January 30, 2017

I have seen people promoting 2016 as the worst year for all humanity ever on the basis of all the celebrities that got dead, such as legendary Breath-Assure pitch-man George Kennedy and Zsa Zsa Gabor, and also Donaldo Trump’s presidenty election (even though he had yet to institute any executive orders). However, there is definitely an insufferable undercurrent of hyperbole to all the commentary I observe.

Regardless, most years-in-review focused exclusively on entertainment, and tried and yet try to suggest we are in the happiest, most talented, most gol-durned glorious period of all human existence, and consequently anything we don’t like must be the worst ever. And it just isn’t true. There is just more forced happiness and more push to not criticize something that is politically aligned with you than ever.

Yes I am still irritated about stupid hamilton. But it isn’t ONLY hamilton. However, seeing hamilton’s existence in the context of the forced enthusiasm makes me disinclined to doubt myself exclusively on the basis of my tendency to doubt myself. I saw the new Star Wars movie, and I saw the one last year, and both are nice, but are either special? Not really. Although I do not necessarily think the originals were the best movies of all time, but they weren’t desperately trying to remind me of themselves. Every movie that is made now wants to be thought of as existing now in today, the ultimate point of all times.

Lord of the Rings 3, there we go, something I like that won a record setting or matching number of osc-awards. Including “Best Song” despite my not having any recollection of any singing, background or otherwise, in the film, because it only plays over the credits, which makes it a matter apart from the film, really. As if the only reason the song is there at all is to be award-eligible. I am to believe this 11-award winning film is superior to films that just won 10 even though one of the awards is for something that isn’t even IN it. You might as well give an Academy award for best preview, best red carpet premier or best bootleg back of box summary. And maybe we will once we run out of records to advertise that we broke. I liked the movie but would not call it significantly superior to the other two. My favorite part is how long it is, which is the thing other people hate! Anyway all that was 13 years ago by this point, so we need to hurry and give even more awards to La la la la Land! Only the stuff that we like NOW can have the most awards! Best La! Best Land! Best title word duplication!

Although having said that, if La La Land does not at least win the best song award, and observe it is in there TWICE, that means Sting, Justin Timberload or Lin-Manuel Miramilton is getting one, so we keep it in the family whatever happens. Breaking news, somebody I’m already tired of gets more attention! I appreciate that Sting has the one song on there that by its title does not seem to be about forced smiling optimism, and furthermore does not have a page written about it already. Also, Sting at least is old. It makes sense that I am tired of him.

Gimme a break! They only GAVE that to you because you’re already famous!

There HAS been public figure-provided resistance to La Land Land, but primarily on the basis of it being “white people” entertainment. Which it IS, and I suppose we allow that since white people can presumably “take it,” but how much of that are they required to take before it is no longer considered a “dangerous” fascist viewpoint to criticize a decidedly non-white product for not being white enough? In fact Hamilton itself expressly forbade caucasian actors from even auditioning. Because it wanted to tell a story with non-white people (ignoring the fact that in terms of personal mannerisms and skin-tone, Lindy himself, praise be upon his name, is just as white as I am (in fact I might claim I am less white than he is since I didn’t go to private kindergarten, neither of my parents are doctors and one even stole a bunch of stuff)). And fiddle-dee-doodle it is allowed to do that. The only people who go out of their ways to be offended by that are INSANE. And as somebody who had to spend the 1990s pretending I didn’t hate the Beastie Boys to keep myself sane, I can tell you their annoyance to me was not owed to them being white. It was because they were tone-deaf screeching cretins. I don’t give a barbecue if one of them is dead now or supported great causes. If you would have me believe that La “The La” Land would be a perfect movie if it had all the same dialog, same songs, same dances, same smiles, but none of the actors were white, you would be just as much part of the problem as anybody. It is fun to call stuff “white” as a joke but we ought not accept that as a valid journalistic explanation for mediocrity.

