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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
August 17, 2018
Its developer, Nihilistic Software, was inspired by the God of War and Ninja Gaiden video games to create an experience featuring gore and nudity.


nemitz strikes it rich with a metal detector. it must be assumed that the metal detector is borrowed or stolen. and also that nemitz will be quite glad to dig that thing up and will offer to split the prize with anybody who helps.
A picture that I liked as a sketch, but could not fill in with enough details that I liked it finished. This contrasts with what usually happens, when I ruin the picture by trying to insert so many details that I overwhelm both the image and myself, though a point could be made about the incredibly large distraction on the lower left. That makes the tiny little distraction on the lower middle right seem too small, and not providing adequate counter-balance. But the nonsense objects I would generally fill space with, such as pine cones and pumpkins are already featured, and at a yet smaller size, on the vending machine’s buttons. Worse still, neither of the allusions inherent in the external objects is organic to me. I played the video game Dig Dug early in my life, but too early in fact to remember what the primary monsters looked like and I never came back to it until now. I had to look up both that thing’s appearance and even how the game works. Additionally, I do not think the Atari 2600 game “E.T. The Last Dinosaur” is any worse or dumber than the average bad atari 2600 game. I inherited a 2600 unit and a collection of game cartridges, including Dig Dug, from my cousins when they obtained a Nintendo Ehhh System. They probably had about the average assortment of games, including Adventure, Missile Command, Mario Bros and whatnot. There were a few that I could not make sense of but that could be attributed to my lack of age and experience at the time. When I got to emulating the 2600 system, however, the complete collection of roms included loads of terrible, obscure games that even as a moderately old person I could hardly figure out. Those likely comprise a majority of what was available for the 2600. ET only differs in that its cartridge was produced in great quantities. But I never had one!
Although I distinctly recall, in the game Pitfall, the character would be destroyed regardless of what point it attempted to jump across the alligators, and people still swear that was a “classic.” And I never found joy enough in emulating 2600 to do it more than once in ten years, and consequently the emulators I have for it don’t even work anymore, and I don’t feel like getting them to work just to provide another illustration for this website update.
I believe it is fair to blame nemitz for all of these things.



July 26, 2018
The Manager is a magical creature who takes the form of a puzzle man,


This is an exaggerated garbage idea that would be funny if i drew it like garbage instead of spending hours trying to draw it above my level, even though it still isn’t drawn particularly well.


additionally, the earliest saved sketch i have of it still is not funny, because I cannot draw badly in a way that looks functionally deliberate.
Such is the bimshwel existence.
The guy with sunglasses is not part of my initial pitch to myself, and that might also be a problem. If the idea works at all, that guy is not a part of it and explaining this makes it even less funny, but the rubbish I was writing that led me to think of this as a way of illustrating instead of spelling out, now plainly needs to be written anyway since this picture didn’t work so when I write that I will have no choice but to explain it. If necessary, I may even explain the previous sentence.



July 8, 2018
The gameplay consists of encountering and defeating wild creatures in order to obtain their phone numbers and store them on a mobile phone-like device.[7]

I wondered if I could work six unrelated sketchbook creatures into one coherent finishedish digital piece. I could not!

I did not attempt this previously since in most past years I used such large sketchbooks, 11×14 inches, that attempting to use EVERYTHING was infeasible and I did not attempt it. Now I use sad little ones and still barely have time enough to fill them, much less draw well in them.


here is the actual bad camera picture i used of the sketchbook page to draw over for the digital version. Notice first of all that the lighting on display is so bad that I cannot increase the contrast without whiting out the one on the upper right nor reduce the brightness without blacking out the lower left item. Even isolated without the other ones, I had to GUESS at the nature of my initial last-November intent with that one. In fact, months after taking this picture I had to dig out the pertinent book and find this page because I could not tell what that thing was supposed to be. And still afterward could not!
Even worse: I had to MIRROR one of the creatures! What scandal and horror. Consequently I like this better than most other drawings I put on the internet in the past year.



