

I assume this similarity is deliberate but i do not know why it would be. i never watched double dare and thought “i really want to put that into my mouth.”


this similarity i assume is not deliberate
thank pog somebody scanned this book and put it on the internet; i was suffering mentally more than usual after spending an hour getting to this spot in the game from my nearest save-state and seeing the text say

“young owlbear” when i was CERTAIN it had always said “owlbear young” and that was the main reason the coconut was funny to me. I must have spent a lot of time doting on the generously oversized and overinformative instruction heap. it probably gave away TOO much of the game but sega genesis users in my home were more than capable of being terrible at it anyway and needing to develop sort of cheaty strategies to get through it.
if i couldn’t verify this i might have had to tell the story of how my younger brother (yes the alex jonesy one) while driving an automobile wanted to play audio off of a neil young cd he had just purchased but only at that point realized he had somehow bought a neil diamond cd instead and rather than returning it to the store for a refund or exchange he simply threw it out the window.
I also was particularly afraid of owlbears a long time ago.

Not CAVEbears, which use 80% of the same graphic tiles, have more hit points and do more damage and don’t have comma young versions that are easier to beat, but ALSO don’t have huge insect eyes and owl beaks of no practical value above standard bear facial features.

the authority can’t be THAT good if “unusual” is the best adjective it could muster. An unusual bear would be green or wear a silly hat! it would NOT have a beak!
and it is funny to consider that they are only 40 pixels tall since the first person view ends up filling most of the screen with a text descriptions of stuff the game isn’t prepared to show. Monsters also float around in space instead of standing on the ground, which has the unsettling effect of making them MORE scary. They are like foam dinosaurs in a bathtub. Which yes indeed at one point of my life i was legitimately terrified of inadvertently touching. I like that as scary as the tiny bouncing owlbears young were they could not touch me. That was an adequately immersive experience. Although this now reminds me that i had to stop playing Puggsley’s Scavenger Hunt because it creeped me out so much to see the float-bobbing rubber ducks hit a wall and abruptly reverse and start float bobbing in the opposite direction without being animated to turn around even though video game monsters have been doing that for most of their lives. Similarly with the leaves in the tree level of Prehistorik Man, even though they work much the same way as the raccoon leafs in super mario bros 3, i guess because they are larger and keep getting tossed back up instead of falling off the screen. borf i should not write this sort of thing at 3am now i won’t be able to sleep, thinking about those creepy self-mirroring leaves and ducks that apparently remembering being afraid of foam dinosaurs that bouncing owlbears remind me of remind me of.

the local spirit has its finger on the pulse of the art world despite being non-corporeal
although now i feel bad since i first posted this yesterday and haven’t seen the yellow character since the day before that but i presume i will again. generally i feel bad whatever happens.
this is actually the third edition of this picture and that one also. it appears that i did not make “normal” website entries for them because, like this one, it depends on an obnoxious social media sort of context that this website isn’t and in 2018 and 2017 i must have had enough other things to post that i was comfortable skipping them. Last year i suddenly started seeing what could be described as PLUMBER BLUE JERKRABBIT but evidently that was not sudden enough to inspire a continuation of this impotent protest then, so there are definitely different tiers of it.
I forgot to change the “bed” line from 2017 even though I have a real bed instead of a pair of mattresses now. I cannot determine what the floor clutter was supposed to be, so attempting to update it to resemble the present clutter would be a waste of time as i am destined to not know what that is later either. otherwise this is a completely logical use of time yes
>i saw mid 1990s reader rabbit games for the first time recently and this is what came of that
the interface imitation is an afterthought and so the words do not work very well with it, if they work at all.
i was already too old for the original versions of reader rabbit that i was occasionally near during what legally qualified as school for me, so i missed out entirely on the later versions that actually had characters and animation. hence why i cannot read. however my “audience” tends to be 10-20 years younger than me and not necessarily aware of how young i amn’t

Initially I just wanted to draw the dumb mouse misbehaving,

ruining everyone else’s day while calling out “see me!” and i wondered what else was going on. oddly enough while within the target demographic i probably would not have. possibly i was smarter then than now.
With the book theme and the large amount of small, hostile words that dominate official government messaging, i pushed the drawing toward the specific act depicted.