Michael Phelps won the most gold medals of anybody, which is an objective accomplishment in a skill-based venue, whom nobody wants to disqualify on basis of extreme whiteness, and I got sick of him, even. The “greatest olympian of all time” ? Not really. All he did was swim (non-synchronously), and in an artificial environment. And it seemed like he got another medal each time he did it. in contrast to pentathlon competitors who need to do five different things that have nothing to do with each other (including Show Jumping on a dingdang HORSE), or team sport competitors who need to win four lengthy games across a week, thereby preventing them from competing in anything else, to get ONE medal. And of course Phelps worked for the Wenited States, who consistently have the most money and best resources for training, and the second-largest vat from which to pull eligible competitors. They almost consistently win the most gold medals in general. Only China doesn’t have an excuse for always losing (and it DID get the most gold at least in Summer 2008). I am past past past the point of caring if an American is the best at an athletic frivolity. If Michael Phelps won ONE swimming gold medal AND a badminton gold medal, by finkeldy then I would be impressed.

But Hamilton guy acts AND writes AND composes! And he drifts into songs from “Camelot” during interviews just like I probably would! THAT should impress me, right? No, because I hate his stupid beard. (also as of 2019 I have been forced through Moana multiple times and can say with total sincerity that I think its songs are awful)

I like Game of Thrones. Is it the best tv show ever? I would not say that it was. However, I have not seen every tv show ever. And to be fair, the format was greatly limited for a very long time. The 1980s and early 1990s were dominated by syndication, which likes to be able to air episodes in any order at any time of day and it wants a huge mess of the things, while reserving the right to dump any that it doesn’t like. There was less potential money, and consequently more difficulty in procuring investment in programs with limited numbers of episodes that don’t make sense unless all are seen, one after the other. Realistically it is only valid to compare Thronegame to shows made within the past twenty years, and I haven’t seen all of them either!

But people will tell you with total doubtless confidence that it is best ever and best there ever will be, and ignore that they ever said that when the next trendy manly abusefest comes along. I think it could have been made with less cruelty, and less contrariness for the sake of being contrary. But I appreciate that it was permitted to be as cruel as it thought it needed to be. YES I watched all 60 episodes of it across a few months. But I could have lived without it. And I DID live without it for the first six years of its existence. And I am probably better for not having made any attempt to interact with the dumb fan cult around it (or anything). And also for the huge sacks of cash it would take to subscribe to the Hibbo network for ten or fewer episodes a year. I can get the dvds for free from a library! Or other ways.

There is no real fantasy in film anymore. Every one wants me to believe it is real, and filled with real people, and realer and nower than what came before it. Even when something is ludicrous from the outset, with your sharknadoes, snakes on planes and cowboys vs aliens, they are not sincere works of expression by filmmakers. They mean for you to think they are “badass” in how awful they are, like all those oafs with tv shows about them eating huge heaps of rancid meat. I remember being surprised when I learned Guy Fieri was a chef; I literally thought he was just some GUY, hence the name, who drove around shoving awful things in his mouth. And not because it is entertaining but because and I’ll have to get back to you on that. Because this is AMERICA. We don’t need to do something awful to ourselves for a reason. Once again, we have the president we deserve.

There is no fantasy in film anymore. Every one wants me to believe it is real, and filled with real people, and realer and nower than what came before it.
When the film Spider-Man was released in 2002, that was a new fast paced realistic spider-man unlike all past spidermen. Then in 2012 there was another spider-man even newer than that one. And apparently now there is a third newest spider-man and I am completely desensitized to it. What is he going to do that the other spidermen didn’t do which makes them obsolete? Is he going to save Uncle Ben? Is he going to get power by biting a spider? Is he going to skip the dumb origin story and trying to live a Normal Life for 75% of the movie and get to the point for once?

For that matter, I have completely lost track of or interest in swervy altered or updated “fairy tales.” And I had ten years ago. Every movie coming out looks like something I’ve seen before even though each one is purporting to be a new version of something I have seen before.
Just in my lifetime I have seen 3 spidermen, 5 batmen, 26 Cinderellas, 8 ghostbusters, not including extreme Ghostbusters or Filmation Ghost-hyphen-Busters, plus 4 Colonel Sanderses. None of these things function without presuming familiarity on my part.

