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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
May 19, 2018
A yellow arrow means that the protection of a green arrow is ending


bow and arrogance
A rather large (230×230) pixel commission for Egger Righteous of a creature who believes that archery is not challenging enough.
(I also forgot to draw anything holding the quiver in place, don’t tell)

The last time I posted an unusual animated gif I made for somebody other than me, I mentioned that I appreciated the variety, ended up going on about how if I post too many drawings that are similar, people who are sexually aroused by it assume I also am and talk to me in an unpleasant manner and possibly send me pictures of themselves unprompted. I want to avoid doing that again because shortly afterward that specific person sent me MORE creepy pictures of himself or or somebody unprompted, and if I keep going I will actually show one and I don’t want to do that. It isn’t explicit but it is ugly and I do not want it on my page.


in fact I did not even want that person’s icon in my telegram lump so I added a bunch of fake drafts to other people I was NOT sending messages to just to scroll it out of view. I of course cannot remove the person completely since telegram deletes your message history if you remove contacts and I need evidence of the full story in case I am murdered and do not want to actually LOOK at that evidence for the purposes of making copies at this time.



March 20, 2018
hey mr. pinstripe suit, hey mr. heidi heidi ho

I have many stories to tell and pictures for most of them but no energy to pound them into coherence.


a animated pixel commission icon for bats of, what else, a chicken person named Bwengo, who does not appear at all pleased about it.

I thought at first that I would not be able to draw this at all, especially considering the state of the reference images which had been illustrated by a third party who is obsessed with drawing gross things, or non-gross things in a gross way. People eat that up. I don’t know why. I can’t eat something that looks gross. Which of course can be in your favor when you resemble a chicken, but once again I seem to be in an extreme minority here. But I found a way to draw it which was not gross, and since there are almost 0 chicken human hybrid enthusiasts on the internet this animation will not be circulated among them so that I get a superficial increase in viewership whose goal is to find the part of the drawing(s) about which I am least comfortable and try to convince me to quadruple down on it for them for less money and then either shun me when I refuse or worse, NOT shun me and keep at it. This isn’t one of the stories I am too tired to tell! This is one of the stories that contributes to me being too tired to talk about anything more potentially entertaining! Creepy people used to be FUNNY to me. But now that they are creepy directly TO me, to try and make ME creepy, my only defense is to become BORING instead!


Yes this was almost two years ago, when melt-fetishists thought *I* must be a melt fetishist because I drew animations of things melting because I thought it was funny, and I have kept future incidents from happening with foot fetish people who thought *I* was a foot fetish person because I thought feet were funny, but I kept them from happening by changing into a boring person who says nothing strange or ambiguous, and I stopped THINKING in a strange way, even in venues totally unrelated to me trying to get money for artwork without pursuing it through legitimate channels. Even though the fact that people read my humor as perversion and my actual perversion as banality is the strangest thing of all.

I was talking to this person for hours just because it was so bizarre and I could hardly believe that somebody was sending me all these weird pictures and videos, mixed in with totally innocuous clips of stuff filmed underwater and from a helicopter. And I subconsciously changed my entire public persona just to stop that from happening again. Bloody rubbish. Please don’t send me pictures of bloody rubbish.

The fact of the madder is that “normal” people get really weird when they are sexual, and under just the wrong circumstances, they interpret my latent aversion to typicality as eroticism.

Possibly related, people on the internet who boast about being “weird” are painfully typical. Also, just to be clear/boring, THIS person is not the one who was sending me rubber pictures without an invitation. I have no specific memory of what this person did. Because this person ISN’T WEIRD. Or IS, relative to the complete history of humanity, but not compared to every other boring person it knows in 2018.


Gosh looking at this now it appears that I only drew half of the nose ring during the pecking part. Oops. I merely forgot to finish shading it but the effect is the same since it is visible so briefly that its impression is partly subliminal. It seems like there is one big dark nostril on one side and not the other. I had been trying NOT to look at the animation between when I declared it done and this point since I was worried I would see something that I had a little problem with and treat it like a huge problem. But this IS a BIG problem. But I already posted this on the sharing sites; anybody who was going to see this already has. If I fix that, nobody will ever know! What a tragedy. Except for you dear viewer! For you and for me I will fix it. Yes yes yes. In fact I already did. There is no reason to have the picture of the wrong frame here! Get that out of here!