maybe reader rabbit isn’t a fascist but i lack any attachment to the character so i do not mind implying nefarious things.

and ideally this will not lead to any real person meeting the fate reserved for rabble rousing revolutionaries

before leaving i would like to point out that in the old macintosh game i saw in the past, i was under the impression that reader rabbit worked in a mine, but apparently actually OWNed the mine and has acquired a luxuriant dwelling, which includes a custom-made carrot-themed toilet. the branding is appropriate since rabbits don’t actually eat carrots often so possibly if they did it would cause them indigestion and as I know from reading the historical case study Watership Down, rabbits also don’t have very good long term memory so a toilet like this might one them remember the association. That also explains why Reader Rabbit has been repeating first grade for two decades. The only question is why there is so much space between the toilet and the sink. i suppose that means you don’t need to worry about your toothbrushes if you neglect to close the lid before flushing but that is generally a good habit to get into regardless of space allocation.

comic page 4-7 ! not again, the 4-7 from last time is now 4-8. I didn’t like how this once aggressive creature suddenly seemed cowardly for no reason and also having fearsome deeds occur out of view seemed inconsistent with what i have done up to this point. beyond that since treco has only effectively intimidated lope so far, to have a creature that also tried to intimidate lope be victim of it requires that i show it. And i had to wonder what could possibly HAVE happened which would accomplish that? And I am not sure that THIS shows THAT, but it shows more than before this page existed whatever the case. maybe ponappa is less cowardly than bothered and confused. this also gets slightly more use out of an old character design that i hated to waste on an extremely brief appearance. it is still wasted but to a lesser degree

i saw this while shopping. i don’t know if it is the WORST marketing character i have ever seen but it is the worst one i can remember right at this moment. definitely, probably, the worst one that used to be bearable.

At least Queen Brahne in Final Fantasy 9 has a weird sort of elegance to go with the disproportionate eyes and mouth and the player is meant to be unsettled by this appearance and not in favor of what this character endorses.

even the soulless marketing website wanking out over this megabland packaging redesign struggles to be positive about the shodawful ai meme hellscape mascot change
admittedly i have never bought bit-o-honey but i was never bothered by its presence until now. i remember years and years ago honey nut cheeriors cereal having a bit-o-honey sample bar hidden inside the box somewhere because i don’t know why, and me and my older brother both desperately trying to claim it just because children are easily impressed and made greedy for flashy nonsense even though i didn’t even like honey nut cheerios themselves. The presentation of the box’s “prize” made me see it as desirable. If it looked like THIS i wouldn’t want to go near it. and maybe in that moment that would have been preferable since i don’t believe i actually got to have the thing.

part of the shill page’s point is that the rebranded product seeks a more “mature” audience but as an adult sized person i STILL don’t want to go near it and only did so in order to capture evidence of it. this appeal is “mature” in the sense that a child wouldn’t pretend something horrible was good simply out of spite for another party that they dislike for a stupid reason.
The product has changed ownership a few times and right now it is owned by the spangler candy company which also makes “necco wafers” and artificial-banana-flavored “circus peanuts” and they just want the world to be worse i suppose.
in fact i apparently mentioned bit o honey and necco wafers in the same statement when declaring which bad candy my niece did NOT get on halloween a few years ago, not even aware that they were by then on the same side and uglier than ever.
even the computer generated “whammies” from the 2002 todd newton version of Press Your Luck weren’t as corporately ugly as this because whammies were ugly to begin with.

though arguably the sterile set design is inferior to new bit-o-honey at least retaining bright red in its background. I can SEE the horribee in front of it whereas the bland whammy, bland set and bland todd tend to bland blend into each other.

i am impressed that disney-owned abc found something i would less like to meet than the deedles. and this also foreshadows old bit-o-honey being reintroduced in 2040 and hopefully I will have better things to do by then than write a web page about it.
may 7: i forgot that since i posted this a few minutes after midnight may 1 i should have the next post up today instead of tomorrow. whoopth.
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i sketched out the next pages and considered that i might need to insert another page before this one to explain why this pineapply creature is acting like that since it looks like there isn’t an organic way for that to be explained afterward without the lizard no longer being able to dopily smile about it
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page 7 of part 4 of this
this section may end up being less relevant even than usual since the imps’ position in time is out of synch with what needs to happen to them next.
this was posted later than i meant to because i was discussing with someone how funny ub iwerks’ name is.

