing down the previous utterly un-art-related website entry but that might appear to a casual observer as if I was taking credit for the plumbing company marketing I was actually complaining about was more important than correcting every single ancient graphical blemish that I just today realized I hadn’t fixed yet.
Also there are now thirty pages! It still seems like too few but it is more than there were.

as previously noted, there are two new pages, meant to come after what had previously been 62 and is now 49, but not immediately after, thus it being pushed back 13 spaces. There is also a new half page, partially on what is now 56 and what is now 60 but only of the existing very crowded content being spaced out more, and then the section ends a half-page later than it previously did, to rest on an actual revelation and not the robot idea that I ultimately did nothing with, still working out to end at the end of a page due to the restructuring I already mentioned!
consequently the next section starts a half page later than it previously did, but I filled the half page in a way that I initially hoped would aid clarity and presentation but may not have accomplished that, but since nothing was removed to make room for it, it does not necessarily make a great deal less sense than before.



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
Titash
pc72
Pickford
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

them`s fightin` woids: July 20, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
instead of dopesona i recommend “dopes oh no” to let everyone know to keep away from...
July 19, 2021
Charmlatan sez:
Fantastic! I’ve been meaning to make a “dope-sona”, but why stop there when I can *become*...
July 11, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
It does help that part 2 is a better game with generally more logical clues, and consequently...
July 9, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
I seem to no longer have the video file on my present hard drive but I took the screenshot at may...
July 9, 2021
A hooberdoober sez:
I would imagine the purpose of the multiple, differently-angled belts in the second image is...
July 8, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
because it is grey now
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