For the last 2.5 decades solid, live action films are never rated G unless they are garbage for toddlers. Everything else must have realistic violence, abusive language, real sadness and offense emotion, and sex oh teehee.
Although I must note that the 1940 Errol Flynn feature film “The Sea Hawk,” which I inadvertently witnessed a piece of recently, is openly rated G as determined by a film review board that came into existence long after it did, despite the production showing whipped slave labor, death by musket, death by cutlass, presumed death by drowning and disdain for another nation on the basis of it being one. The British men I am meant to want to win try to board the Spanish ship by throwing Rygar grappling hooks, one of which catches a Spaniard in the neck. There is no blood but the recipient is plainly in pain and not able to get it loose. And of course all the important people are white men. Nonetheless the film is unmistakably a fantasy: everybody talks in a funny way, they are not afraid of the danger they are in and the music is jolly despite mass mutual deceasement for the parties depicted. I am meant to enjoy the depicted exploits without believing the on-screen characters share my culture, goals or fears.

It is possible older films would have been less fantasy-like if they had been permitted to do so by the standards of their times, but I think also film-goers appreciated escapism in a way that present American audiences don’t, or are not encouraged to. War to 1940s Americans wasn’t just something that other people had to deal with. Ironically of course there are American troops right now in more countries than ever. We offer this to them in lieu of medals!

Good news, you get as many gold arches as you can fit on your side of the wall!

25 Responses
  1. 1
    2:42 pm, January 30, 2017

    Indighost sez:

    Here’s a tangential question for you. Similar to you, I am part of the “chat group” for a certain artist that I like and buy commissions from, he is good at depicting weird and creepy creatures and I like when he does his creatures, other people’s creatures, and my creatures.

    Recently he made a big announcement that he agrees with Donald Trump’s wacky policies.

    I wasn’t sure what to say, if anything. I ended up saying something like “I think those policies are wacky”–really just that, repeated in 2 or 3 sentences in response to his blathering, which is similar in length and ranty-ness to yours here. Then the conversation went elsewhere and everybody was fine.

    Was that wrong? Does that mean that any future commissions I buy from him will be tinged with political resentimentaions? Should I have pretended to agree or just said “Uh huh.” or “:)” ?

  2. 2
    3:03 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    I do not think Trump is a total idiot, but he acts without any appearance of empathy and at least seems just as inclined to ignore environmental atrocities as anybody else from his party. If he wants common folk to behave reasonably he must do something to appease them to some degree.

    I would not mix trash art with politics, though. Generally the people that I want to buy from are nitwits in various ways apart from that. Always buying into the ideology and dumb cults of others without questioning what they are told. A mere coin’s flip worth of circumstances determines what leaders they support, it often seems.

  3. 3
    3:34 pm, January 30, 2017

    Indighost sez:

    It does seem.

    That said, visualize this. What if I told you: “I think GOT is the best ever, new films is best ever, Politics is worst ever! Oh and here’s $100, please draw me a cow.” What kind of cow would you draw?

  4. 4
    3:36 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    I would request details and not accept the money until my preliminary sketch was approved.

  5. 5
    3:37 pm, January 30, 2017

    Indighost sez:

    Let’s assume that I provided XYZ details and approved the sketch. What then?

  6. 6
    3:38 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    If told to choose my own cow, I would have to survey what sort of cows were available. It is more than I would investigate on hypothesis alone, however, so I do not know more than that.

  7. 7
    3:39 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    oh oh ah ha. Well then I would take the money, yes.

  8. 8
    3:40 pm, January 30, 2017

    Indighost sez:

    I’m not sure you understood. The purpose of my thought experiment is that I want to know if, I behaved appropriately as a commissioner, would disagreeing with the artist in some way totally unrelated to the art, cause artistic problems?

  9. 9
    3:40 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    I am not opposed to cows. Only garish bright pink cartoon udders.

  10. 10
    3:43 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    THAT would depend on how personally invested I was in something. My sense of self is not tied to my personal preferences in media or government policies. My life is enough of a dump that my problems are much closer to me than that.

  11. 11
    3:44 pm, January 30, 2017

    Indighost sez:

    I think I should have kept my cows in the barn for this question XD

  12. 12
    3:44 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    also this comment form is bad for real time discussions!

  13. 13
    3:45 pm, January 30, 2017

    Indighost sez:

    I see, I see, I see. I think that all will be well, then. Thank you for partcipiating in this disjointed conversation!

  14. 14
    3:46 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    if you required that I concede that certain content creators with more recognition were superior to myself, or implied it through having me draw their concepts, that I might object to, or execute in a manner that made clear my disagreement with the statement, and you probably would not want to pay me.

