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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
November 9, 2023
In a Breton legend, Mark of Cornwall is also the king of Cornouaille, where, one day, he hunted a doe before discovering she was, actually, the princess Dahut.

Sheeran was exonerated for copyright infringement, or something of that nature, supposedly. I certainly hope so, I can’t fathom that he heard songs this bad and decided THESE are what I will lie about having made.
But that is fine if YOU like them, if you actually bothered to read any of this. You are real to me and i appreciate you for that.

//////////////////

JOHN LEGEND

AN EVENING

WITH

A NIGHT
OF SONGS AND STORIES

when I saw this last week my eyes rolled so hard i almost went off the road. It is trying so hard to seem folksy and humble that it is obviously neither. he gives his stage name as “legend” for fleep’s beep. yet he isn’t creative enough to not be john.

I went to the website for foxwhoops (the casino at which this event is to occur) trying to find a picture of the billboard since, at that time, I thought it would be unsafe to take a photograph while driving, and later realized it was just ineffectual. but THAT says


JOHN LEGEND
AN EVENING WITH JOHN LEGEND
which comes across as somewhat less pretentious, if redundant.
However it shows the same “humble piano player with back to viewer in monochrome” photograph, and makes sure I know how many egots he won. and also that he is the first African American Man to win one

obviously I am not in the target audience, since even with Johnny Leg’s disco graphy in front of me, I don’t recognize any songs. That may even be in his favor to a degree but I still don’t want to pay twenty four thousand dollars or less for the right to hear them in person.

it reminded me of when I ended up on a terrible “screenrant” page last week

“the room is terrible” says conan o’brien
what a vague bizarre headline. it tricked me. it was designed to trick people and shove ads at them, not inform or entertain them. i disapprove of that business model. then the content of the story is like:

conan o’brien, the iconic, award-winning talk show host, sat down with the iconic, award-winning musician ed sheeran to discuss the iconic, award-winning cartoon series the simpsons

the simpsons, the iconic, award-winning cartoon series, has had many writers over the years, such as the iconic, award-winning talkshow host conan o’brien, who sat down with iconic, award-winning musician ed sheeran recently.

ed sheeran, the iconic, award-winning musician, recently sat down with the iconic, award-winning talkshow host conan o’brien and turned the tables on the iconic, award-winning talk show host to ask a question about the iconic, award-winning animated series “the simpsons.”

the phrase “award winning” instantly turns me into a skeptic if I wasn’t already. It is very much a phrase for marketing and for bad writers to fill space with. Do you have nothing to say? Just verbally lick the hindquarters of celebrities and list off their awards and other celebrities they have met, and you’ll have six intellectually barren paragraphs to surround your one scrap of new frivolous information in doh time. I even like Conan and have taken inspiration from him in some ways but I know from direct experience of hearing an offensively low effort generic bad song, looking it up out of pure anger and learning Sheeran was responsible, multiple times, that Ed is aggressively talentless.


breaking news: marginally talented irritating charlatans have a vested interest in keeping each other’s gravy trains going
I might become a “flat earth” adherent just to protest this piece of global news.

Everything about this guy has the aim of conditioning people to accept and pay for mediocrity. In 2019 in a london tube station I saw an enormous poster presented in this exact manner, presumably regarding the same product, but I did not photograph it since I didn’t want to seem as if i approved. also i was following nine other people, hauling excessive quantities of baggage and likely holding somebody else’s coffee cup and/or water bottle with the hand that should have been free and definitely wasn’t going to hold everyone up for dumb old ed sheeran when he doesn’t even care.
Why doesn’t he? And why should thousands of people trying to get to their trains have to be told that he doesn’t care? What he DOES care about is getting his name and the name of his mediocre cronies listed as frequently as possible.
He cares so little that he just “drops” shoddy songs and expects me to pick them up. I appreciate him linking himself to bruno mars though since the last time I heard a bad sheeran song in the supermarket I assumed Mars was responsible and only when seeking proof learned it was sheeran. it is extraordinary that I can see photographs of them beside a supposed musician wearing a cowboy hat and I complain about them instead. I assume the headline has been truncated and he doesn’t simply have the stage name “Chris,” but I am not angry enough at him to look it up.

I can appreciate that Mr. Legend can play a pianoforte instrument. I do not know if he does that especially well but there is definitely POTENTIAL there that Ed’s brand of bland unaccompanied acoustic guitar sappy moaning lacks. My Sheeran references happen to be several years old since it was precisely encountering songs like his that extra-emphasized the need for me to carry earphones in my personal satchel at all times. even if I do not take the satchel out of the house for a few days and need the ear phones for other tasks, I always store them in the bag because when I DO go to a place where I am at risk of hearing those songs, I WILL bring the bag, and if the ear phones fail to be in it I will quite lose my mind when struck by unblockable audio awfulness in public. It happened this summer with the beyonk “halo” song and that was hopefully enough to scare me straight for another few years. That and Sheeran’s too cohOOold outside crumbling like pASTEries are absolutely the worst songs I have ever heard that I remember right this moment. But Sheeran is a man with white celtic lineage similar to my own so there is no cultural or social “privilege” anyone can accuse me of having benefat from that he didn’t also so I feel more confident in declaring that he is absolutely horrible and without merit. Also Beyonce can dance or could at one point in her career. I don’t think I’ve seen a picture of Sheeran verifiably standing up.


look at that smirk. why stop with one cut?


hey guys we’re all unblemished rich privileged chums who get paid to be lazy together and call ourselves beautiful. I hope everyone involved with this dies immediately. But I know they didn’t because I saved this picture in January 2021 and I know at least Sheeran is still alive since the screenrant article that mentioned him was from more recently. It also didn’t mention him being permanently scarred by a sword attack so I assume that didn’t amount to anything either.
in retrospect I think he had no involvement with this but the convention of listing as many singers who need their faces looked as possible in the title confounded me initially. I only see two in the picture so the other two in the title are there for name-drop purposes foremost. And also perhaps so you don’t assume it is the beautiful people marilyn manson song, even though I would be more likely to listen to it if I thought it was the case that these ai-generated-looking forklogans were covering that raspy absurdity than whatever low energy misery Ed approved of, assuming “Khalid” didn’t bring anything new to that table, and really Sheeran has no financial incentive to allow that and I have no auditory incentive to consider that he might have. It might haven taken less time to check the song than to explain why I did not, but I would then be at risk of remembering it which I prefer to reserve the right not to. Good night!


I presume accidentally getting cut by nighto is even more embarrassing.



October 25, 2023
This is a young adult comedy, peppered with drama, and doused in squid ink.



gosh what a monster


and I can hardly comprehend what an anti-semite my nine year old niece must be to own TWO of these.

for context I have never bought into the media cult around Thunberg, but rallying people against greed and corruption is ultimately doing something good. So when someone else looks at that work, ignores the actual message and evidence and seeks only what nits can be picked from it in order to dismiss it, I am disinclined to give their remarks much weight. Ha HA! An OCTOPUS which doesn’t resemble this in the slightest was used to discredit jews a long time ago! Therefore climate change is a hoax and one government which has Jews in it deserves to claim whatever territory it wants any way that it wants for all time. And if that comes from the same person who always says after a mass shooting is “too soon” to talk about gun control,

You can say that we need to consider that Hamas struck first, cruelly, without regard for the most basic human decency, but that doesn’t justify indiscriminately eradicating the population kept in the same scrap of land as Hamas as revenge. And this isn’t the first time for this unbalanced revenge. This conflict did not START two weeks ago. This is the same Gaza whose notorious stripping constantly dominated news I didn’t pay attention to growing up. No, the people who started it are all dead and we ought to be able to do better than to continue it forever, cheering for whichever “side” we were born into to “win,” like it’s championship figure skating or badminton.

when he says “both countries,” he means Israel and the US. He and the Israel government doesn’t consider Palestine to be a country and will do and say nothing in support of it becoming one, because that would require both admitting any level of fault in its policies and also ceding territory it claimed unjustifiably, which “both countries” here never do.

A criticism I see of Israel criticizers is that they don’t condemn Hamas. My initial thinking was, it isn’t necessary to condemn hamas, it was widely condemned immediately. The first and easiest reaction is to condemn hamas. But I also know there are people out there, too many in my own family, who believe in “the deep state” and will gladly tell you the evils of “the Rothschilds” and all that involves. So just to be clear, I now today condemn hamas, I curse hamas, I sneer at hamas. You can’t cure systemic oppression by beheading and raping people who have nothing to with it any more than you can cure a headache by punching someone who doesn’t appear to have a headache over your frustration at being unjustly denied ibuprofen.
Hamas has been funded by crypto currency since 2019. That alone is reason enough to shut it down.


this continuing text goes around in circles. I could cut it off here but I want to know it is SOMEWHERE even if it is repetitive. I put something roughly equivalent into facebook but evidently that was inadequate to getting me over it. There were no reactions whatsoever to it, even critical ones, which made me suspect the facebook machine simply hid my remarks since I mentioned a divisive topic but without being particularly inflammatory despite the large quantity of words used, so eventually it all came out of me again.

An irony with the gripe against Thunberg is that by insisting that someone who criticizes Israel must be attacking jews in general, it is you who makes the association, the same way someone who attacks jews in the US might accuse them of being agents for Israel just by the basis of their religion. That is absurd, and that would happen even without the stupid cephalopod there.
It needs to be possible to consider one separately from the other. Just as it is necessarily to consider people in Israel, many of whom are not Jews at all, separate from the government of that country, whose actions are not approved of by a staggering amount of those people. Not being able to differentiate these groups, or not caring to, is a big part of how these stupid conflicts get so intractable. so many ignorant belligerents live for nothing more than symbolic revenge against what they consider to be representatives of what has actually wronged them. The bosses who order soldiers into war are not harmed by nasty guerrilla attacks on civilians perceived to be symbolic of the bosses, and instead the bosses gain more leverage for their own bigger symbolic re-revenge.

