March 23, 2009

I link to my old pages too much.


I remember, a year and pieces ago, I was trapped in a car for several hours going toward a sinister destination and the radio operator gave me a break from the same dumb cds I’d heard countless times recently and instead brought up a station comprised of songs I had heard countless times not recently. Or recently, but in the context of a “retro” or “throwback” media item not indicative of society’s tastes in general for anything other than retro throwbacks.

So, almost every 1980s song I heard in that car started with the exact same DIP DAH DIP DAH DIPN DOT drum introbe. There were a good (well, adequate) few years when I was convinced the 1980s music I used to like was of a nearly consistent higher quality than the modern rubbish constantly flinging itself at me. This was maybe 1998 – 2001ish. Now I realize it’s pretty much all simplistic repetive formulaic nonsense. Thank you, culture of regurgitation, for not permitting me to not be reminded always! And yet still I identified “Electric Avenue” in under two seconds, even though it’s doubtful I’d heard it more than three times prior to then. But then, most of these are the sort where when you’ve heard them once you’ve pretty much heard everything it can throw at you three times. They have minutes to fill. OUT! IN THE STREET! Also, Private Idaho, which only has two past exposures. While preferable to moment without an end!, some trashy ska song I heard one time –under unusual circumstance not involving a radio station or the particular set of tiresome CDs I’m used to being tired of– and probably never will again, whose obscurity likely means you will not hear it ever, and there’s no sense in complaining about it, or letting my complaints about detract from the more prevalent threat, I forgot how this sentence started.

[x4]! That’s not even a song, it’s an arena chant. What a bad bad band. DEET DEET DEET DEET DEET DEET great beat, guys. I hope you don’t get sued by birds. I’d love to hear it for five minutes and then another five minutes when the next track starts. Over that I’d like to hear a basic note sequence three times followed by a fourth that’s slightly different.

This is not good. I’m forming this sort of opinion on all possible things. My tastes are impossible to satisfy. It may be unreasonable of me to expect to be satisfied. Why, were I in the business of employing double-negatives for my business I might go so far as to suggest that I cain’t get no- ARRRRRRRGH I HATE THAT SONG TOO!

Somebody who I was aware of once linked those who were aware of him to an abysmal Naruto-branded vague contextless clipfest and I couldn’t concentrate on how abysmal it was because the music bothered me so much. It was a garbage techno remix of the first half of everyone’s favorite “scary” disgraced public domain orchestra piece that isn’t Ride of the Valkyries, In the Hall of the Mountain King, but artificially elongated by using extra repetitions which made it totally intolerable. People can’t comprehend music with more than a bit of variation in too short a period, and they’re too weak to write new music, so they dumb up old stuff to suit their needs. Yes, I know that. Overclocked Remix is almost ten years old, isn’t it? But this one baffled me… It’s not as if that particular Peer Gynty excerpt is an article of music that’s hard to make disgusting by pairing with unimaginative drivel.
12-21-2010: that video is no longer there and I have forgotten what it was! I was deliberately vague in describing it for better effect so now nobody can know!

Bride Wars

A theatrick trailer for the 2009 feature film Bride Wars, oh right, nevermind that first of all is from Bride Wars, but also shows the scene where the brides have had enough bride trade sanctions and start fighting, physically. So we’ve already seen the one bride war, and we realize the plurality in the title is inaccurate, and the movie hasn’t come out yet. The war is over. Dragon was robot And it’s just dumb fickle text-messaging marriage-enthusiasts, more concerned with wearing just the right window curtains on just the right day in November with just the right irrelevant flowers and just the right conflict-seeking redneck cousins in attendance than the serious legal agreement they are entering into, and will inevitably suffer from entering it with fickle goals and expectations, and they have that music. You spend 30 million dollars on the awful thing and you can’t pay a person to write as many seconds of proper fight music.

Somebody should have told the director that.

I wish I could show you that this was also the talk show clip, but just that one scene, in its entirety, with that music, and then with the audience having to applaud afterward. The pinnacle of the film, that which the whole thing should be building up to, and it was still awful, and the publicity campaign (henceforth referred to as “you”) showed it for free, with the expectation that this would encourage me to run out drop dollars to see that movie whose lame apex you just showed lamely (“you” now reverts to its previous owner). It was one of the saddest things I’d ever seen. It was even sadder than going quite out of one’s way to create and arrange a comic strip to fit in a specific published book format and then putting it on a free, formless web page because it ended up only being kind of good. It was yet more sad than spending many hours of many days writing the sort of pointless thing whose climax might be a description of the climax of Bride Wars. I would avoid anybody who did both those things, though.

And now I am quite sad. I am sad that this sequence of thoughts is only about one third over. I was unprepared for realizing that I dislike the music I grew up with every bit as much as the music kids “today” are growing up with and that kids before me grew up with to bring so many of my other resentments together.


4 Responses
  1. 1
    6:17 am, March 25, 2009

    Eater of Tar sez:

    You know, for someone who alleges not to speak any German, you sure do spend a lot of time in the German-speaking parts of the internet.

    Speaking of speaking, I always hated the word “bride”. It makes me think of being forced to eat a bag of cotton balls (without a beverage, no less). And it seems I’m scarcely the only one to hold this opinion (the generally distaste, not the cotton ball imagery), for when my sister became marinated (sans much of the standard hoopla, and certainly without a frilly window curtain as a costume), she insisted on being referred to as the “schwoom” so to avoid having this term applied to her.

    That said, I suppose that precisely due to its unpleasantness, the word actually is somewhat fitting for those who revel in all the afforementioned inane trappings that bad romantic comedies are made of, often to the distress of all others who surround them. If we absolutely must have ugly words, we might as well apply them to ugly situations.