April 23, 2018
the agony booth is a most effective means of discipline


A highly not-yet-finished picture called “hats coming to visit.” there is an accompanying music piece… or rather i made some stupid minimally remarkable music, absentmindedly named it that, and then constructed a picture of a literal interpretation of those words. It is easier to post unfinished drawings and not feel bound to them than it is with unfinished music. The only reason the music is unfinished is because that dumb comic book is also destroying what little life i have unfinished and if I turn on the music program that will be an all day matter, potentially. Which apparently I do not want to risk, when there are so many totally meaningless tasks I can be doing for other people that are not satisfying the slightest bit and will take many days or weeks to finish.
I have a heap of resentment for people that I don’t consider to be “real artists” who post loads of drawings with minimal thought, effort or restraint on to the internet. By perhaps not chance, several of them play musical instruments or engage in digital audio tomfoolery. Sometimes I wonder if I am a hypocrite, for being a visual artist and occasionally pretending to be a musician. But I’m not because I assure you I spend loads longer on my noises than they do on their scribbles. You can’t be a popular music artist just by having an ugly squirrel/raccoon/dog thing for a mascot.
No actually probably you can; if you buy the expensive version of fl studio there are enough default filters that sound exactly like trash off the radio with minimal user input that an actual squirrel could probably design a hit track but I am obviously not doing that because those are all marked “demo” (and rather difficult to purge from and wholly unwelcome in my USABLE instrument list) in my version so it isn’t the same.

I do not mind there being demo versions of fancy music effects; I object to them not being able to be removed from a version of the program that is NOT a demo.
Try to imagine a middle finger in my face that cannot be removed from the vicinity of my face, that I paid $160 for, dangling a sign that says “gimme another hundred!” If you successfully imagined that, you may have a future in software development.

This is also the one year anniversary of my father’s demise, and the ten month anniversary of my not finishing the second post I wrote about that. although that isn’t really significant for an unposted piece around here until it reaches the ten year mark. In any event I think he would be glad to know I am just as unaccomplished and unfocused in my pursuits and just as inclined to blame people who did not cause my problems as when he was alive, were he alive, because that would mean he proved the impermanence of death, a matter sought after and never attained through the entire known existence of humanity, if not all life as we understand it. Of course THEN I would be disappointing by comparison to THAT, but everybody else would be, also, and my shortcomings would be less acute.


Look, there! He is imploring us to look there at a windmill. How could he do that if he were dead? The crushed ant corpse that I evidently neglected to notice was stuck to the photograph until a year after scanning it, THAT is what a dead being looks like.



April 1, 2018
As Adol listened to these atrocities, his blood raged and his adrenaline flowed.

The First Steps Toward Worship


featuring Adol “Born Again” Christin. There is no way that Adol’s deliveries can be over.



March 4, 2018
you look like you’re really on the ball

The lizard of two evils


in the disrespect that it looks very stupid and is also animated.

The dumbest thing is that the lizard thinks it has to change its pose to a broader stance with its arms crossed, like that will impress people, which is NOT the case. What that absurd moron fails to recognize is that nobody on earth or elsewhere is impressed. Not elpse. Not even the dope! nemitz, maybe, but i think we should all aim for better than that. It also seems unaware that its head is disproportionate to its body until it falls down since the square boundaries are difficult to optimize for an upright-standing figure. Or even a degenerate bow-legged dork like this one.

i absolutely did not need to make this. I considered that i had not animated anything recently, and also that my most-appreciated overall artwork have been low resolution pixel icons.


And apart from one that made before I knew what I was doing, they all feature other people’s characters. Some of which I do not like at all. Not necessarily any of those, though not necessarily not NOT any of those. And those that I dislike inspire other people with equally bland or worse requests to come to me instead of ones I could potentially find a mutually beneficial situation with. Which is not to say that i APPROVE of either of the morons that I am showing today, but i disapprove of them in a way that amuses me. Nor do I mean to suggest that I think drawing dumb garbage like this and then waiting is going to solve any problem, but I was starting to think that anything by me with wiggling creature toes being used as even a remote representation of myself, as I had done with the second icon here, was creating problems.

I could not tell you WHY there even is a problem that exists which is caused by that. I have lived a strange and unrealistic life, and that has its consequences.

If only life could be such a fantasy! It would surely be my final, were i to believe in it.



February 3, 2018
The ownership of the family house also changed. In the original series and The Munsters Today the Munsters owned the house but in this version they’re just house-sitting for Herman’s sister.


As a child (despite the maturity level I exhibit I am in fact quite older than that) i loved looking at pictures of castles and thinking about them, and for most of my life it bothered me that i could never draw them however hard i tried. now I realize I can, so long as I keep them implausible. I made this “quickly” in the past two hours so I would have something to upload this week. Practicality and scale were not major concerns.

I am not totally sure what this is, but it is the most sincere drawing I have put on the internet in some months. It needs some more creatures, but I could add creatures all night, and I am already committed to adding unnecessary details forever to a more pressing project.