Personally, I think the entire area should be vacated. That will never happen. Muslims, Christians and Jews all consider that “the holy land” and their least rational behaviors can always be traced back to ludicrous scriptural notions. A harmonious world will never be achieved when men with guns think god or gods told them they are right. And it’s usually men because god is usually also telling them to dominate and punish women much as they do heathen men. The Chinese communists ostensibly eschew religion but the government acts in a way that is consistent with one directed by religion.

The US had its own big terrorist attack in 2001 that you might have heard of, and also like Israel ignored reports it received that such an attack was coming. In fact the US just spent two decades trying to get revenge for that, and that made everything worse (though deliberately confounding the facts so George W Bush could cram in his own bonus revenge against Saddam Hussein did not help), and now the US is supporting another country trying to do the same, but with more volatile potential consequences. Stupid stupid stupid.
As much as idiots who voted for him may have WISHED for it, Bush was never going to and lacked the authority to blast Iraq off the map, even while that war killed hundreds of thousands of civilians. The Benji Netanyahu gang on the other appendage have a much smaller target entirely within their country’s border and are entirely capable of killing everybody in Gaza and have tried to sell that as an admirable outcome. That’s not good! Even if it ended there it wouldn’t be good but it won’t possibly end there. These wars cannot be “won.” And if they inexplicably destroy just Hamas it won’t end there either since they’ve already ensured the next generation of revenge-seekers whose existence they will use as justification for more oppression. It’s too late to stop this one. But it might not be too late to prevent the next one.
A sickeningly common right wing mantra after mass shootings is that it is “too soon” to talk about gun control. But they were disingenuous and meant to never talk about gun control and just hoped for another topic to come up, and sure enough we never talked about gun control. Now we have mass shootings every week now, meaning it is perpetually “too soon” after one. But it is never too soon for them to talk about gun USAGE.

I am glad to see more people unafraid to stand up to that thinking but I worry it might be too late.
Israel’s treatment of its own citizens, notably women, is superior to many of the countries in that region, and plenty outside of that region. I don’t see stories about Izzy trying to kidnap travelers at airports and as far as I know it is not punishable by death to renounce the state religion. But that is stuff NO country should be doing, so being better than them is not enough.

Hamas is a terrorist organization, and we condemn it. So regarding it as we do, we ought to hold ourselves to a higher standard than them, not merely exterminate them whichever way its fastest and say it’s done. Nothing is ever “done” just because a loud person declares it is.

This website entry probably isn’t even done, but I am trying to be quiet about it.



July 4, 2023
Evil cowboys dressed in black, carrying neon whips appear before Tyler, threatening her; a cowboy hero dressed in white, brandishing a revolver, appears on horseback and the evil cowboys flee on horseback, with the hero in pursuit.


to follow on the topic of southern us commercialism = southern us culture, in Atlanta Georgia immediately adjacent to the ostensibly educational Georgia Aquarium is the “World of Coca Cola,” whose singular goal is to advertise a non-health-contributing beverage at you, one that is sold at literally every vendor in the city, if not the state, and you need to PAY to get in!

I did not go there, but since I went to the aquarium I was near enough to it to see that the price of admission does not get you any complementary product to consume either.

and also a rather incongruous mix of attractions. I wonder if this is a legally mandated community service sort of thing since the drink was invented by John Pemberton, a confederate colonel/snake oil merchant/eye surgeon who owned slaves.


It makes me wonder if the Coca Cola company ever experimented with putting cans of coke into archive footage of revdr Martin Luther Kingjr and Rosa Parks like they did with Fred Astaire and Groucho Marx.

ALSO my angle isn’t: don’t drink coke, it was invented by a slave owner (though “don’t drink coke, it’s liquid candy” is valid); every company that old was started by a slave owner. If pepsi was a decade or so older it would also have been. Slavery is woven into the textile of american history, if not white history as a whole, and human history as a wholer, to paraphrase the hokey sort of person who wants to pretend slavery didn’t happen or benefit them. BUT I can imagine the contemporary owners of the company considering that an image-related problem for them and wanting to make sure they have a defense prepared that they can point at when the topic comes up.

But EARLIER in June I needed to visit a hard wares store. While operating an automobile even. Rather a change from the earlier days of this website. My life has changed but my opinions haven’t. My cousins once insisted that when I was older I would appreciate the Beatles and Bob Dylan also. I don’t, I merely encounter more songs that are worse than theirs. While momentarily stopped at a traffic intersection near the store, I overheard bits of a hokey country-sounding song playing from a neighboring motorist’s vehicle. I thought that was odd, and so was quite surprised when I arrived at the store and the SAME song was playing from the local sound system. The song’s lyrics concerned how “we all have a hill billy bone down deep inside,” essentially trying to say we are all dumb southerners who enjoy songs like this ultimately. Somehow it was released in 2009 and I was never prior aware of its existence. My gripe, though, is it isn’t a hillbilly song. there is no fiddle, no banjo, no jug or washboard. It has electric guitars and studio production. No hillbilly music is getting played on a radio station in Madison Connecticut, if anywhere.


The singers, apparently there are two, aren’t hillbillies either. They are red necks. Hillbillies do stuff for a reason or out of necessity, rednecks just affect the imagery they see from celebrities and/or politicians. If you observe a hillbilly wearing a cowboy hat, chances are that’s just the only kind of hat available, or maybe you’ve even witnessed an actual cowboy. Rednecks vote for Trump, hillbillies don’t trust city folk, if they’re even registered to vote, if they even know an election is happening. Dumb rednecks are dumb by choice because somehow or another that is a status symbol, dumb hillbillies are dumb because their schools are under-funded, if they even have schools. Rednecks collect guns and pose with them on instagram, Hillbillies know that you know they have guns and don’t need to advertise it, and as long as you stay off their land it won’t become an issue. Assuming they still have land and corporations supported by rednecks haven’t cheated them out of it. Rednecks swear they aren’t racist, especially the racist ones. Hillbillies, again, don’t care who thinks they are racist. Rednecks hate queers. Hillbillies think rednecks are queers.

In fact, it isn’t even a redneck song. it sounds more like Black Cat by Janet Jackson in 1990 than anything country or Appalachian. Supposedly Black Cat is “Jackson’s first solo writing credit.” Do you know who wrote the Hillybilly boney song? Two totally different people that aren’t the ones singing it.


it’s about the phoniest garbage I have heard of since a tv commercial advertising “honky tonk badonkadonk,” which I looked up for this post today and BOTH songs are sung by Trace Adkins, who has never had a solo writing credit. Though this apparently was written by a different group of boneheads who sell songs to other boneheads than the song about bones.

pardon me, “bro-heads.” Thankfully I didn’t know about this terminology i 2005, else I might have requested my immediate execution rather than a pardon. The only group phonier and jerkier and more addicted to following orders from unaccountable imbeciles than rednecks are bros.

I don’t get this at all. You don’t want black people in your neighborhoods, your public offices or your precious advertising but you will appropriate vernacular like “badunkadunk” from their dumbest recording artists. Is that just to make it so lame that they don’t want it either? Black rappers stopped saying “bling” so fast that I can’t tell if the scheme worked or if the originators realized it was lame before that happened.


and the “previous single” is called Arlington. Possibly the most deliberately depressing place in the united states, Arlington National Cemetery, and again written by other people, even though the album is titled “songs about me.” Trace Atkins is not buried in Arlington Nat’l Cemetery, and he never will be unless he gets crushed by a meteorite whose path sent it through the fence while he was being chaffeured past the place. Though as I mentioned in a title tag above this I was surprised to learn that Adkins has in fact been fired upon by an enemy combatant and hit, but the aggressor was his second of four wives.
He only has a song that mentions it because redneck is a quasi-relgious identity, where you subjugate women and drink international conglomerate brand beer (provided it isn’t endorsed by anyone gay or trans) and crow about how “rebellious” you are then suddenly are serious and solemn worshiping [the concept of] The Troops on designated federal holidays while picking fights with anyone who isn’t. The only reason we still HAVE troops in 2023 is because bullies and idiots who obey bullies won’t stop picking fights over really stupid issues.
What a phony pandering sack of empty nonsense this goobert is.

he has had seventeen studio albums full of songs about the same three topics, all written by other people, and he wants me to believe he wrote a book? About how free-thinking he is? He’s literally named after copying someone else’s work. I CHECKED, he is credited as a co-writer on ten songs, total, in twenty five years, which admittedly is more than I was expecting, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he did more than make a suggestion, and only the first was released as a single. Since it wasn’t a hit single I guess his writing privileges were revoked. Which is more about the machinations of The Music Industry as a whole than redneckery specifically, but as noted that is inextricable from corporate directives. Nobody is less rebellious than people who need you to know they are rebels.
Even compared to his hill billy co-boning co-singer Blake Shelton Adkins is depressing. Shelton has 16 co-writing credits in 12 albums and even a single solo credit in twenty zero years, and has actually been photographed not wearing a cowboy hat. Unfortunately now I know hard trivia about both of them and may even be able to discern them from each other.

but there are always worse things to know.



June 26, 2023
I am sorry, yes I am, I do not talk to strangers ma’am. You’re part of this giant plot, Please don’t tell me that you’re not


great food if your oxen can ford the river
Maybe I am too accustomed to the stereotyped labeling of the northeast united states and national chains but I can’t help wondering if this Mexican restaurant primarily serves corn meal biscuits and any rabbits you caught en route. Stranger still, it is in Helen, a German-themed tourist town, in north Georgia.
I was there for four days last week. I took thousands of pictures. Some of them weren’t even blurry, but I am too tired to finish this sentence. I also spent two days in Atlanta, the Coca Cola capital of the world, also in Georgia. For once I was in an area where I could reliably trust no place would only have pepsi when I wanted coke, but I just drank water the whole time, and occasionally iced tea.