March 6, 2018
These are the two mouthy and cowardly frogs seen periodically throughout the Sewer Access in 2300 AD.


This looks familiar. I thought it prudent to find a way to make this look dumber so I could post it on faceboof, where animated gifs are justifiably not permitted.



March 4, 2018
you look like you’re really on the ball

The lizard of two evils


in the disrespect that it looks very stupid and is also animated.

The dumbest thing is that the lizard thinks it has to change its pose to a broader stance with its arms crossed, like that will impress people, which is NOT the case. What that absurd moron fails to recognize is that nobody on earth or elsewhere is impressed. Not elpse. Not even the dope! nemitz, maybe, but i think we should all aim for better than that. It also seems unaware that its head is disproportionate to its body until it falls down since the square boundaries are difficult to optimize for an upright-standing figure. Or even a degenerate bow-legged dork like this one.

i absolutely did not need to make this. I considered that i had not animated anything recently, and also that my most-appreciated overall artwork have been low resolution pixel icons.


And apart from one that made before I knew what I was doing, they all feature other people’s characters. Some of which I do not like at all. Not necessarily any of those, though not necessarily not NOT any of those. And those that I dislike inspire other people with equally bland or worse requests to come to me instead of ones I could potentially find a mutually beneficial situation with. Which is not to say that i APPROVE of either of the morons that I am showing today, but i disapprove of them in a way that amuses me. Nor do I mean to suggest that I think drawing dumb garbage like this and then waiting is going to solve any problem, but I was starting to think that anything by me with wiggling creature toes being used as even a remote representation of myself, as I had done with the second icon here, was creating problems.

I could not tell you WHY there even is a problem that exists which is caused by that. I have lived a strange and unrealistic life, and that has its consequences.

If only life could be such a fantasy! It would surely be my final, were i to believe in it.



November 29, 2017
The super part of Man of Steel is just okay, but the man part is super.”[139]


Three 100×100 pixel icons for Sherymon.

One more for beepy isopod plushcub.

Anything else I am doing right now is boring and not worth mentioning. I know because I just typed it all out and it sure was! I am not going to post something long and negative again unless it is negative in an interesting way or I forget that I said this. Of course I believe I have said that before and forgotten it.

even Superman sometimes forgets that there are thousands of other garishly-dressing idiots with super powers on his version of Earth and also the simultaneously existing alternate versions of earth that also have alternate versions of him on them. And also to put on a shirt, or to NOT wear glasses and a goshdarn belt buckle identifying his alternate identity when forcibly evicting trees from his property.



November 12, 2017
After a hilarious sleepover, a visit to a zoo rainforest exhibit, and Norman’s attempts to teach Fluffy karate, the three plants team up to foil some bad guys.

A commission animation “icon” for goldquiver, showing a bat creature which transforms into a plant creature, and then back again, and then unback again, and on like that for a very long time. Feel free to wait.
I have proved with my comic pages that I can spend a week and show very little. With this I dedicated to show even less happening!

They ALWAYS smile at the end. They NEVER think whatever painful thing they just experienced will EVER happen again, no matter HOW many times it repeats. Fools!



November 5, 2017
Problem Inspection Report on Pocket Monster Animated Series

This website has not been very fun lately! It takes too long to write fun things, and then miserable bits always creep into them. And I have made no further progress on the automated “store,” and wonder if I will. I have difficulty focusing on things for which I cannot constantly have results to look at. It does not feel like my “destiny.” When people try to get me to write “a children’s book,” that does not feel right, either.

Apparently amateurish looping animations of other peoples’ characters is my “destiny.” Or maybe that is a non-destiny less apart from what is, and easier to justify and manage the short term effort in.


for scraner, this happy, dorkular figure, with an ear that I was told looks like a feather but is not a feather. It has difficulty fitting in due to its unusual appearance and acts out in a sometimes inappropriate manner in an attempt to get attention. Unlike other recent “icon” commissions, this was drawn in Flash SWF format, and it certainly looks like it was.