I keep thinking about that bread, and it has occurred to me that the wimpy, crumbly skeletons in castlevania games, instead of throwing their bones at protagonists destined to shatter them in a single attack could try baking nutrient-free bread from the bones, and hiding that bread inside weak pieces of architecture and cause the heroes to bring about their own demises by absorbing it.
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spring must be here because the final halloween decoration came down.
actually that was a few days ago but the usb cords will only agree to transfer pictures off my dumb phone once every two weeks. which is still more frequently than anybody both notices and is willing to climb up to the flag pole this had been hanging off of at the same time.

i have also this day realized that what i thought was a casually discarded kitchen glove outside was actually a wrist and hand from the skeleton. i am accustomed to seeing other people’s bits of garbage and then removing them but since i didn’t know WHY somebody would drop a kitchen glove outside i thought it might have been intentionally placed so i didn’t touch it but after passing by it about 732 times I couldn’t think of a reason why somebody would have placed a glove there and also had not thought to ask any co-resident if they deliberately dropped a glove in the grass and decided it was worth investigating. now that i know what it is i naturally picked it up and dropped it in a wagon still full of leaves from months ago since I only briefly knew how to sew three years ago and don’t know if the rest of the skeleton was put away or disposed of once it was determined to be missing a piece. the arm came off, obviously, since skeletons lack the tendons that ordinarily connect their bones together.

I just want to stop this angry regal skeleton from laughing at me. I can’t be thinking about how things are spelled with that going on. go laugh at a dentist, weirdo.

i haven’t felt this intimidated since a mythical fire-spewing dinosaur quizzed me on nations that resemble footwear while i was plainly not dressed to ponder what gaijin barbarian nations are shaped like or that africa is actually a continent or even officially a separate land mass.

I presume zhang liao is addressing the skeleton. Alluding to the grinding of bones to make bread in 200ad 1500 years before the Jack-and-the-Beanstalk giant is just another example of how advanced chinese technology was compared to europe. unfortunately zhang liao was consequently also not aware that when bones actually were ground to make bread to avert starvation, nobody who ate it survived due the lack of nutritive content in bones and the difficulty of digesting them. Hopefully Mr. Zhang will add some raisins or at least fresh cartilage to the mix. It is rich in protein.

liu feng ought to be aware that even new bones will have the same problem, though they are effective plant fertilizer.

with that in mind i now know that “fertilizer factory” isn’t just a euphemism for laxative.

i was trying to avoid saying “bowel movement” but yes for that.
also this was addressed to somebody who has a legitimate psychological disorder that has also manifested as an eating disorder who obviously did not sign up for it. predatory capitalism is glorious.

shining farce: the lunacy of reprobate intervention
i mostly made and personalized this in 2015 for someone that i don’t think cared so i de-personalized it except for the parts that would seem functionally surreal if not removed
but then over thinking it was too sparse i crammed it full of details that are somehow both vague AND distracting. and that is what i have this week.
now that i have put it somewhere where it counts as essentially finalized, i cannot make sense of how the laser eye could shoot out the ground beneath someone without also shooting whoever fell following that happening with a blast of the same power level that was strong enough to destroy something strong enough to have supported whoever fell.

does anybody sincerely consider wheat thins “awesome?” the factory process through which the ingredients are formed into innumerable little squares and dumped into packages in set amounts, packages which are then sealed and boxed and distributed to markets around the world IS impressive but it is fairly standard in 2026. wheat thins are no more or less awesome than oreos or dinty moore beef stew or anything else with a TM on it.methods which can break down or effectively repurpose the mass amounts of plastic waste from the packaging would be more awesome and have less sodium. i wrote another “awesome” branding related gripe in 2014 and acknowledged i was by then outside the target demographic. What am i outside of now? it occurs to me that wheat thins are not a snack that kids generally request. maybe kids don’t even say “awesome” anymore. maybe awesome is following me as i age and applying itself to gradually more elderly-related things. maybe prostate examinations, sneezing so hard that you hurt yourself and tennis balls instead of wheels will be “awesome” by 2030. erectile dysfunction pills of course have been already for some time, ESPECIALLY if you start a garage band to perform songs about how you need those pills. can anything be AS awesome?