They don’t have “iced tea” in Georgia either, preferring unpalatable “sweet tea” but that is great once I squeeze four lemon slices into it. And here is a picture of that, apparently. You can tell I was out of my home since the broken android brand mobile device I usually employ in this era is visible here so I must have been using the bigger mechanical digital camera that I bring on long trips, because it takes pictures of the wider variety of supermarkets and public restrooms I visit away from my home much faster and blurrier than any touch-screen device. A drink that isn’t good, at all, “starry.”

I never heard of it before I got to the Laguardia airport; I researched the matter and learned that Sierra Mist sodee pop was discontinued at some point. Then replaced with “mist twist,” then returned, then discontinued again and replaced with this.
Unless it was singularly responsible for the debilitating bladder ache I felt for the next hour before I was free to tend to that, I would say that Starry “hits” exactly the same as every other bland “lemon-lime” drink since 7-up changed its recipe to taste like Sprite in 1998. And even that I didn’t think about until this napkip was already crumpled, on its way out and separated from the actual product it accompanied, hence this being one of the blurry shots I mentioned.
I asked for starry because the drink was “free” and despite flying out of Atlanta and offering coca cola’s horrid Minute Maid “”juice”” brand, the flight only stocked Pepsi-brand non-juices, I wanted to ingest some calories on the flight, but was morally opposed to purchasing food at airport prices.

I had reluctantly reacquainted myself with Minute Maid on the previous week’s incoming flight and imagined I was set for life on that. So what the heck I thought, I will try this thing that it wants me so badly to try. And indeed it was badly.

I would like a proper national brand of this stuff.
That is not Mt. Dew; apart from the garish dye they are fairly dissimilar. For sodas, I mean.
Even the local restaurants that have Foxon Park on tap don’t offer the green flavor. Instead they have “Gassosa,” which tastes like Sprite.

It is frustrating that a company which has a superior citrus drink more heavily emphasizes the one that tastes like a less-good but better-known citrus drink. But that is how capitalism works. Most effort is put into remaking, rebooting, and ripping off stuff that already exists and aren’t great but are proven to generate revenue. But even with that in mind I don’t know why pepsi makes a big fuss over releasing a new soda that is indistinguishable from its old soda.

It’s essentially what McDonalds does with the mcrib sandwiches, getting press every other week when “it’s back” even though nobody seems to notice or care when it leaves. the pepsi company has to design and manufacture new logos and labels (and inadequately sized promotional napkins), and distribute them to every business that was selling sierra mist whenever it does this, if those places even go to the trouble of changing the drink machine labels, nevermind the menus, which makes building name recognition for the rebranded product complicated, since if somebody orders sierra mist off last month’s menu and gets a cup of Starry instead they probably won’t even notice. Unless the server says “sorry, we have starry” and then the buyer has to wonder what starry is and ponder whether to try it. Heapwhile mcdonalds just has to dust off the rip-shaped mold that the meat paste and pork syrup get sprayed into and pull the “mcrib is back!” sign out from under the counter.

Incidootily it is peculiar to me what a hullabaloo mcdonalds made about ‘grimace’s birthday’ last week when the character hasn’t been used in a quarter century and is best known now for appearing in a 1980s ad with Trump. All the mcdonalds characters got revoked because they were designed to represent mcdonalds food (including grimace, though not in my lifetime), which the company needed to be able to insist it was not targeting at children. They could show Ronald McDonald doing “healthy” things like playing basketball or doing his taxes or whatever, since he is at his core just a human who dresses funny. But you can’t rehabilitate the Hamburglar; he exists only to steal hamburgers and Mcdonalds isn’t allowed to put hamburgers into its marketing aimed at kids anymore, even though hamburgers is what it sells. And mcdonalds still has special “meals” specifically FOR kids, which have the same food in them, packed into boxes covered with imagery of OTHER company’s characters in promotion of material that will rot kids’ brains just as much as the food will rot their other organs. Everybody with money is lying, and the regulators all know it, but they don’t have enough funding or resources themselves to care about it. Meatwhile the politicians running on the platform of ostensibly protecting “our kids” get financed by companies like McDonalds and its happy meal cobranders, and want nothing more than to cut funding for regulation further, then seal the deal by appointing their like-minded buddies to all the chief positions. ha, ha haaaaaa

i SUPPOSE pepsi might be planning some longer term scheme, with a massive “Sierra Mist is BACK!” campaign planned for if its pseudonym doesn’t catch on, like when Coca Cola reintroduced “Coke Classic!” after New! Coke flopped in 1985 (which I am not old enough to remember but it was a popular joke topic for years). HOWEVER that only worked because Coca Cola was already the market leader and was just spooked by pepsi’s cola supposedly winning “blind taste test”s, in addition to fears that an alternative Coke would steal market share points from the main coke and might let pepsi claim to be the number one cola just because it didn’t have a second pepsi, unless new coke BECAME the main coke. The fragile egos of billionaires afraid of imaginary numbers were the only factor*. Whereas Sierra Mist was hardly bought by anyone at the time of its most recent supposed removal.
*AND the reason for the flop was the fragile cultural identifies of rednecks who care about marketing too much and mistake brand preference for cultural identity + bullying from complacent attention seeking doofuses who don’t have real problems. They have a lot in common with those now protesting woke. Woke is the new New Coke. I liked old 7-up better than new 7-up or the other drinks it changed itself to be as less-good-as but it truly is not of great importance to me.


anyway I have to go clean out the car since it looks like a hurricane tore off the roof and flooded it while I was away.



October 19, 2022
The Ultima Weapon is Cloud’s ultimate weapon received after defeating the Ultimate Weapon.

10-28-2022 updating this website may not be feasible again before novemeber. do you care? somebody told me you did.

/////////////////////////////////


realizing that a dirk is essentially a dork has profoundly changed my world view.

my first experience with this was in the Batman Nintendo ES game. somebody with access to the instruction manual proclaimed the disk-like weapon that splits into 3 a “dirk.” that really isn’t what a dirk is but sure enough the manual really does call it that. which means batman is pretty much throwing dorks at his foes. imagine how close he must have come to using Burt Ward as a weapon back in the 1960s.

a few years later while playing final fantasy threex my elder brother had the hero Relm use the “sketch” attack against Hidon and totally screwed up the game, resulting in multiplicity of rare items like gem box and illumina, but more importantly HUNDREDS of dirks. which as we know MIGHT AS WELL be hundreds of dorks. think of the damage you could inflict with THAT much unrepentent corniness on your side.

players these days apparently gripe about the heroes Cyan, Gau and Umaro, but at least they have honor enough to REFUSE to use a dirk.


Sabin also doesn’t use dirks either but he also spend s a lot of time rushing bums and in most cases I consider that disreputable.

Although in this specific instance Sabin engages a foe who used to be a regularish person who was SO greedy that he transformed into a lizard, that is not always the case.



(I don’t know what chief programmer Kan Naito is talking about here, I just think the way he says the title at the start is funny)

The sega genesis game Landostoka contains, as a clue, the poemoid

What happens when dorks get dangerous?

Correct, skeletons.
I mean that “skeletons” is the correct answer, not that skeletons themselves make wise decisions. You solve the puzzle by ignoring all the skeletons except the one that isn’t white, then beating it up. In skeleton lore, having a dumb color makes you a dork, which is a sin against God requiring your immediate termination. Skeletons have also historically been racist. that is just history. In fact all these skeletons reveal themselves as dorks just by the way they JUMP without extra animation frames to go up stairs, but since that doesn’t come across in a screen shot I cannot for the moment effectively criticize them for that.


initially I misremembered the skeletons here as being knights possibly due to this corny line being permanently enshrined in my consciousness

and consequently referred to knight lore rather than skeleton lore.


This is important because my next point referred to the Ultimate Play The Game game “Knight Lore,” which involves no knightly deeds or insults whatsoever, only slowwwwly traversing a castle named “knightlore” which is itself pretty dorky, without even the assistance of any dirks. instead your fragile traverser becomes a werewolf who seems to be no less fragile but does waste an extra 3-6 seconds of his life and yours changing to and back after the approximate amount of time it takes to walk across 5 room. All times are relative because any moving objects apart from the protagonist in a room slows it down considerably.
this game achieved massive critical acclaim. From dorks.

I cannot confirm a rumor that the werewolf’s appearance and ill-acclimation to video games inspired Paul “TX Critter” Fusco to create ALF, I can merely start that rumor right now.

complete freedom to pick up objects and drop objects, unless touching them destroys you


COINCIDENTALLY, there is another nearly identical game called Batman that involves Batman doing the exact same thing, just in a cave. Batman no longer needs to use dorks as weapons; verily, he can’t use weapons at all and is victimized by everything, for he has become the dork.


Don’t read that. The story is that a bunch of characters you won’t see are somewhere else because batman can’t keep track of his stuff and apparently is so clever that he placed fatal duplicates of his stuff as traps for, apparently, himself, in his own cave


they DARE to make THIS the box art for such a game.

People associate disappointing licensed games with the nes, and it seems like a miracle that Batman got a good one, dorks notwithstanding, but he actually beat the simpsons and ninja turtles to point-missing nonsense by several years

1980s computer software companies were just cranking this trash out. Since Ultimate Play The Game pioneered this isometric interface amidst a crown of minimalist black-void background side-view games people were in awe of it even though the computers of that period were too wimpy to do anything interesting with it, and apart from that Ultimate Play The Game’s developers were more about abusing players than entertaining them. This was made plain when with access to more powerful Nintendo hardware and calling themselves Rare Ltd, a self-labeling improvement, I admit, rather than making a GOOD isometric adventure game they made Roger Rabbit, Wrestlemania and Battletoads instead. Also Snake Rattle n Roll which actually is isometric but I don’t known enough to hate that enough to complain about it. However they licensed Knight Lore to Jaleco who made an even worse version of the game than they did.


I can’t remember what I was talking about. Stay away from video games. They will ruin your life even if you don’t have time to play them anymore.



March 30, 2022
You’ve found something strange! But a black rock is inside!


nothing but destruction in the news these days. the numbers may not lie but i wish they would be more discreet.


I’ve heard of this one, it’s called using a toilet.