January 23, 2018
The Disney game is built around the “arcade-style” gameplay, including fighting ghosts and shoveling coal into a fireplace.[1]

I checked and could not find any drawings, official or otherwise, of the two kids who let the Secret of Mana hero just fall down the waterfall, then run off and tell nobody, and are ANGRY when he survives. With friends like that, I am not surprised he starts slaughtering little yellow legless rabbit-things the first chance he gets.
I made this a bigger job than it needed to be, for something so stupid, and I screwed up much of it, but it is good practice, I have to hope. I am not terribly fond of it but I don’t have the energy to create and post something better, and the last brief entry I posted due to a lack of energy apparently didn’t work at all so this is here to distract from that. I meant to get into detail about what I screwed up in this picture, why I drew it to begin with and also show the basest sketch of it but somehow the topic turned into other Mana series games, namely Sword of Mana, which always leads to angry run-on sentences and precisely the sort of thing I am incapable of writing at the moment in a way that is the slightest bit amusing, so I will cross that bridge when I come to it and hopefully not be disappointed by the adventure that ensues once I fall off of it.



December 30, 2017
no pulse, no breath, cold as a cod. yes, thou art truly dead.


a drawing i started absentmindedly while my niece Violet was climbing on me, which limits the range of things I can work on, since Violet may want to bang on buttons or scribble something pink at any moment. This was never at risk of becoming WORSE.
I like to think the lower right one knows what it did to deserve that, but I have been so absentminded lately, I possibly forgot to inform it.
But why must NEMITZ be there, approving? the world does NOT need nemitz approval! Nemitz is also disproportionately larger than the other figures. Classical art analysis would indicate this to mean that nemitz is the most important person in the scene, and I absolutely assure you that is NOT the case, even in a case where nobody is important. In fact, especially so.

This is hardly a great illustration; it is extremely regressive, composition-wise, with all the figures on the same two dimensional plane


but the comic book matter is yet ongoing, continuing to consume much of my not-necessarily-wasted time, and the commissions I do (more than I exhibit here) remain somewhat homogeneous, and so I feel a need to show this thing that asserts I am not the person I look like I am if I only post commissions. People reached the exact same wrong conclusions about me in the past when I only made personally-directed stand-alone “art”work like this, as now when I rarely do, but now I have more of those people reaching. Which is “good” since it means more money and marginally more influence for me, provided I do not express any opinion on anything, which I accomplish by avoiding learning about anything that was made recently unless I have a connection to it which predates social media, such as star wars, or I learn about it off the internet, such as who Aunt Bee hated. I also have to avoid talking about my avoidance and what led to it because I start writing more or less the same manifesto that I have posted here repeatedly since whenever people started using tumblr, and I do not have the energy to make it funny to me anymore. I don’t think it much deserves the help, either!

I assure you this comment is just as weird when not removed from its original context



December 21, 2017
Each team was composed of members that were expected to dress and act like their Gilligan’s Island counterpart


I drew this on a whim back in October. It felt unfinished but I posted it anyway o the deviant art website because I am obsessive compulsive and “need”ed to upload something that day and had nothing else prepared.
Which is ludicrous because I am taking just as many pictures of just as much dumb stuff, if not more so, than 13 years ago when I probably updated this most often. But cataloging it seems less and less possible, and less worth the trouble since nobody reads anything that isn’t text captioned in a video anyway, even if the video is just still images. As if reading is hard unless you can only see ten words at a time, and then you can spend 6 minutes on one paragraph. That picture has no words at all which theoretically makes it easier to read. These words are not the image’s and they resent the implication that they do not belong to themselves.



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
Titash
pc72
Pickford
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

them`s fightin` woids: August 6, 2018
Dhraiden sez:
Do you want imps infesting the internets, because this is you get imps infesting the internets...
August 5, 2018
Frimpinheap sez:
Nobody is invited! The location has been quarantined. We need to keep the dumb imps and their...
August 4, 2018
Creeply critter sez:
Oooh. This makes me feel like I am invited for some mischief. No! Must resist!
August 2, 2018
Frimpinheap sez:
It has doom programming at its core but it is not working within doom’s limits, apart...
August 2, 2018
Purplespace sez:
That looks hilarious! I can hardly believe that’s the same game as Doom!
July 30, 2018
Frimpinheap sez:
This is NOT about cartoon porn, as I said in the text here, and every other place where I posted...
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