  15. 15
    3:50 pm, January 30, 2017

    Indighost sez:

    The person I am commissioning also made it ones of his rules that other artists are never to be mentioned or to be compared with his work, and I have been careful to obey ALL of his rules! He even asked me to remove all gross items from my request and I bowed utterly to that. The only art related disagreement was he suggested having my creature run and jump and I said that it should swim or sleep.

  16. 16
    3:54 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    I do not want to be one of those crazy persons with an obscene quantity of rules. For the most part my personal gripes are unlikely to arise. And the longer my list gets, the more inquirers invent other unpleasant things that I didn’t even think to ask them not to do. I have bought things, and i know how irritating it is to deal with egotistical people who will not justify their behavior.

  17. 17
    3:58 pm, January 30, 2017

    Indighost sez:

    I know what you mean. Art is also odd because can only be done in a certain way by 1 person.

  18. 18
    4:02 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    Anybody can be imitated. I like to imagine nobody could write for my characters as I could, but the truth of the matter is that the most particular things are ones only I would notice, so with me out of the picture but well imitated, nobody would notice. They might even prefer it. If I were a famous sort there would be throngs of dorks doing exactly what I do almost as well or technically better.

  19. 19
    4:08 pm, January 30, 2017

    Indighost sez:

    I don’t think so. The fact that you yourself have seen that all these re-hashed re-branded pre-quel throw-back imitation movies these days are junk, and a lot of other people also know that, I think, proves that the originality of art is a thing.

  20. 20
    4:14 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    When a corporate contract is involved, only one version prevails. Instead of “exactly what I do,” I should say “exactly the sort of thing that I appear to do.” There would be imitation of styles, methods and principles.

    But definitely there ARE people who regard the imitation movies as almost as good or better. Maybe not everybody! But I never made anything as high in profile as star wars that it could or would be analyzed so widely that imitations could be picked apart.

  21. 21
    4:17 pm, January 30, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    Certainly when requesting drawings from people there are things that I think obvious that are regularly overlooked. Such as nemitz not having brown horns, or not having four fingers. So LESS-obvious things, like kumquat standing in a weird manner or not using contractions would be yet-more easily missed.

    And beyond that there are things I have stated specifically like “this character wears shoes” while not providing any indication of what the unshoed feet look like that have been ignored. Anything is possible.

  22. 22
    1:13 pm, January 31, 2017

    Purplespace sez:

    Who is still going around telling you Hamilton is the best thing ever? Their favorite commercial must be the one where the guy can’t pronounce the name of the person that shot Alexander Hamilton.
    I am curious why so many people unhappy with Trumples made such a big commotion? Do they think people would have done something if they had just destroyed a few more automobiles or got on stages threatening to destroy even more government buildings?
    Also, I’ve seen some artists that say they will charge more for complicated characters with things like wings! How squawkward!

  23. 23
    3:19 pm, January 31, 2017

    Frimpinheap sez:

    Much of this I wrote before the end of the year, and several matters came back up in a year-end retrospective on 60 minutes and then also the regular evening news, both of which I do mean to avoid by this point. Awareness yet remains one of my greatest adversaries.

    I mean to charge more at people who ask me for unfair things but I hardly ever do. I keep thinking: I should be kind to those who are “friends.” But it is not often a kindness they are keen to recognize.

    Trump I hope I am through defending; he doesn’t appreciate my extra effort either!
    I think violent members of protests do not necessarily care for the cause; they wait for chaos regardless of the reason and mix in so they can wreck and/or steal things.

  24. 24
    1:47 am, March 5, 2019

    Prescription Pudding Pinged With:

    […] despite being older than me and totally appropriated by commercialism. The Media is controlled by white people who are afraid of looking racist if they claim to not like rap or don’t have enough black people on screens even if fewer […]

  25. 25
    6:38 pm, July 8, 2020

    Prescription Pudding Pinged With:

    […] said it in 2017, Mirandy is just as tri-state-area white as I am, he just happens to have ancestors from a different […]

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them`s fightin` woids: September 23, 2020
Charmlatan sez:
You owe your loyal readers an omelet!
September 23, 2020
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They would not fit in the frame, so I could not show the irrelevant Yibrick grabbing them!...
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Maybe choose the one with the cowboy hat?
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