Hours worth of vague twit-feed allusions to it some days ago eventually gave me enough information to realize Christopher Rock got smacked and yelled at on stage during a recent award ceremony I was otherwise glad to not be watching, and after looking up the story and going to bed, the question my mind kept coming back to was “when did he shave off his beard?”

the joke that prompted the response was over “the line” but attacking the man for the joke was overer the line, but I can’t stand any of those people anyway so why does it matter? They’re already millionaires and they get paid to be there getting filmed while getting praised by each other for how strong and beautiful and talented they are and giving awards to themselves, it’s disgusting. The whole building should be slapped and yelled at, and that wouldn’t be nearly enough.
I was watching episodes of the hbo series “Succession” that night. I can only enjoy the most entitled hollow misanthropes on earth when I know they aren’t real people.
Obviously they are PORTRAYED by real people, but evidently the in-character, on-set, following a more plot-driven script layers of separation are enough for my personal disbelief suspension.

I was even able to get past the involvement of Adam McKay, whom I had a gripe with due to for some reason having him confused with T. Sean Shannon over an especially lame sketch called “Harold” that the latter was written-and-directed-by credited for on Saturday Night Live during a period when I found it particularly gripeworthy but not yet enough to conclude watching it, and both personages must have been on the writing staff. Consequently the gripe isn’t necessarily relevant, but it is meaningful that I was able to overcome the gripe before realizing it was irrelevant. I am grateful whenever that is possible! It is entirely feasible McKay was solely responsible for other work that I hated or would have hated as much or more than Harold, but he didn’t write any scripts for Succession and only directed a single episode, AND I haven’t consciously been aware of anything else that was directed by him while watching and hating.

It is bizarre that I have been to this park, Great Escape in Queensbury NY, but don’t have a single picture from an angle close to one used on “Succession.” I remember those silly colored houses because my niece was more interested in pretending in those than going on rides.



I also didn’t realize this shot was meant to show common folk being barred from entering while the company owners’ families had a birthday party because this is NOT ACTUALLY THE ENTRANCE to the park.

This is “timbertown;” the show didn’t bother to change the sign logo!

This is noteworthy because because because 1149pm now and this turns into a different topic and then another topic and I can’t finish the matter right now, and so I either post the part I did finish or probably never post any of it, so it probably isn’t really all that noteworthy, and I have done so anyhow because I am too old to change my habits, only manage them and their consequences better.



March 9, 2022
ah well, thanks Cheatcodechamp and you too Orangeleopard1819 i’ll be more careful with the gift of lycanthropy

my life is screwy lately. not aggressive neighbor nation shooting bombs at my soviet-era concrete housing brick then telling me I am free to leave if I don’t like it but shooting at me as I try to leave screwy, but enough to make me confused. I didn’t get to my computer until 7pm yesterday, which through the simultaneous unannounced updating of the firefox internet perusing device and thunderbird email sorting mechanism plus a bizarre disk hiccup left me unable to access email nor be permitted to recreate the account through which I accessed it,


and then was greeted with this once the website browser finally decided it was ready to load pages.


There is a cartoon character that I cropped out of the image. it will appear in here later and I don’t want to look at it, much less in two places.

This is such an embarrassing attempt to pander to the adult child with money demographic that is hard enough coexist with when there isn’t media aping it. Or SHOULD I say “panda-ing” to and “foxing” it no.

Products do not have emotions and brands do not live “w/” anxiety. They do not “live” at all and they do not have feelings. Meanwhile anxiety has always existed, and just because people didn’t always personally introduce themselves with “um hi um gee I uhhh have anxiety I guess? ha ha blush norly sorry not sorry omg” doesn’t mean it’s new in people or in media.

Likewise Disney did not in 2022 invent Asians.I welcome non-Anglo heroes, but not every time there is one having that be incessantly pointed out like Look how BLACK this princess who turns into a frog is! and how ASIAN this quirky nerd who turns into an A.fulgens is! And how LATIN this grimacing also nerd’s whole magic house family is! And hey isn’t this huge-mouthed perpetually barefoot kid who turns into a fish just SUPER Mediterranean?

If you want to normalize multi-cultural identities in film you have to let them be normal, and let their presences speak for themselves.

yes I know barefoot kid is officially a fish person who turns into a human but in the end it doesn’t make much difference. these characters all relate to the world and other people the same way and aspire to the same things as all the white and casually non-white characters from American cartoons before them who may or may not spontaneously become animals if they aren’t already. And consequently I don’t relate to any of them, which allows me to see that each new iteration giving press-jobs to themselves over how different they are as gratingly disingenuous. AND ALSO, as indicated by the word being circled in red earlier, their RELATEability is their greatest asset. We don’t make movies for people who can’t relate to our characters because people buy merchandise of relatable characters, not good stories.

I do not know if the latest plot’s transformation is triggered by deliberately improbable circumstances like in Ranma or emotions like The Hulk or violent trauma like in The Pagemaster, and I don’t want to know, and am glad that I have not been made to know against my will by anyone in my company so far. But that is only because my niece for the time being is more interested in watching shorter-form braindead videos on her personal tablet than feature films on the big television box that I witness more easily. I increasingly have blocked disney-themed keywords on twitter-sorts of sites as it saturates more and more discourse space it isn’t entitled to, and maybe firefox picked up on that, both wanting to get disney bucks and prevent anyone from being unaware of it.



irefox isn’t bothering to lie about not advertising (apart from boasting about how “independent” it is), i suppose, with no attempt to explain how this trash is justified, unlike back in november when it promoted its VPN at me and presumably other users, and accompanied that with a message about how it doesn’t promote products. it did not attempt to convince me that promoting a disney movie is not promotion, but that could also be due to the general hubris concept that EVERYBODY likes Disneyandpixare so NOBODY WOULDN’T want to see an ad for it!

because LOOK at how GOSH DARN ADORABLE it is! except it isn’t even that. its face is tiny but its head is huge, its body is chubby and I literally can’t tell if this is the front or the back since it is so amorphous.

it looks like dom deluise’s character from the Fievel movies, except without discernible feet at the ends of its limbs because pixar artists are more inclined to fetishize human feet. The only thing I like about the newer character is that it doesn’t look like zootopia, and that is really more of a hate less sort of assessment.

when I was sixish years old a friend of my father gave my family a bunch of bootleg movies on vhs, including An American tale, but it didn’t have the opening credits and I couldn’t read anyway so for years I had no idea it was called that, and I still prefer not to call it that since the word “tale” always bothered me, even when not being punished into “tail” whenever there is an animal-related concept involved. Every episode of “are you afraid of the dark?” was “the tale of…” something or other. Even as a child unconcerned with what anyone else thought about anything the word and its pretentious air irked me.


the only way this film would defy expectations would be if it wasn’t annoying, and it already is. Defying stereotypes by announcing you are doing that is already a stereotype. Ever since princess Jasmin did a pole vault and then I had to look at how SURPRISED Aladdin was and hear the dumbest kids in the room who already saw the movie 50 times say “I’m a fast learner” in synchronization, Disney has been pushing this “look at our TOUGH and competent ladies!” narrative without simply letting them BE tough or competent, and still selling merchandise emphasizing their prettiness foremost. And much like with the racial composition of the characters, if you simply let that BE normal you won’t rile up the rightwing bro brigade to try and ruin the product based on how “woke” they perceive it to be. But I think that is also deliberate, to some degree, like with the shoddy ghostbusters movie some years back, or Black Panther or Captain Marvel. It’s GREAT publicity if you can prove a bunch of morons are trying to pre-emptively censor your product, and also allows you to dismiss any legitimate criticism as coming from that moron bunch. I am not a moron bunch! I am but one moron. Evidently. I think I had mild covid in january and apparently it is related to “grey matter reduction” so I am stupid now, but still not enough to be fooled by disney.

ALso don’t ask me what the gwok a vpn is because I am still not sure despite evidently first trying to find out in 2015. I couldn’t even figure out what the letters stood for. Virtual Private Network but that is no longer relevant to my situation. Using one is supposed to protect you from being caught if you pirate stuff or be tracked by marketers trying to charge you extra money for what you acquire more legitimately, but then you have to pay to get the vpn, and everybody selling one is vague and unclear about every step of it, often using mismatched figures and paper towel math to explain their prices and or requiring longterm subscription agreements, and it comes across like scam marketing in itself. ESPECIALLY when the company selling the vpn is also getting money from the company controlling most of the media and marketing, including subscription services. Imagine you use the firefox vpn to download the “turning red” film –i won’t, hence this scenarior being imaginary– the dollars probably go to the same place, and then they’ll also try to fine you $5000 for piracy in the event the vpn isn’t the magnificent sorcery it purports itself to be.

After I started writing today’s page, firefox stopped working entirely, with this error among others, like it thinks I’m going to apologize and say “wait the image wasn’t THAT bad, come back, please?” I expect it already has its own angry post about how it blocked another hater and it doesn’t even care about all the haters it keeps mentioning. It reminds me that I started using firefox years ago after netscape was purchased by the america online company, and it become bloated and unusable. Since all software is bloated now and Disney for the moment does not desire to own firefox, which is evident through disney not already owning firefox, it settled for simply becoming unusable.
I am for the moment using a very similar browser called Libre Wolf that fulfills the basic criteria of displaying webpages and having a stupid animal name. If it goes well then I will absolutely not say so.


thanksh narc. I’m embracing my true self by not trusting opinions from strangers with memes and declining to watch it while I yet have the freedom not to.