I have no recollection of what this was in the context of and i cannot imagine any way that it might be good. which is a pleasant change having that not be related to government policy.

ha ha eh I am ill this week. I could never have come up with that line about hurting myself sneezing without having just now done it.

i do not know what sort of chemical reaction would cause your body to turn to dust without harming your presumably flimsier clothing but it is far from the only science violation going on
now that my replacement computer is MOSTLY sorted out and not suffering like the previous one was i can perhaps get back to actually implementing some of these sprites and the programming for them and maybe even actual game areas for them to exist within. i really have no need to keep trying to think of new things to have monsters be doing when so much of what is already there is broken or incomplete.
but these are easier to make into website updates. otherwise i need to have something to say, and nothing stupid or worth complaining about happens anymore.
oh OH what’s THIS?

if kittens win do puppies get exiled? if puppies win do kittens need to become puppies? what are the stakes for this contest? Were the circumstances of this combat determined by a neutral party? Or is the point that war isn’t fair and is generally caused by an aggressor who simply wishes to destroy and steal property from a target they do not understand, and do not want to understand, since greater understanding may complicate the perceived morality of depriving another person whom you invented a reason to condemn to death in order to enrich yourself, even when you are already adequately enriched? this seems rather heavy a topic for an ostensibly child-directed company like scholastic

battery? this guy? he looks like he has negative muscle mass. he looks like a vampire who drinks V8. he looks like a melting onion. he looks like an Xbox npc
he looks like goth peter pan. he looks like eddie munster on heroin. he looks like a tim burton protagonist. he looks like whoever michael jackson was trying to look like. he looks like bulimic danhausen
he looks like my older brother before getting glasses
he looks like a scarecrow hairdresser. he looks like angsty chris kattan. he looks like a tetsuya nomura placeholder character. he looks like he would do anything for love but won’t do that.
he looks like a robert palmer dancer

i don’t have sympathy for mysogonistic twerps whose only accomplishment is having a y chromosome, especially ones who encourage followers to smash their jaw bones with hammers in order to achieve a more arbitrarily desirable appearance. someone who looks like a pimp from ferngully, who looks like a mannequin at sears, who looks like tiramisu, someone who looks like someone shia labeouf grew a beard to avoid being mistaken for has no business telling others to maim themselves so they can look more like him

I don’t think anybody has actually DONE this, despite probably single digit instances of people like THAT suggesting it being picked up and massively reported as if it was advice that anyone followed, but he seems like enough of a sociopath that he wouldn’t discourage anyone from doing it. He has also encouraged fans to believe he murdered a pedestrian with his automobile, and nothing about his aura indicates this is some sort of satire on malicious social media personalities. he doesn’t even have defenders who try to claim it is satire like Alex Jones dones. He gets attention, presumably money, for being a sullen weirdo, and has not been given an incentive to stop nor life experience that would allow him to develop his own incentive to stop. There are several millenia of morons doing stupid things because they think god will protect or reward them (and indeed filling military-directing positions in several, if not all world governments), and now just the allure of “views” is enough to make them kill themselves eating spicy tortilla chips or detergent pods, so no rumored lethal fad is too implausible to be real, even if it isn’t real yet.

which makes it more real than this gaslighting and momentarily quite confusing before I realized it was fake advertisement twitch sent to my email in January despite me hating streams –in fact by January having a computer not stable enough for me watch streams even if i wanted to– and never using their chat boxes. even if it was real, and indeed people i don’t actually know tend to be the most sure of their expertise regarding what i “would love,” they are also consistently mistaken so I wouldn’t want to see whatever this hypothetically would be about anyway except to declare it foolish and invalid.

