June 29, 2021

I was in Wells, Vermont, then Queensbury, New York, then Wells Vermont again last week to watch other people have a vacation. The following section is largely unrelated to that apart from where the photoglops were taken!

i don’t want to try and deny The Jade Lightbulb or Emerald Lamppost or whatever he’s calling himself a livelihood but “pests” ARE nature’s way.

it really is about time for somebody to TAKE OUT the trash since it seems to be accumulating unnatural characteristics and colors.
I figured out that the object on the left is supposed to be a chicken leg, am not certain if the drink has a face or just the cup, and likewise am not certain which of those is worse.

yes indeed they are STILL here for you on the opposite end of the sign. I suppose i appreciate this proactive approach; i need not worry about them coming for me since they are already here for me. I WOULD appreciate that the artist painted them fresh on both sides rather than printing the same image twice but it is also badly drawn food with ugly faces which I am against even on material that looks edible.

hey look it’s 40 Classic American Grille Oak, the world famous restaurant specializing in wood-based cuisine. It has a slightly lower art budget.

Yeah support local businesses, not multinational corporations that pay millions of dollars for super bowl advertisements every year to push their gross painted sugar sludge at children and adult children. I don’t think it is valid to use guilt as a marketing tactic when you promote yourself with pepsi logos. nor coke logos but those are more likely to be marketed at hokey old people who deserve what they get.

also this it isn’t actually open! but still very pepsi.

religious instruction is getting pretty abstract. the artist has a 1940s buck rogers concept of how space travel works, wearing fishbowl helmets and flying around with flame gurgitating jetpackages that somehow avoid incinerating your feet. Yet the very idea of outer space contradicts just about every biblical statement and subsequent illustration ever made regarding the concept of “the heavens” as being above earth. That can only occur if alternate earths or “dimensions” also exist, and thus this is really depicting more of a 1960s comic book sort of idea, and very much confounding the point! If I had kids I would NOT send them to an institution that deliberately confuses the gold and silver ages. This is outright heresy.

As I understand the multiple earths were introduced primarily to allow writers to take over a character and bring back an older version that they liked better which a previous writer had erased from continuity, and then eventually even the multiple earths started getting their stories rewritten. in fact scriptural accounts of what “heaven” “is” contradict each other just as much, and the persistence of worldwide religions suddenly makes sense to me when I consider them to simply be fandom for ancient cartoon heroes, which I was also very bored with as a small child. I had as much of a choice about going to catholic church thirty years ago as kids these days have about getting elsa and baby yoda shoved at them as soon as possible, probably in utero once technology permits it. I don’t know if it is even POSSIBLE to get baby products that don’t have pictures of mickey mouse or elmo on them unless you go quite out of your way to procure them, or make them yourself, which you probably won’t unless you are Amish or part of a doomsday cult.

something is really unsettling about this ventriloquist puppet. it looks less like it was designed and built than a real person was cursed and turned into it. I presume it either dines at oak grille or is dined upon there.

apparently the character is a local advertising fixture, or the company wants people to believe it is. the ads are incredibly low energy, badly edited and depressing in how zany they think they are.

this is probably the best produced and most openly surreal one they have and it still makes me uncomfortable. That “aren’t we mischievous!” piano music is on all of them, except one that blatantly steals the piano music from charlie brown christmas, which is a substantially worse video but it only features the guy since he apparently hadn’t adopted the puppet gimmick yet and it makes me VERY uncomfortable so I am not linking to it! Despite not bothering to change his voice or disguise his mouth movements while operating the puppet –though sometimes there are weird, slow cuts to the puppet alone with the guy just suddenly not there– he still has a more bearable presence once he is partnered with a pretend person made out of wood, even a fraction of the skill or emotional investment of someone like Paul Winchell. Yes indeed at one point in history this was a legitimate form of entertainment that performers worked at rather than a weird embarrassing curiosity to make people remember what your business is called. It seems to subconsciously communicate: “obviously there is something seriously wrong with this man, you may feel better about yourself in comparison.”

children should not drink alcohol, unless they are chemotherapy patients delivering fav brand wine on a skateboard.

i examined the reverse oriented version on the left side of the car and while the large WINE and LIQUOR text is intact the “artist” neglected to correct the text on the bottle or the hat! How could anyone not notice this? Please, how? I want to not notice and think about stupid garbage like this.

And then I had to recheck the proper version and in fact the hat text is gibberlish. Presumably this image was auto-vectorized from a line drawing by someone not familiar with all the settings or who simply did not care, such as whoever drew it in the first place. The hat would have been better left blank or adorned with another wine bottle drawing WITHOUT letters on it. isn’t this interesting?

eh last week was very boring and unproductive! I have been trying for days to make some sort of update out of what I saw and the most interesting part was driving through

Winhall Vermont, ancestral home of the world’s most famous S.

which I was not able to get a picture of until leaving! I saw it on the entry trip but was positioned improperly to photograph it. Truly I thought about it for eight days. Thankfully it was not detailed as a backwards s on the north-bound side! maybe liquor kid should have one of these on his hat since it is so sensible. Again I would very much like to not think about that.