Yet I have to display it as a gif with three times the file size and reduced color fidelity since modern browsers are increasingly hostile toward efficient vector-based drawings — in fact SWF means “small web format” — blocking them by default and requiring manual, two-step permission to show one, from viewers who might assume anything blocked by default with no explanation is inherently dangerous. Mobile systems never even bothered to implement support for swf. It is 1996 technology, after all. So instead we use gifs, which are from 1987. Where were these pocket overprotectors back in 2004 when every corporate website was using SWF to play obnoxious laggy noisy pop-up videos without permission? Now that big money scumbags are done with them, NOW we get to acknowledge that creeps can embed viruses in them.



Now that I am the last creep using them. Now that I have a computer powerful enough to actually have a animated flash swf open on a page without everything else getting screwed up. Now that I have stopped posting links to my website on forums full of people I would actually want to inflict viruses on were I competent to insert one.


We can all agree that punches to bow tie meeps would be highly inadvisable to block, in any decade.



October 29, 2017
If your use of Graphic Workshop is predicated upon its being able to read your ART files, we strongly urge you to run Graphic Workshop and the ART plugin against your ART files to make sure that everyone involved is talking about the same ART.

Following from that old thing, here is the sort of material people have been asking me for lately. You may be better off not reading the text!



mitz opportunity
Somewhere in 2015 I had to make a 80×80 pixel icon to accompany my comic strip’s link on some outdated web-comic list that nobody has looked at in years. To justify the icon’s existence and permit it to be used on almost any other website, I subsequently increased the icon to 100×100 pixels. Later I added a useless animation to it for approximately no reason. And later I made the ears wiggle in an insufferable manner. Who does that mitz think it is?
I drew the initial 6 frames in paint shop pro version 6 circa 1999, as separate images. It worked for this but felt inefficient.



boxed bot
Unfortunately it inspired wimpod, whose creature also turned into one of these.
I tried to make edits in photoshop after I had already assembled it, and that is a terrible program to edit gifs in because there is no way to look at the next frame and also activate the next frame for editing without moving the mouse and clicking on two different things every time. Rubbish!
I hear that the newest photoshop has a less stupid animation mode. However, it is also subscription only, which means you pay for it until you die and never really own your copy of the software, and adope can arbitrarily cut you off from it whenever and for whatever reason it feels like. It probably won’t but it could.


aki-breaky bug
some months later this came along, for AtlasImperial of another suspicious character, a moth-oid named Aki. This required independent moving parts so I tried using my recently installed Clip Studio, which has a powerful animation mode. Unfortunately, it has absolutely no animation specific keyboard shortcuts and will only paste as new layers, but cannot merge layers at ALL in animation mode because [no reason], and it is very stupid and inconvenient for maintaining crucial consistency; for example, though the feet move, there will often be a foot part that is supposed to be the same between multiple frames, but if I change it in one place, I cannot copy the changed part and update other frames with it, which means I must meticulously redraw the edit several times, which requires manually mouse clicking the previous frame to check and then manually mouse clicking back to where I was and then moving the cursor to the part I was drawing at since there is no single button command for switching the active frame. Also! Clip Stupido cannot save transparent gifs, even though it handles transparency and in fact refuses to NOT erase into transparent on single layer images that are supposed to have a solid background color. I assure you what I just said makes makes sense and is very annoying. I had to implement the transparency in photoshop, to all 48 frames, which was a total nightmare. And then I had to do that a few more times when I changed something else. There are 48 frames even though the most complex part, the moving foot, only has 8 frames, since other things move out of synch with it. 48 was the lowest number at which it matched up with the other movements.