/////////////////////////

addendoy for march 13:
entirely unsought bits of information on twitter from people who say things like “not gonna lie” and “bro” indicate that menstruation is what causes the gimmick transformation this time, hence the “red” in the title, and isn’t it PROGRESSIVE that d-d-d-DIZNEE would DARE to do this? Yeh whatever similarly unrequested data indicates that disney declined to release a Ghibli movie from 1991 that it had rights to over the film having menstruation references in it. Because if Disney doesn’t do something first it doesn’t count. Meanwhile the obnoxious firing squad of bullet points firefox showed me did not include “bleeds from vulvic orifice” and I have to see


this grating smugster stupidimposed on my roku front page, trying to get kids to watch it, with no indication that sort of topic is going to come up, and if anyone in my family is going to have a problem with that it would be my mother foremost, and not “men” as twitter’s insufferablest disney shills prefer to gripe. Whatever I am, that is content to dislike this at any time of the month. I don’t consider the mere allusion to blood as unpleasant as having to hear and often “see” flatulence in every cartoon since Ren & Stimpy 30 years ago but I’m not going to praise big D for doing it either as all signs indicate the production is utterly typical apart from that.



December 5, 2021
In one scene, the puppies enter a snow cave, seeking advice from a wise old husky. The cave was made of Styrofoam.

because this is what i have this week


I had this on an audio cassette tape a life ago, and had occasion to think of it earlier while dispensing decorative shiny objects about the immediate premises. I have attempted to look it up in the past and had no success, but THIS time found that this very October somebody uploaded them to the you tube, on an account that has existed since 2007 with apparently no other content.

as if to say, I’m not going down for the cartoon dog christmas album but I believe the time has come for the world to know about it.


oddly enough his other account only has TWO videos, one of which is just an Ugly Luigi meme, even though as far as I know more lawsuits have been threatened over nintendo junk than the ding danged pound puppies, but one way or another if one gets taken out the other will survive and have a chance to flee to safety.
the songs also have comments disabled, to ensure nobody starts snooping around asking questions.

questions like: “why did you feel it was necessary to kid-designate and thus comment-block this 36-year old christmas album that has probably more tracks on it than people who have heard of it who still remember it who would bother to go looking for it who are most of a certainty older than it?” or “why did you spell rudolph like that?”
or more to the point

“what happen?”

expanding the description reveals more of Volcano’s concern that he has put himself at risk with this caged canid caroling. He even put the dumb ™ in the text, twice, for fleep’s beeps. I want to send a message to tell him he missed a few. but I can’t.

I don’t want to hear this album again. But I feel like I must. It is my earliest memory of some of the songs on it, named “beginning to look a lot like christmas” and “my favorite things,” although it still doesn’t strike me as much of a christmas song. But these were early enough memories that I don’t remember watching the cartoon that I presumably had been a fan of. I ordinarily avoid the word “fan;” I watched the smurfs as a child just because it was on but I have no memory of ever liking them. I don’t remember LIKING pound puppies either but I definitely had their dumb christmas album and one of the dolls so i must have expressed fondness for the product line.

In particular “the night before christmas” is presented as a song and the dumb tune always stuck with me even though I have not heard it elsewhere, and “We wish you a merry christmas” has disco instrumentation in it that it ordinarily lacks. also lots of howling.

I most definitely don’t want anyone else to hear me hearing this. But I also don’t want to hear it in absolute clarity with headphones. Maybe I can use some “AM radio with static” audio filter to take the edge off.

I also recall that even as a small child I was put off by the dorky dialog accompanying the rudolph section. I have absolutely no recollection of the title track Jingle Bells, and only a few minutes ago determined that was the NAME of the album. In my lifelong naivete I imagined it was simply called “The Pound Puppies Christmas Album” rather than “Pound Puppies Jingle Bells” which sounds more like a euphemism for an outmoded neutering technique.

……

alright, I listened to it. Pretty dumb, but not the most embarrassing thing I have ever heard as an adultish sized human. None of the songs t cause me psychological distress like the “in summer” and “fixer upper” songs from frozen do, although perhaps they would were i forced to listen against my will, on multiple occasions, and knowing the production was almost universally acclaimed. I do in fact recognize the piano intro to Jingle Bells, which I mentally had swapped with a version I heard at a “christmas concert” in middle school. It includes the line “bells and telephones ring,” WHICH may at last explain why “bells on bobtails” never sounded right to me, even now. because the POUND PUPPIES LIED TO ME. it also includes a completely barked instance of the chorus, presumably inspired by the atrocious “singing dogs” novelty records from the 1950s. in fact every song has at least one barked chorus and a few altered lines in it –often referring to wanting to be adopted, because don’t forget these are POUND puppies, strays picked up off the street scheduled to be murdered if not taken out in time, as their parents before them surely already were, and rather unpleasantly too, this predating the Humane Euthanasia Act of 1990, the usual children’s entertainment fare– but I can’t always tell what the altered lines ARE, though I couldn’t always tell what they were before.


the official album title does indeed indicate that barking will be present in tiny, diagonally offset but elegant letters, which presumably won’t be noticed by most people until long after they have already heard the barking, and who consequently ought to at least appreciate the relative fanciness of the italic font.

even stranger: I eventually realized that this product predates the cartoon. The album artwork shows relatively non-anthropomorphized dogs more like the stuffed dolls than the bipedal only-ladies-have-hair-on-top-of-their-fur Hanna Barbera designs. Which means this is literally adults singing and yelping in weird voices, not as specific characters. And apart from the producer and “art director” I can’t find any credits!

only some goober trying to sell a copy signed by some of the cartoon’s voice actors, including Joanne Worley, whom wikehhhpedia tells me was not involved with the tv series that the other three were, only a made-for-tv “movie” that predated it, which the other three weren’t in, so it makes no sense for them to have sang on the same album, which makes me think none of them did. The seller’s text claiming they did also refers to songs by incorrect titles and follows it with a 98% irrelevant copy-pasted biography of Nancy Cartwright which is a majority of the text on the page.

please don’t attempt to read that, this is simply to prove that it exists! Mr. Electric Volcano was preoccupied with copyrights but Canaromorubu cares only for Cartwrights.


Do you think 85-year-old Ruth “Two Scoops a’ Truth” Buzzi remembers what every dumb cartoon for which she recorded a voice looks like? She might have thought oh yeah I did the pound puppies show a few decades ago, sure I’ll sign that without considering: But I didn’t SING as one. unless following up with …Right? Eh maybe I did. I definitely sang with muppets

Perhaps I even pounded puppies with them.

they may be beyond help.



November 28, 2021
Wolfgang Van Halen Involved In Serious Arguments With Haters On Instagram


instagraham I don’t need this garbage right now. even the “try” in there indicates this might be a futile endeavor. Give us personal information, it says, and MAYBE we’ll let you back in. To the APP. We have miles of empty space into which to type “lication” but the more we normalize jargon, slang and abbreviations as proper terminologies the less anyone using these systems will have a clue what is going on.

ah hes also i used an alternate camera to take these pictures because the screen capture function on my mobile telephone machine is broken, on account of requiring the pressing of the power and volume buttons simultaneously, and the volume buttons no longer functioning, a development without which this unnecessary comic strip would not have been necessary. it will still TAKE screenshots but only when it feels like doing so.


which is why I have a folder full of pictures of icons, text messages and people calling me. I don’t delete them because obviously I was going to talk about this happening at some point and wanted evidence.


anywhuh, a “video selfie” is not something i have ever done in my life and as long as I am able to I intend to continue that tradition. I don’t even accept the word “selfie.” I held on to vhs years into the dvd era and that was actually something useful so I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that technology is continually looking for new ways to break my experience in non-organic ways to try and force me to use something new and dumb but that it controls instead of me.


in any case I am fortunate to have allies in my struggles.

This strange Zeldalink was given as a gift to someone else but ended up following me around instead and has done so a few years. It got went pretty far but got stuck on the fourth step: “slowly tilt your head upwards,” as his neck doesn’t move and his tunic is made of hard plastic so I can’t get the camera into the right position to make it appear that Link’s head has moved. Oddly enough his hair is made of eminently malleable peanut butter.

Marketing-approved, somewhat deranged Bravemerida, the first resident I found in the next room at 1:30 in the A M when instagram issued its challenge, while also having an immobile neck, was able to finish on account of having a disproportionately large head that the camera could get under,

but unfortunately this selfie adventure took so long that video was too large to upload on my crummy internet, possibly to store on my crummy memory card.

My ever-helpful butler Alfred fortunately handled the reshoot with his usual grace and professionalism.


This had literally been in the box it was purchased in for over 20 years, waiting until the right occasion came along, which was apparently this. I have confirmed ebay people are trying to sell these for about $40 in prime boxed condition and I would say my box’s was condition is somewhat less than that. And you know some people are selling just the figure but nobody is selling just the box so I don’t know how they expect me to remedy this.

back to the point, assuming there is one:
I dislike that the ubiquity and uniformity of mobile trashnology means corporations can assume that every user has a working compact video camera positioned precisely to record their own faces. Even with people supposedly able to opt out of letting software access these cameras, the corporations can still demand that a user “opt” in to be allowed to use the software, even when it is a non-essential, possibly non-beneficial feature of the software. Any decent person could observe the user’s setting, that of having the camera blocked, and suggest and alternate method of humanity verification. Unfortunately, since there is only humanity on MY end, I get forced into doing things the robot’s way.