  2. 2
    4:47 pm, March 25, 2009

    Fleeplezeep sez:

    I had not set out to find that particular version of the preview, and didn’t even want the preview, in fact, but once I had, I decided it was preferable to the alternative. I already didn’t understand the necessity of Bride Wars, so to additionally not understand the dialogue brings just a bit more pleasant order and harmony to my life.

    I never thought much about the word “bride;” but I have no need for it usually so I am not averse to including it among the words I don’t like. And ehhh, it does remind me of bridle, which first reminds me of horse riding, a thing I always found ugly, and then it reminds me of that time I couldn’t win King’s Quest II because I didn’t use the bridle in the right place. Seriously, what gives, bride?

  3. 3
    11:50 am, June 24, 2014

    Anonymous sez:


    I’m sorry for my English but I speak French …
    I saw this beautiful art on your site ( and I am super fan daimakaimura and I’d like to know, or did you find? I would like to know the designer and see if I can get one ….

    a big thank you in advance ….

  4. 4
    11:50 am, June 24, 2014

    Anonymous sez:


    I’m sorry for my English but I speak French …
    I saw this beautiful art on your site ( and I am super fan daimakaimura and I’d like to know, or did you find? I would like to know the designer and see if I can get one ….

    a big thank you in advance ….([email protected])

feed comments.

Leave a comment. If you want to.

Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

them`s fightin` woids: August 15, 2019
Frimpinheap sez:
Better watch out, there’s a lemon about.
August 15, 2019
Frimpinheap sez:
I only learned about you perhaps a week ago so it was not necessary for me to remember you for...
August 15, 2019
Wizpig sez:
No one’s supposed to remember me! I’m even less well-known than that...
August 3, 2019
Frimpinheap sez:
When Rugrats debuted, it was unusual and people did not know what to expect because nickelodeon...
August 3, 2019
pindohodo sez:
I think some designs are just too stylized to be transitioned to the third dimension without...
August 3, 2019
pindohodo sez:
“Why?” indeed! But I have to admit that Lemons 2:The Limes gave me a little chuckle
Less recent posts
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014
  • March 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
  • December 2013
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • September 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • February 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012
  • October 2012
  • September 2012
  • August 2012
  • July 2012
  • June 2012
  • May 2012
  • April 2012
  • March 2012
  • February 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • November 2011
  • October 2011
  • September 2011
  • August 2011
  • July 2011
  • June 2011
  • May 2011
  • April 2011
  • March 2011
  • February 2011
  • January 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • October 2010
  • September 2010
  • August 2010
  • July 2010
  • June 2010
  • May 2010
  • April 2010
  • March 2010
  • February 2010
  • January 2010
  • December 2009
  • November 2009
  • October 2009
  • September 2009
  • August 2009
  • July 2009
  • June 2009
  • May 2009
  • April 2009
  • March 2009
  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • September 2008
  • August 2008
  • July 2008
  • June 2008
  • May 2008
  • April 2008
  • March 2008
  • February 2008
  • January 2008
  • December 2007
  • November 2007
  • October 2007
  • September 2007
  • August 2007
  • July 2007
  • June 2007
  • December 2004

  • May 2007
    April 2007
    March 2007
    February 2007
    January 2007
    December 2006
    November 2006
    October 2006
    September 2006
    August 2006
    July 2006
    June 2006
    May 2006
    April 2006
    March 2006
    February 2006
    January 2006
    December 2005
    November 2005
    October 2005
    September 2005
    August 2005
    July 2005
    June 2005
    Maypril 2005
    March 2005
    February 2005
    January 2005
    Novcember 2004
    October 2004
    September 2004
    August 2004
    July 2004
    Maune 2004
    April 2004
    Febrarch 2004
    January 2004
    December 2003
    Octvember 2003
    Augtember 2003
    Junly 2003
    Maypril 2003
    Febrarch 2003
    Octnovdecjan 20023
    Junulgustember 2002
    Maypril 2002
    This never happened

    old webpages
    Mall Meh...ness
    I do not approve.
    irrational complaining about my television set
    Dennises are dead to me
    This page is not about shoes.
    I hate shoes.
    something award related
    Those Green Eyes again
    More valid but unfunny Disney criticism
    Biggest Loser
    Mall Blandness
    2004 advertisement complaint world championship
    Mall Egadness
    Las Vegas
    Spiderman 2
    Jope and Dopes
    These Green Eyes
    Game Over
    Mall orneryness
    Movies I'm not going to see
    Back fashion school to
    Movies Make Me Mad. Moreso.
    Official pizza of Nascar
    Michael Jackson
    Free Speech
    Film Critics. I hate them.
    Coconuts. I hate those as well.
    Independence Day
    Some time in July 2001
    video games
    Runaway Rainbow
    Marsupilami part 1
    Marsupilami part 2
    Spirou part 1
    Spirou part 2
    Cosmo's Cosmic Adventure!
    Kirby part 1
    Kirby part 2
    Kirby part 3
    Dynamite HeaddY
    McDonald's Treasureland Adventure
    Pac in Time part 1
    Pac in Time part 2
    Air Fortress
    Super Widget
    Back to the Forest (the skunny page)
    Tintin and the Prisoners of the Sun
    Bip Bop II
    2001, a space waste
    Barney's Hide and Seek "Game"
    too late to make a difference
    Moraff's Dungeons of the Unforgiven
    before the one above it
    Super Games Galore! Doy!
    other things
    Awards this website hasn't won
    The first First Beet segment
    Embarrassing pictures 1
    Embarrassing pictures 2
    The same
    Umiliphus (my old derivative megamen sprite comic
    11/24/04, (I can only justify this by calling it an experiment, so I shall)
    Poetry Page
    The same