I’ve Fallen and Icon Get Up
Nonethless I did these, for Trevor-Fox and also Tachisalopex. They are plainly quite busy so I will try not to say too much.


pip my ride

for Pippy Batstocking. I got the impression that this is just as much attention to the feet as was called for. I thought: I have this clip stupido figured out, I will do the next thing people ask for in that also. I made sure all the moving parts linked up. It was not as bad but it was still a bad idea!


infern vermin
For roshiyu: a rat wizard person plays around with a little blue fireball FOREVER.
As soon as I learned the details of the task I realized I needed better software to be able to pull it off, and found aseprite shortly thereafter. I gave up on making this work as transparent. Aseprite handles it better, but eh website, furra finity, cuts of user avatars at the intuitive size of 55 kilobytes, and this would blatantly go over, since gifs are stupid. Thankfully I discovered that I like colors better anyway.


murid murderer

For mightyrat, also in aseprite. Showing a friendly creature named Twitch the Plague Rat, jumping and then toe-exhibiting, all while clutching a mysterious, presumably lethal beverage in such a way that suggests it may be tossed at somebody whose company is not desirable.

the fox in our stars

A fox person with magical powers meditates in a space-sort of location.
I have a lot to say about this one, and so I shan’t.

microsurgeon
For plaguerattus, a rat person that is rat-sized despite wearing clothing and having human characteristics, and consequently uses a ex-acto knife as a weapon, and also lives a life of such peril as to require a weapon, which apparently sees a great deal of usage. Or maybe this is from back when I had one and stored it in my bag without putting a cap on it, because I think they just didn’t MAKE caps for the things then, and I reached into the bag expecting to grab something else, and for months afterward had intense anxiety about reaching into ANY bag for ANY reason, even after an airline worker ordered me to dispose of it. Don’t tell anybody that my authentic staff-spinning reference material was Cheetara from Thundercats.


the good, the bad, and the bowtie
A rather large pixel animation commission for Lizzy MajP Ampharos. A stupid yellow lizard thing which I must confess looked mildly less punchable than this before I got a hold of it. That thing is FAR prouder of itself than it has any right to be, even without the bowtie. And there could easily BE no bowtie since I forgot to draw it tied in place. Yet it lingers.
Why larger, I do not know. I was able to keep this under control a bit better than the non-animated large pixel drawings, but those were still twice the size of this one. I was not asked to include a background, and I should not have included one that inadvertently mimicked the shape and color of the ears. There are enough inexcusable ears on this page without me implying more of them.


rodentia brush yer hair?

for Akvo, in which a rat person endures a hairrowing ordeal. People do love their rat folk. I do not know why people want ME to draw their rat folk, but I like those better than bears or otters.
This suddenly looks under-animated to me; the pieces do not have an extra settling frame after the abrupt turns, but the amount of things TO animate here is higher than usual, and I tend to give more than I need to, so I must have felt haggard up if I did not.
The fur trim on the jacket and the pink hair especially were difficult to get looking right, and I had to paste them into Clip Stupido to work on, and then paste back into aseprite. Clippo’s animation mode is terrible but its drawing mode is great. Aseprite’s animation mode is great and its drawing is terrible. It does not use pressure sensitivity in tablet pens and is inexplicably slow and lagful even though I tend to work on pictures that are lower in color depth and one-fiftieth the resolution that I work on in other software. Is there a program that accommodates bitmap drawing AND animation well? Probably, and it most of a certainly does something else more important disgracefully for no reason, like it will have passwords instead of saving, or you can only use shades of beige or you have to guess a magical gnome’s name in order to access the full version.


deflotter

For Jazz Otter, of a rather exhausted air-filled creature. I doubt I could sleep so peacefully knowing that there were scissors in the world.
Twitter seemed to like this, which makes sense: nothing is happening, I did not draw it especially well nor especially enjoy doing do. I did like making the movements, though there were not many, and in fact I had to un-do some of the excessive movements that I added. But it is all good for something: several relatively influential people that I think are complete garbage but who my situation render inescapable, who would never ever directly acknowledge me in a coherent medium where they could tell that it was me who had made these things, have “like”d or retwutted some of them, so even though I still feel like a drimpy sub-human pudding being that will never reach a substantial audience with the work that is meaningful to me, I can at least feel like I “beat” some irritating forklogans in an incredibly petty and stupid way that is exactly what we both deserve.