For now I can fool it. However, every time a test like this comes up, that trains the facial recognition machinery a bit, and eventually they will make more specific demands, like “blink your left eye” or “say the word papaya.” And most dorks will do it! The tests will not be administered simultaneously so users will never be able to collectively refuse to participate. And they probably wouldn’t anyway, since these tests also train the users to be obsequious. With all their hashtags and memes, and knowing almighty “algorithms” can cut out anyone for any deviant behavior, users are already less and less unique individuals than ever.

oh how I talk


at LEAST I have something to SAY, and am not just some entitled oxygen-stuffed dinosaur trying to tell people what to do!

also, “stress-free?” this thing has seen some trauma. admittedly I just criticized it but you know what, dinosaur, that’s part of not being extinct, rising to meet challenges. Do you think that pig doesn’t have rough days, or a rough future, or get raised in an environment so noxious and debilitating that its excrement has to be disposed of in a special “lagoon” that is literally fatal for a living being to breathe near and consequently referred to with a vague euphemism to keep people from realizing it is a death pit?
grape grimpity I am eating pork and roasted potatoes while writing this. why did you bring this up, you dumb deflated diplo dorkus?

oh nuts I didn’t realize you were part of a gang. You really do need help! (g-g-gulp and so do I)



June 29, 2021
what’s wonderful about “into the woods” is that all the characters go into the woods

I was in Wells, Vermont, then Queensbury, New York, then Wells Vermont again last week to watch other people have a vacation. The following section is largely unrelated to that apart from where the photoglops were taken!


i don’t want to try and deny The Jade Lightbulb or Emerald Lamppost or whatever he’s calling himself a livelihood but “pests” ARE nature’s way.


it really is about time for somebody to TAKE OUT the trash since it seems to be accumulating unnatural characteristics and colors.
I figured out that the object on the left is supposed to be a chicken leg, am not certain if the drink has a face or just the cup, and likewise am not certain which of those is worse.

yes indeed they are STILL here for you on the opposite end of the sign. I suppose i appreciate this proactive approach; i need not worry about them coming for me since they are already here for me. I WOULD appreciate that the artist painted them fresh on both sides rather than printing the same image twice but it is also badly drawn food with ugly faces which I am against even on material that looks edible.


hey look it’s 40 Classic American Grille Oak, the world famous restaurant specializing in wood-based cuisine. It has a slightly lower art budget.

Yeah support local businesses, not multinational corporations that pay millions of dollars for super bowl advertisements every year to push their gross painted sugar sludge at children and adult children. I don’t think it is valid to use guilt as a marketing tactic when you promote yourself with pepsi logos. nor coke logos but those are more likely to be marketed at hokey old people who deserve what they get.

also this it isn’t actually open! but still very pepsi.


religious instruction is getting pretty abstract. the artist has a 1940s buck rogers concept of how space travel works, wearing fishbowl helmets and flying around with flame gurgitating jetpackages that somehow avoid incinerating your feet. Yet the very idea of outer space contradicts just about every biblical statement and subsequent illustration ever made regarding the concept of “the heavens” as being above earth. That can only occur if alternate earths or “dimensions” also exist, and thus this is really depicting more of a 1960s comic book sort of idea, and very much confounding the point! If I had kids I would NOT send them to an institution that deliberately confuses the gold and silver ages. This is outright heresy.

As I understand the multiple earths were introduced primarily to allow writers to take over a character and bring back an older version that they liked better which a previous writer had erased from continuity, and then eventually even the multiple earths started getting their stories rewritten. in fact scriptural accounts of what “heaven” “is” contradict each other just as much, and the persistence of worldwide religions suddenly makes sense to me when I consider them to simply be fandom for ancient cartoon heroes, which I was also very bored with as a small child. I had as much of a choice about going to catholic church thirty years ago as kids these days have about getting elsa and baby yoda shoved at them as soon as possible, probably in utero once technology permits it. I don’t know if it is even POSSIBLE to get baby products that don’t have pictures of mickey mouse or elmo on them unless you go quite out of your way to procure them, or make them yourself, which you probably won’t unless you are Amish or part of a doomsday cult.


something is really unsettling about this ventriloquist puppet. it looks less like it was designed and built than a real person was cursed and turned into it. I presume it either dines at oak grille or is dined upon there.

apparently the character is a local advertising fixture, or the company wants people to believe it is. the ads are incredibly low energy, badly edited and depressing in how zany they think they are.


this is probably the best produced and most openly surreal one they have and it still makes me uncomfortable. That “aren’t we mischievous!” piano music is on all of them, except one that blatantly steals the piano music from charlie brown christmas, which is a substantially worse video but it only features the guy since he apparently hadn’t adopted the puppet gimmick yet and it makes me VERY uncomfortable so I am not linking to it! Despite not bothering to change his voice or disguise his mouth movements while operating the puppet –though sometimes there are weird, slow cuts to the puppet alone with the guy just suddenly not there– he still has a more bearable presence once he is partnered with a pretend person made out of wood, even a fraction of the skill or emotional investment of someone like Paul Winchell. Yes indeed at one point in history this was a legitimate form of entertainment that performers worked at rather than a weird embarrassing curiosity to make people remember what your business is called. It seems to subconsciously communicate: “obviously there is something seriously wrong with this man, you may feel better about yourself in comparison.”


children should not drink alcohol, unless they are chemotherapy patients delivering fav brand wine on a skateboard.

i examined the reverse oriented version on the left side of the car and while the large WINE and LIQUOR text is intact the “artist” neglected to correct the text on the bottle or the hat! How could anyone not notice this? Please, how? I want to not notice and think about stupid garbage like this.

And then I had to recheck the proper version and in fact the hat text is gibberlish. Presumably this image was auto-vectorized from a line drawing by someone not familiar with all the settings or who simply did not care, such as whoever drew it in the first place. The hat would have been better left blank or adorned with another wine bottle drawing WITHOUT letters on it. isn’t this interesting?


eh last week was very boring and unproductive! I have been trying for days to make some sort of update out of what I saw and the most interesting part was driving through

Winhall Vermont, ancestral home of the world’s most famous S.

which I was not able to get a picture of until leaving! I saw it on the entry trip but was positioned improperly to photograph it. Truly I thought about it for eight days. Thankfully it was not detailed as a backwards s on the north-bound side! maybe liquor kid should have one of these on his hat since it is so sensible. Again I would very much like to not think about that.



June 10, 2021
Snakes are actually more scared of humans than we are of them, experts explain


this month is, as an increasing number of businesses want to tell me, a “pride month.” Specifically with regard to whom you do or do not want to have sexual relations. But I do not know how to be proud of something that I did not have a choice about or work to achieve, particularly when the things I DID work to achieve I am also often not proud of! Even if I could manage it, experience has shown that no established group represents any of my own interests, especially as more and more of the symbols are co-opted by global corporations that are larger than many national governments. I am destined to be confused and alone! Is it possible I am proud of THAT? I hope not. But I am confused and consequently uncertain.


Contrary to what deviantart and world-class comedian Fortune Feimster suggest, my true self’s pride is not what it creates with, but what with which it distances itself from other people.
i do appreciate that the person i never heard of being shoved at me today by a corporate entity is not a fraction of my age and famous for smirking on youtube or singing shoddy songs, but I still find no fun or camaraderie in marketer-approved activities.

I used the pathetic snake in the illustration because it has and is problems closest to coinciding with my own, despite being subtly different in appearance from my self.
my “regular” characters are extremely proud of themselves but none of them know what “sex” is as far as I am aware. YOU may, naturally, be proud of whatever you want! this here is only about me. and it.

for other websites I named this piece “pride and precipice” because oh how droll it rhymes with the title of a book I never read. But I also realized that


years ago naming this painting “unimprecipe” must have made no sense. i confused “precipice,” a word for the edge of a cliff (specifically a vertical edge rather than the cartoonish, ready-to-crumble overhangs I prefer to draw but nobody knows that) with the evidently non-existent “precipe.” This is otherwise irrelevant to the present subject matter.

a few weeks earlier my mother had sent me a link to “asexuality, the ascent of the invisible sexual orientation” but which seemed to especially focus on “asexual” folk wanting to see more asexual folk on television, and I was not sure how to respond to the link-sender about it, and never did. I am not asking you to read that! I am merely issuing proof that it exists.

I appreciate my mother’s consideration, as twenty three years ago when I first knew I didn’t want to be called he him his, there was absolutely no way to bring up this topic and not encounter misery or mockery. I remember the first time I did I was asked by this person “do you want to be like TOBY?” a ridiculous ‘neuter’ person who had appeared on the Sally Jesse Raphael show, clips of which were subsequently shown and laughed at on the E channel’s Talk Soup program, which we both watched. I did not want to be like Toby. I still do not want to be like Toby.



it’s about 40 minutes, this link is just to prove it exists, I am not asking you to watch it!
Toby is boring and has a boring name, even though Toby’s stated approach to sexual matters and method of responding to people who are far too curious about it is similar to mine. Asexual is not the same as agender but they occupy the same “nobody is selling what I am buying” part of their respective spectrums. AND I don’t want anyone to sell it!

However I am not at all concerned about the more recent self-labeling asexuals’ “representation.” Any group with photogenic representatives will eventually get represented in photography, and they are certainly prettier than Toby. They will get what they want. I do not seek representation, as I do not trust anyone else to achieve it. What I want is to be believed and accepted when I describe my own condition, not have to check a box and not have to choose a flag. Maybe news of self-described asexuals would reach more neuro-normal fans of awful media, and after long enough eventually be believed by them, and make it easier to describe my own problem to them, but that would be a side-effect.


Admittedly I have in the past appreciated fictional characters that are never shown to have outwardly sexual identities, like Samus, Tintin, even dumb old Rygar. I don’t need an official seal of “by the way they’re ASEXUAL!” to appreciate that they do something important without romance screwing things up. And I would continue to prefer them if labeled asexuals started appearing in crummy tv shows, having that be their core defining trait and being exactly like every other annoying complacent smirking jeans-wearing forklogan I don’t like otherwise.
And I do like Olive Oyl, Dynamite Headdy and certain Batmans, who sometimes have their decision-making skills impaired by the appearance of romance potential, because they are able to remain interesting. Sailor Moon is perfectly capable of both fighting evil by moonlight and winning love by daylight. What I don’t like are gross, boring “sex scenes” and contrived pairings, like when a woman and man fight each other a lot and then out of nowhere start kissing, I can’t stand it.

it is the “love” as a completely embarrassing and forced plot device that I cannot tolerate. I may also experience difficulty tolerating the people who tolerate them! Even if asexuals never do this I have every confidence that terrible writers will think of other disconcertingly moronic things for them to do instead.


I can imagine the gay porn test being a quad-annual requirement for renewing your asexual license.