an extremely ugly drawing of the beaver-type mascot of the buc-ee’s convenience store+gas station chain holding forth a plush doll of itself and spraying blood on the ground out of a gasoline pump while declaring “Everything’s fine! Keep on buying crap!” the background attempts to show oil fields wastefully flaring off but also tomahawk missiles flying past but ALSO a construction vehicle pushing extra buc-ee’s figures into a landfill and these should probably have been several separate drawings
if this picture is a completely ineffectual and unclear protest at least you get to see a gross cartoon beaver, assuming you are into that sort of thing, which i probably would not draw otherwise
in fat this is better liked than my usual posts and considerably better liked than my usual gripey posts and i largely attribute that to the gross cartoon beaver but as long as viewers don’t contact me directly under the impression that i get off to gross cartoon beavers despite a quarter century of internet evidence that i don’t i will take what i can get.
I have heard only nice things about “buc-ee’s” from a frequent patron of that but he also tends to pretend-joke-like “normal” bits of america which we both understand to actually be horrible, but it disturbs me that a chain of combination world’s largest gas station and worthless souvenir store is somehow expanding when the natural results of this sort of consumerism on the world are only becoming more obvious, unpleasant and lethal, never even mind those to whom this was always lethal through a century of toiling in factories and sweatshops for little to no money in order to make trashy low cost american goods that probably get thrown out within a week of being purchased
Apart from that buc-ee’s incorporated is apparently extremely litigious against other convenience store chains with similar names or mascot logos despite it only being called “buc-ee’s” rather than “bucky’s” to begin with in order avoid being charged with copyright infringement by whoever owns the Ipana toothpaste mascot “Bucky Beaver” after which buc-ee’s is in fact named and the mascot more than casually resembles, via the founder being compared to the character as a child, and this apparently isn’t even an obscure fact. Just nobody asks “hey why is there a hyphen instead of a K and then two Es instead of a Y?” Buc-ee’s has also sued to keep a convenience store chain actually called “Bucky’s” but which lacks mascot signage out of texas. Granted I don’t have much faith in the integrity of a company that isn’t from Texas but wants to go into Texas but the point is that Buc-Ee’s is a sketch-ee business.

in fact when i tried to look up picture of the 1950s bucky now i found numerous pictures of other partially-dressed beaver characters also called bucky and some pictures of the buc-ee’s mascot from persons under the impression its name is simply “bucky” anyway even immediately after spelling the store name the official k-less way.


The most recurring compliment i see about buc-ee’s is that its bathrooms are clean. It’s bathrooms are SUPPOSED to be clean! I would be more impressed if their car fuel was clean. Not having human waste smeared on the walls should not be a difficult obstacle to overcome.

unless buc-ee’s is cheating out its competition for being secretly run by skeletons I am not impressed.

facebook’s unrequested AI scan got to the point this time. there is of course no alternative to submitting to an obnoxious ai-scan when posting images on a billionaire-owned platform. maybe it is training the machine on my drawings but generally this is training that will only sabotage the “work” of sleazebags who think they are entitled to have the computer illustrate projects for them.
doip having a problem.

i do not like to “kill” things but this may be even more gruesome a fate. eh it probably is not permanent.

a yet more gruesome fate would be me trying to draw that happening from 8 angles and i am not going to
yes that is all! After spending months on and off and off and off and off trying to alleviate this computer’s overheat issues i finally resigned me to buying a replacement which also turns out to be a multi-week process. Some ebay merchants don’t like to answer questions, but they don’t like to accept returns or present all pertinent information or use a consistent format for that information across their offerings, and the older i get, the more i have felt burned by bad purchases and the more annoying and particular my questions seem to get over cheaper and cheaper items.
but when i can’t make a routine grocery trip for less than $120 i do feel uninclined to drop that or double that or triple that on a computer unless i know the computer is going to do the job I want it to. or at least believe i can make the safest assumption possible that it might.
We had no idea how good we had it when cheap chicken was still around

now cheap chicken is branching out and has left us behind

Very poorly designed level. you should always have some foreground visuals rise high enough so the player cannot see or at least not notice the skybox texture going infinite as it meets the horizon

ah perfection
this screenshot is from 2011. i believe that area is broken right now and thus looks even worse than this

frustrating ai “art” posters at the destination, capone’s pizza bar in branford connecticut. Also SPORTS but i have had a few decades to become accustomed to being frustrated and disappointed by that.