7 Responses
  1. 1
    7:38 pm, July 3, 2021

    pindohodo sez:

    In spite of what I may think of its artistic quality, I do like seeing that sort of handmade signage for businesses around town. You know, even though it’s mostly less-than-professional quality, it has a charm that all the slick corporate advertisements lack. But that Vacation Bible School poster was obviously Clip Art, and I wonder if they don’t just plan the bible lessons around whatever public domain images they’re going to use for the posters that summer! I thought the puppet was OK as far as puppets go, which isn’t very far without help. Finally, my only theory about those conspicuous greenish parts on the food sign is that the sunlight has caused the pigment to fade into that sickie green. Well, see, I’m assuming that the chicken leg and pizza crust were brown to begin with, and since red tends to fade before other colours, you’d be left with whatever else the red was mixed with to get that brown, which usually involves some green, which fades more slowly since it’s further down the colour spectrum and isn’t affected as much by UV light, natchurally!
    But anyway, I hope you at least enjoyed parts of the trip, if not the whole thing :)

  2. 2
    1:17 am, July 4, 2021

    Frimpinheap sez:

    I definitely prefer hand-painted signs to printed clip art, yes. the puppet i presume was purchased from a professional supplier, or maybe retrieved from the dumpster of one who had gone out of business decades ago which is why it at least looks the part when it isn’t moving.

    I learned something important from the trip, which is to never stay at a hotel not run by a company foremost in the hotel business, especially during covid season, since every pleasant perk like getting a free orange in the morning or having a sink in the same room with a toilet will either be “oops! not available” or held captive at an additional ridiculous premium. in queensbury was six flags’ “great escape lodge” which i expected to be a larger and improved version of the zero-flags “great wolf lodge” from 2019 or whenever that was, but it was worse because most of the money is put into the adjacent theme park which wasn’t open yet and is its own misery story to visit rather than the onsite facilities, whereas the wolf at least invested everything into one place and gives a generous breakfast buffet.

    and THAT is a hotel with an indoor water park in the same complex. my niece likes those things. these trips are planned around giving her a nice time. i have become more adaptable as I have gotten older but I have also lost patience with being someone else’s toy and having no privacy or time to work on things that I understand.

    also I won’t again agree to stay at the homes of relatives on my mother’s side of the family without seeing a layout of the place first, because they tend to be of the opinion that generations after them should have things just as bad or worse than they did at the same age, if they give it consideration at all. and if it gets to the point where i need to book my own separate accommodations to preserve any sanity, then I am fine not going at all since I have plenty of other things to do, oh!

    this is more information than necessary but the more i think about it the less i want to write a follow-up post about the six flags content of the trip. I did it once because I didn’t know what it was, i did it a second time to see if it might improve, and i never need to do it again.

    There is ANOTHER week long trip coming at the end of July which promises to be more close-quarters with the same people. The difference is it will be at a proper hotel and I will be meeting people from my father’s side of the family instead, who I understand are miserable to plan a trip with but have always at least been more fun to be around.

    howdy what have I done with my life? this.

  3. 3
    5:55 pm, July 5, 2021

    Dhraiden sez:

    Country’s full of great wonders such that you delve; I’m glad someone else is out there musing obsessively over these things so I don’t have to!

  4. 4
    10:31 pm, July 6, 2021

    Frimpinheap sez:

    I am glad if there is anything to be glad about!

  5. 5
    10:24 pm, July 8, 2021

    Dhraiden sez:

    +1 for Kyrandia (I preferred Zanthia to Brandon)

  6. 6
    5:03 am, July 11, 2021

    Frimpinheap sez:

    It does help that part 2 is a better game with generally more logical clues, and consequently less of Zanthia’s success can retroactively be attributed to accident or dumb luck than Brandon’s. The third game’s treatment of both characters seems to present that as the official explanation.

  7. 7
    3:03 am, July 16, 2021

    Prescription Pudding Pinged With:

    […] say he sleeps in the bed, only that he’s “no dummy.” Because dummies advertise hard wood furniture and are slightly more convincing actors because I at least expect them to look […]

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them`s fightin` woids: July 20, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
instead of dopesona i recommend “dopes oh no” to let everyone know to keep away from...
July 19, 2021
Charmlatan sez:
Fantastic! I’ve been meaning to make a “dope-sona”, but why stop there when I can *become*...
July 11, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
It does help that part 2 is a better game with generally more logical clues, and consequently...
July 9, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
I seem to no longer have the video file on my present hard drive but I took the screenshot at may...
July 9, 2021
A hooberdoober sez:
I would imagine the purpose of the multiple, differently-angled belts in the second image is...
July 8, 2021
Frimpinheap sez:
because it is grey now
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