I don’t even like the WORD “sex” and I think “ace” sounds stupid but that isn’t necessarily the fault of anyone I am griping about today.


apparently there are rings you can buy or forge to grant yourself the magical power to not want to do sex. I should be grateful to not need one, perhaps. I suppose the idea is to identify yourself so you can be found and find others with a similar condition without having to be very ostentatious and PROUD. A little black ring is more discreet than a big dumb flag. I don’t like having constricting trinkets stuck to my skin, though. I have never even been able to wear a watch, back when people wore watches. A ring is worse since it will either be too tight or inclined to fall off and get lost, and I would want to constantly fiddle with and adjust it before then.


and now I need a flag to let everyone know I am a fiddler!



May 20, 2021
hinky dinky was basically out of the price range, way too expensive for me to shop there

6 percent state sales zax


welcome to stop and shop

It is being reorganized; the one nearer to my previous location went through the same screwy phase last year, but this temporary sign is showing the obsolete 2008-2018 logo from when Stop and Shop was merged with the Mid-Atlantic supermarket chain “Giant,” which it no longer is, so I don’t understand why it is considered preferable to the logoless, proper sign that had been here two weeks ago.


it is a dinstinctily nonsensical logo, reminiscent of the incoherent mass of shapes beside the “L” in the dangelogo, so i noticed immediately when it stopped being used, and again with it reused.



I am getting mixed messages at this store. Or maybe just a mixed mess.

Despite the arrows, or perhaps to spite the arrows, people would blatantly walk the wrong way into the narrowest aisles and then just stand there like The Zax until *I* turned around and go out the opposite way I came in because I want to avoid a fight, which is the only reason I follow the arrows to begin with. I will obey a rule that makes no sense in order to prevent hypothetical conflict but I won’t hold up such a rule when conflict picks a fight with it. I will walk the wrong way over an arrow to get something at the end of the aisle and if nobody is facing me. Overall I want to not do anything that will get me faced.
Yes I drew that stupid header picture for this one bit. I initially intended to put the drawing with this section but I also don’t want a boring photograph of a shoddy storefront at the top of the website I provide to people who ask about my art drawings since somebody did recently and I would prefer such a person to be put off by an actual shoddy art piece.
I postponed finishing this for 2 weeks since other stuff kept happening and the store went and got rid of the stupid arrows and mask policy but the aisles are still a mess, and people are just as inclined to go full speed in a one-cart-wide space and not care if someone is in front of them facing the opposite direction. AND with the mask mandate lifted it did turn out that the person opposed to me was masked and I wasn’t, though I also wasn’t wearing an ugly baseball hat with a stupid slogan on it. Additionally I was not naked, sticking my posterior end out needlessly nor standing in a Charlie Chaplin pose, so disregard the rumors.


What kind of loser would drink this?

I couldn’t tell if twitter people who saw this a few weeks ago thought I was legitimately accusing seltzer drinkers of being losers or they simply don’t think napoleon jokes are funny. I do share a home with two seltzer drinkers and I greatly prefer when they DRINK the overpriced, fouled bubble water rather than pour a little bit into another drink and leave the cans all over the place.

Charmin is great toilet paper if you buy that for companionship
and for bad math but that seems to come standard at this point.


dumb fact: I have had charmin toilet paper in my house approximately one time, last april, at the height of the bogus toilet paper shortage when that was the only brand left in the store because everybody in town recognizes it is inferior at its primary stated purpose and also thoroughly incompatible with all the septic tanks common in a seaside locale that used to be all farms. Supposedly it was “septic safe” and my guess is they determined that by flushing one square and observing that the house didn’t explode. I likely used most of it for blowing my nose and diverted my strategic toilet paper for nose blowing reserve to active restroom duty.

apparently plumbers have particularly heavy excrement which makes them ideal test subjects

hey you want chips? you’ve come to the right six different places

two of which even say “chips” on the aisle markers


you want 50 percent discounts that don’t register when scanned, that the service desk will say will register at checkout, which don’t, which the attendant will key in an exception for but that the actual store manager won’t see the big deal about leaving mislabeled and having less-attentive customers pay full price for? apparently I do because I still shop here and simply took two and unscanned one the last time this happened because I didn’t want to need to show anyone that I was buying hamburger helper, much less making a fuss about not saving one dollar on it. It usually happens on stupid products, like 2 pound bags of york peppermint patricias or cans of cat food. The latter of which isn’t inherently embarrassing but I don’t want anyone thinking that I personally approve of the cat’s actions.


this discount was also fake but fortunately the math still worked out.

there are occasional “random” audits triggered when attempting to check out, which prompt an employee to approach your purchases and rescan them until the computer says they can stop which fortunately hasn’t bumped up against my personal manual override of their broken pricing system yet.
at the TIME i was buying these in single serve containers because I kept making the 64 ounce size go bad prematurely by chopping up bits of lemon and dropping them into the bottle to improve the flavor which I didn’t immediately realize was responsible for spoiling the fluid early. I have a great many personal tricks that don’t actually work because I do not know how to do proper research. For example, I have on occasion considered that the creature nemitz, while an inexcusable crumbum, might be compatible with the concept of plush toys, but imagined mits possession of horns would be a problem. However some time in 2019 my then four year old neice violet showed up with a stuffed animal that appeared to be a mixture between unicorn and octopus and it had a horn which looked rigid but was collapsible and i tried to poke my own eye with it and it didn’t hurt, and was difficult enough to seem like it wouldn’t happen by accident, which would presumably not-hurt slightly less, which meant an accurate doll nemitz was perhaps feasible, if not at all justifiable. I am inclined to believe there was a better way I could have determined how safe it was to jab my own eye without actually doing that.
Also the reason I didn’t post this two weeks ago was because I meant to find that unicorn octopus doll in this house so I could photograph it, and I didn’t, and then I forgot. Absolutely nemitz’s fault.


ALSO even that iced tea purchase is also outdated, because I have lately been so inclined to augment the iced tea I buy with additional lemon or additional tea I decided to just make my own full pot of it, today. Eh my concoction needs some tweaking, and I don’t think i saved any money yet either because it meant I had to buy a pitcher, I found one here, for $14. When I went to remove the internal components to wash it before using it, I discovered they were broken. When I went back to return and replace the item, knowing that the longer I put off doing that the more it seemed like I broke it, I found the four of the remaining pitchers ALSO had the same part broken.

However Stop and Shop is still a better store than Shop Rite, a substantially better store than Price Chopper, has very good deli meats and self-scanning machines that greatly improve the overall experience. I just like to complain.


There is always someone to blame.



March 28, 2021
I said, ‘How do I know I want to be Batman’s butler?’ It was the most ridiculous thing I had ever heard of. He said, ‘It may be worth over $100,000.’ So I said I was Batman’s butler.


I got this back in fourth grade, which was probably roundabout 1993, from a school book fair or something because I would buy ANY book of comic strips that appeared in a weird place, and the character looked sort of like Calvin of “and Hobbes” fame anyway, and I had all the books with actual Calvin in them. I had never seen this big Nate that is smaller than a pencil before and have not seen it since,

but apparently it found an audience somewhere eventually among influential scumbags.
I don’t know how you make a tv series about a kid who draws comic strips in his note books, or why you need to save money by making it 3d since it would probably cost 2 cents to animate the notebook sections, which easily comprised about a third of the natebook that I had, assuming the tv series doesn’t just opt for static images.

I still had the book, along with this from the same book fair, a large hard cover edition of Roald Dahl’s The Minpins, which wasn’t actually mine and I don’t know how I ended up with it, but had HAD it so long i stopped mentally being aware of it, and several Cracked Magazines in a trash bag where they’d been at least ten years as I was always weird about throwing things away, but amidst trying to get the house sold last June I finally did, and I guess this tv series being made is revenge. I don’t know anything about it except for that picture, but I don’t really need to; I am 80% assured to hate any animated series whatever it is, this just happens to be a character that I recognize.

But it does go to show, if you stick to your craft, 30 years later a soulless corporation may commission an ugly computer mockery of it while desperate for new material not spun off from stuff they’ve had on the air almost as long or produced by sexual predators they finally had to fire after too many people found out they were covering up predation.

All this is not to say I hated the comic strips; I preferred the Nate book to the Marvin book, and it was my first experience with the expletive “dang!,”


which prepared me to encounter GRAYDANG in doom some time later, but I didn’t care enough to make an effort to track down more of Nate’s biggery. Meanwhile I eventually acquired each Calvin volume, though admittedly those were more common sights in book stores and finite in number.

I remember being really bothered by the way Lincoln Peirce drew the breast zone on Nate’s sister Ellen and apparently later other characters. I do not understand how this is preferable to not detailing a character’s chest at all.

However the bignate fandom wiki, which exists, features graphics which indicate this specific matter was toned down at some point. Peirce still draws mouths on the fronts of the heads regardless of what way they are facing.


the wiki also features up to the minute updates about which characters’ hair is pulled too close to their faces.

you are missing the bigger picture that Gina is a living cubist painting.


I additionally learned there was a big nate novel series by the same author that is REALLY banking on one remark from Jeff Kinney, whose “ugly comic strip about dork going to school excused by being ostensibly drawn by character in the comic” work actually came out a full 13 years after Lincoln Peirce’s and made heaps more money, and I wonder if Peirce knew the publisher was putting that line there. It is on all eight of the books,

and is also on reprint editions even less subtly. He definitely knew by then, I suppose.

Ah I said I hadn’t seen “big nate” since reading that book I had, but then I remembered I looked at its syndicate website at some point because I found and saved this extremely tacky strip from 2011.