I wonder why these people need two clocks if neither has the right amount of numbers but perhaps their unorthodox facial features complicate how they tell time. the structure in the distance is also questionable. The peculiar hanging scenery would be acceptible if an actual person had drawn this.

view of TERRIBLE high heeled shoes. they look more like pig hooves. i know some people who might be into that but i am not one of them and again this was not intentional

generic boring people in a bar but in what century i can’t tell. the woman looks like 1920s but the man on the right side looks like 1820s. maybe he was evicted from the old west after refusing a request to “draw, pardner,” since it is faster and easier to have the robot do that.
this poster’s artificiality is less obvious than the othe’s but the scattered vertical line shelf contents and leprosy fingers give it away. and once more an excessive number of inconsistent hanging lamps, one of which is inexplicably casting a shadow, for the size of the space

i suppose it is appropriate for a restaurant named after a racketeer. ALthough that is a rather creepy slogan. is the implication that smilin’ Al here was targeted and smeared because of how GOOD he was? The bullet mark clip art commemorates the Valentine’s Day massacre, after all. The insistence on the box that their ingredients are fresh is just casual information, not because organized crime regularly pays out bribes so that its regulation-cheating front businesses can pass inspections. Only the finest cigar ash on THESE pizzas.
And it isn’t the only restaurant i have seen with his name; there was another when i walked through boston for a really silly reason in 2016

Al Capone wants ME to pay tax?
What makes him special anyway? Why aren’t there any Ted Bundy or Ted Kaczynski restaurants? Jeffrey Dahmer is even known for his uncommon taste in food. although unfortunately jeffrey is a less respectable name these days than ted.

i of course refer to convicted child pornographer and Who’s Your Caddy star Jeffrey Jones not being asked to appear in the “Beetlejuice” sequel

what a miscarriage of justice. every citizen has the right to avoid exposure to Who’s Your Caddy.

I am surprised this didn’t come up when Clinton was recently subpoeneaed to testify about his partnerships with another Jeffrey. This alone should be all the proof you need that his judgement is not to be trusted, and there was already adequate proof before that.

i saw some racist-justifying dopesial media account try to claim that shoplifting causes “food deserts,” like “some of YOU people steal so the GOOD HONEST CORPORATIONS THAT NEVER EXPLOIT ANYONE have the RIGHT if not the OBLIGATION to not sell food to ANY of you.” but i am in southern connecticut, very much not a food desert –in fact i almost wish it was more of one so a kfc might appear within 30 miles–, and I have only seen more and more stix and snack brands infecting non-snacks on the shelves over the years. anything to replace food with extra packaging or additional ostensibly edible ingredients that aren’t food. and prices still go up and the store i go to most regularly is still set to close at the end of the year.

this never happened. lunchables predated disney in being so bad at remaking itself that people who pay and get paid to be idiots regard the old bad lunchables as classic and original rather than a corporate trashtardization of stuff that used to not belong to a brand and oh joy they’ll still SELL the old ones to you at full price praise the lard. Lunchables at least are cheap but consuming them as children is probably more likely to give you health issues as an adult. Unless we consider lifetime membership in a mediocrity cult as a health issue. *I* do but “we” generally don’t. presumably the writer who claims lunchables used to be good is an adult but i doubt that person will be believing it into old age assuming it is possible to live that long if you grew up eating lunchables.
what’s that? our fascist us government bombed iran and mostly killed civilians because israel told them to? yes of course they did. they hate brown people, women and queers. iran also hates women and queers and you’d think they could all bond over that but unfortunately pigment. nevermind the shared culture of god forbidding bacon and mandating stupid hats, your skin is just a slightly different shade so that’s that. hey did you know that Islam actually considers Jesus Christ as a prophet but Judaism doesn’t? Yeah but they probably mean dark-skinned short-haired Jesus so the pretend christians in america who consider empathy, forgiveness and charity to be sins needn’t bother themselves with it.

jesus shows us what greatness is by blocking supermarket aisles so we can’t get to the lunchables