Second-Hand Dork
And finally this one last week-ish, for kingodin, of Jordan Deere, a one-eyed creature with the unfortunate addictive habit of brandishing bow ties. I get the impression Kingodin has seen some of my other icon animations.
I think it has more and better movement than most of the others, though it has no shading. Truthfully, getting the lines solid and smoothed out is most of the work. However, most of the recognition, apparently, is in the shading (as well as most of what I charge, like an idiot, like a usual). Or perhaps people object to cigar-smoking. Or perhaps they object to inaccurately-drawn cigar-smoking: I realized after I made this that real cigar smoke goes everywhere and takes its time leaving, quite the opposite. People should be GLAD I sent it off so fast. Although smoke can look elegant. Perhaps people wish the rest of it looked as elegant as the smoke!

So what have I learned through all this? That I can always learn nothing in a new way. My shoe is off, my foot is cold, I have a bird I like to hold. My hat is old, my teeth are gold, and now my story is all told.



April 3, 2017
Tin Woodman was a hardened criminal so heartless he was sentenced to be placed in a tin suit for eternity. The torture of being encased in the suit had softened him and made him gentle and kind.


Sure to be the most important 80 seconds of your life.
The proper flash vector version can be seen right over here, unless you are using a telephone, since telephones do not like it, and for good reason, I say.
The previous part can be seen at there and the flash version is probably there but I am not going to check on that!
Without meaning to I hoped this would be the release that convinced people I was not just a bum pretending to have some useful skill, which would at last permit me to breakthrough to the next level of unobscurity. It is rough in some parts, due to being made in a strange way in a strange program, also I repeatedly forgot to go back and draw Greegorp’s legs properly in the part where they are visible and strange even though that very part is plainly visible in a previous recent post here, but I think the good parts in it are the proof I sought. In the end it convinced as many people as the snake cartoon, which is to say, nobody who was not already on board, but I think my technique has improved overall, and whatever the case it is was necessary for my psychological state to move forward on this. As always, I need to know I made it more than anybody else needs to see it!



February 20, 2017
I go and stay a while and all the folks I meet they say you won’t stay long you got them travelin’ feet



A totally contextless and silent piece of something I have been working on. Initially I instituted bizarre movements in the overall production to distract from my unwillingness and inability to animate mouths. But recently it came to pass that I started animating the mouths anyway, which seems like it will render the completed product more presentable to others, but without making it unsightly to me, because ultimately I want people apart from myself to like this stuff that I spend years on, right? Yes, I do, and mouths are golly geeby gupty important to them. I am not very GOOD at it, but the mouth-work on Garfield and Friends was even worse and that stayed on the air for eight years. This only needs to be tolerable for eighty seconds. However, I will miss the order and balance that an absence of mouth movements brings about, especially since the way I do it, I need to redraw the whole head for each frame, rather than reusing the same one, so I use that as justification for showing this right here now. Also, I have no time to write anymore! I tried and it was bad, and sad. I cannot write non-sad things while I am worried, and I am worried about all the non-writing I need to finish. I am also worried about not having a website post ready. I would need to write it while I was not in need of one, which I can only do when I am not worried about unfinished beet matters. I am actually not worried about beets, but rather the things that I have not started doing because I have not been sufficiently worried about beets to complete their projects. However, I would BECOME worried about beets if I imagined I no longer cared about finishing them.



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
Titash
pc72
Pickford
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

them`s fightin` woids: May 26, 2018
Grammar sez:
That was my fault.
May 24, 2018
Purplespace sez:
Blue and pink lizard friends are the best kind!
May 22, 2018
Heapinfrimp sez:
It was your grammar which was unclear. “Irregular to practice, utilizing expressed disgust...
May 21, 2018
The Meaning sez:
Just some out loud thoughts about dealing with the situation, in the boring and obvious way....
May 20, 2018
Frimpinheap sez:
I am unable to determine what you are talking about at this time.
May 20, 2018
Frimpinheap sez:
He certainly is not an obese man.
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    The same
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