I wonder how this works; how is a perpetual 12-year old commemorating the tenth anniversary of a national disaster that occurred when he was two years old? Or does this serve to acknowledge that he is in fact much older than that and simply not aging visually, like an elf?
Perhaps every moment of Nate’s life exists in its own separate timeline where he had been two years old ten years before, and in this one he has been surrounded by stories of heart-rending tragedy about nine-eleven and, unlike my cousin Delainey, about the same age, at the 9-eleven museum in New York City, or myself, mildly older than that on the actual nine-11, experiencing disillusionment and social terror at just existing every single day, totally over with being ordered to care about the one time people older than them experienced it, and got interviewed about it, and got validated in feeling that way, Nate REALLY relates to IX-XI. Alright that bully kid is STILL going to wreck that dopey pair of mounds, because the only thing bullies hate more than you standing there looking like that is you trying to get out of what’s coming to you. The only way to make bullies respect you is to beat them in a fight or make them laugh, and Nate, as the title character of a daily syndicated comic strip, is never going to substantially alter his behavior to get tougher or become funny so obviously those are both out. The only way that sand sculpture stays up is if bigger kid has mega right wing parents/guardianship that have hammered into him how SACRED 9-11 is, and new york’s FINEST, and the MEN AND WOMEN OVERSEAS, and PEARL HARBOR, and BOOTSTRAPS, in which case he is going to murder Nate and threaten Nate’s buddies into hiding the body for daring to invoke the divine power of 9-11. He will then call the newspapers, tell them he made the sand towers, get an award from the mayor and the city will make a bronze cast of it and display replicas at every intersection.


also: who the heck does this? places the end of their tongue out one side of their mouth to show how hard they are working. It is also in the title logo and apparently numerous other nate strips even without considering the logo. I sure don’t do that. I hate the feeling of tongues on my skin, whose-ever they may belong to. I would definitely have to scrape-wipe that part of my face afterward with tissue paper. I don’t think I have ever seen somebody outside of a comic strip or my mother’s description of a Norman Rockwell painting do that. And I don’t know what it’s called and searching for pictures based on the description is getting me way too many photographs of gross mouths so I cannot research this further. But my belief is that nobody really does this.
It is like talking while pointing one finger upward.



None of them are real people! I drew nemitz (orange annoying imp) doing it because nemitz does stupid things that are annoying, and even mit doesn’t engage in side-tonguing.


actually now that i think of it, the dork from goblins 3 looks sort of like nate (but not at all like calvin). they both have weird gravity-defying black spiked hair that looks more like grass and hold both feet in the exact same direction when facing to the side but only turn one of them and all the way around to face frontward, marking a considerable, charlie chaplin-esque posture change.


well THAT is the sort of thing i notice! too late to try and change it now.

some people notice other things.


this has no relevance but it is the specific inspiration for me referring to dopes as “decadent” on one or more occasions.



January 24, 2020
Cavill’s reshoots were scheduled around Paramount’s Mission: Impossible – Fallout, a film for which he was contractually obligated to keep his mustache.


page 45 of the inexplicably ongoing comic strip
it features copious views of areas where i really don’t know what is supposed to go in them, like the blue part of the building’s outside wall. apparently the only other time i showed this area was page 3-2, where i didn’t make it blue and put yellow grass there in a way that makes no sense, and it wasn’t zoomed in close enough that there was massive void like here filling the void here with lines and angles seems to work but it feels really lazy.
3-1, the page before it shows that there is a sort of tunnel in that spot but I recall in a previous update noticing the inconsistency about the tunnel and resolved to just not have a tunnel there because there are more pictures without it than with it and they are all small. I ought to edit the pages where it DOES appear so i stop rediscovering this inconsistency re-evaluating which way is correct because eventually I will choose the other way and that will make an even more longwinded stupid problem.

Out of nowhere between 410 and 420am i decided the green elf should have one earring, and once that was enacted it instantly seemed like i should have made this gnome be the less wimpy of the two here. The script seems to have them trade off which one is more aggressive than the other, which is probably frustrating as a reader. None of the gnome stuff was well-planned or “planned.” i established previously that gnomes with hats that point straight up are aggressive but pathetic, so I don’t want to have this one also be like that. Really one of those should have been in this pair instead but I ALSO established or at least implied that these two specifically have some sort of partnership, so they should be together, without considering that there might not be any justification for it other than me having put them together the first time before I knew anything about them or that they would be appearing again. in fact they are part of a group of three but i ADDITIONALLY established that the third one isn’t in the gang and so would not be out searching for creature-imps to beat up. oh!



December 24, 2019
Like her sister Barbie, she has had numerous “acquaintances”, celebrity friends, fantasy friends, and Disney friends that were produced at her size.

I am almost sad the “cats” movie is flopping so hard since I was looking forward to getting angry at it not doing that.
cats is my least favorite musical work by somebody who I think has actual musical talent. Everything about it was annoying even before Rebel Wilson had a role in it.

my stance on cats is a matter of public record, but I will repeat it anyway because I’m sick, i need help.

Starlight Express is the gayest ostensibly heterosexual love story I have ever seen. Although to be fair I haven’t tried to watch Cats yet.

I have now listened to the “Cats” album in full and wish to apologize to Lord Andrew Webster for implying that it has a story.

And I wish also to apologize to Jonathan Larson 20 years after his death for ever saying Rent was the most annoying musical.

Cats is like if every song in Rent was sung-chanted by Angel and had nothing to do with the song before it.

Cats are like THIS! And cats do THAT! That’s how life IS if you’re a CAT!

I was embarrassed that I liked starlight express, overall, at times, but maybe I shouldn’t be since cats gets loads more respect.

I think Starlight Express was made specifically for people who like really stupid stage musicals but didn’t like Cats for why-ever

And also to help Andy Lloyd Lloyder replenish his stock of gold embroidered toilet paper.

I spread my “Chess” obsession across a few years but I want to try and get Starlight Express out of my system within the week.

I do not know what long-term psychological damage dwelling on it might be capable of.

I think Andy Pandy Webby is a substantially better composer than Stephen Sondheim, on account of his music actually having discernible tunes. If Webbo is guilty of plagiarism at least he picks good targets. But there is a reason Jesus Christ Superstar got made into a movie almost immediately and Cats took almost my entire lifetime, apart from one being a god story and the other a there is no god story. Which reminds me, christmas is tomorrow!


Gosh it’s finally here I can’t wait

I drew the sketch in 2016 during a particularly regrettable period in my life and forgot about it, then last year my younger brother was going to appear at some sort of comedy event where Artie Lange was also going to appear, so i colored and purged the uncanny valley from it in anticipation of promoting the event with this, but then the brother dropped for a reason that I wouldn’t have because gosh if somebody is PAYING me to do what i ASPIRE to do and I was sharing a venue with somebody else who made a career out of it why would I not, that would get me more respect than drawing dopey fursonas ever has, and I suddenly had no excuse to justify bringing it up again and I forgot it again. unfortunately, i remembered.
ALSO it seems that in 2017 Lange had a series of incidents which among other things have rendered his nose in a state that makes it seem perpetually pressed against a plate of glass, so as barely recognizable as this drawing was it is now quite less so, and then I suppose already had been at the time when I meant to show it. I only learned that today when debating whether to tag him in the post on instagram. I decided not to because I wanted to tag both of them and if the other guy has an instagram page it didn’t come up fast enough for me to not start getting nauseated at other people’s posts mentioning him and great bimpity frimpity look at this dumb garbage who cares it isn’t worth that much anxiety.

In other Lindy news he recently appeared without my being prepared for it in the HBO series “his dark materials,” where he portrays the character Lee Scoresby, who gets into fistfights and shoots monsters with a gun and is utterly unconvincing, and apart from that is incredibly distracting being a ubiquitous media celebrity in an ostensibly fantasy setting but fortunately only in half the episodes and not the only thing wrong with the program. One of which is uncertainty as to whom the titular “his” refers. The quantity of luminance in his materials is not a factor in my distaste for them, apart from maybe I would like his stupid beard better if it were invisible.

My opinion of whose-ever dark materials is also a matter of public record, but unlike “cats” was actually topical when I talked about it and I still couldn’t even manage a single meager “like” so there is less need to assume that was just because nobody saw the posts because I am sure someone did. if you look up related hash tags all the posts are just people who are already fans of that guy talking about how great he is on the show even though, as noted, he is usually NOT on the show and detrimental when he is. that’s probably WHY he was cast; he brings along an existing set of fans who aren’t very discerning. I am supposed to accept him as a surrogate father figure for the main character Lyra even though they hardly have any screen time together and when they do Lee is whining about having to work or demanding to be paid, which could be funny if he was funny but he isn’t. Lee Scoresby has about as much warmth as the equally nasally Enoch “Nucky” Thompson from the earlier hbo series Boardwalk Empire, which apparently loads of people watched when it was new, just nobody who I know or who knows me.
That comparison seems like a compliment since Enoch is portrayed by Steve Buscemi who a lot of people also like but Enoch is an unscrupulous gangster rather than a roguish ne’erdowell with a heart of gold.


this is a different character, i suppose it isn’t terribly important whom and that may work in my favor since the valley of uncanniness I mentioned earlier is less of a factor when you don’t know who a picture is SUPPOSED to look like.
yes I have hbo now, I am up to date on the premium channel shows that I for years resented The Media treating like everybody watched and kept up with back when i couldn’t, and now I don’t have regular cable and it is better, and apparently loads of people also are only using premium streaming television now rather than conventional broadcast services, and once again we still have no idea what each other are talking about.

but this is christmas, right? I should do something nice for someone. tying up old mental baggage so I don’t talk about it where other people can hear it is a gooder deed than I typically manage.



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
Titash
pc72
Pickford
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

i warned you about this
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    old webpages
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    03-03-2007
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    02-22-2007
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    12-10-2006
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    07-01-2006
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    06-04-2006
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    04-24-2006
    Dennises are dead to me
    04-17-2006
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    04-08-2006
    This page is not about shoes.
    03-22-2006
    I hate shoes.
    03-11-2006
    something award related
    03-04-2006
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    02-26-2006
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    01-28-2006
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    07-20-2005
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    11/14/03
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    09/14/03
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    06/14/03
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    03/31/03
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    12/11/02
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    10/15/02
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    10/14/02
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    other things
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    mysterious
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    05/28/10
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    09/17/04
    Embarrassing pictures 2
    The same
    Umiliphus (my old derivative megamen sprite comic
    08/15/03
    Hopeless.swf
    11/24/04, (I can only justify this by calling it an experiment, so I shall)
    sandwich.swf
    02/16/05
    FACK
    ??/??/??
    Poetry Page
    The same