oh ah ha this thing again because i spent too much of july drawing other people’s characters in an endeavor called “art fight” that is definitely made for younger people than me, which is most people these days, and yet it still was better than the last time I did it so i cannot reasonably expect it to improve
hm the head part does not move enough in the southeast angle and thus that carries over to its mirrored draw-over northwest angle. and possibly moves too much in the south/north angles. however, those two make it hardest to see movement on the slingshot so putting the motion elsewhere may be an effect distraction
the lemon would simply bop a target and then fall on the floor and be collectable for a largely worthless bonus that would thus not encourage players to stand around letting lemons get flung at them, similar to the pine cones that are already implemented. i am yet unsure if i really want a potted cactus to be the third object and if so how i would implement that and so the in-flight version is yet non-drawn
the large mist blast i thought might actually be too large and non-loopable to work so i made three smaller ones that perhaps can be deployed in groups and then stretched and faded out with internal functions. what a heap load of nonsense for one projectile from a silly creature that was only meant to be a mobile decoration at first
there! look! he is right there! Only part 1 but presumably his torso and legs are nearby
Just one week ago I posted a tiny picture of Hulk “can I stop paying Marvel royalties for my first name now?” Hogan on this website and today he is dead. Let that be a lesson for you: believing in omens, curses and general superstitions lead to delusions and terrible judgement.
once he finished lying to children that they could get success like his through legitimate means, he spent the rest of his life burning bridges, stepping on former friends, using clout to get his way, long past the point where there was any personal practical benefit to getting his way, and shilling for garbage, all stemming from his ability to pretend to be good at fighting weirdly back in the 1980s, and in the end the only people with anything nice to say about him are right wing wealthy (at least in this obituary which may be picking and choosing whom it quotes) and or oblivious scumbags and even they rarely have any point of reference from the 1990s or later.
Really he might as well have been dead 30 years ago. (presumably I am still talking about Hogan; thankfully Carrot Top has never been socially relevant). I can only be grateful he was never able to become US president, bare his full awfulness to the world and have the entertaining parts of his legacy become completely sickening in retrospect the way trump’s did
i saw this line in shining force 3 and could only imagine it being spoken in the same voice hogan used in No Holds Barred to say the same thing and that is still funny for me to think about.
and for years I believed this (since I only had a wav file) was from 1991’s Suburban Commando but it is actually from 1989’s No Holds Barred, again failing to supercede the 1980s True enough, the 3 ninjas hogan I posted last week was from 1997 but as noted it was also incredibly tiny and I don’t know a single dumb line of dialog from that nor have even mis-attributed one to it.
a bonus, I was looking for Hogan-related lines in my quotation file to use as the header here and saw this one but I liked my dumb little comment on it too much to post without context. I wonder who that product would even have been for; even by 2006 Hogan was over 50 years old and probably not considered a profoundly energetic figure and if he was it wasn’t from drinking branded bad dubious soda
anyway with this event the last surviving person who was allowed to call me “dude” is deceased so I can be much more emphatic in my requests to not be called that going forward.
this ought to do/undude it
just today (april 3, then i forgot i wrote this until july) i saw an electronic sign declaring “put the phone away or pay.” Meaning to not fiddle with a little mobile device while driving, which is a good idea; with all the vibration and divided attention, the operator should use a larger electronic tablet while driving instead. But this reminded me of “click it or ticket,”
from when the department of transportation was trying to raise seat belt usage, and rather than saying “you will be hassled by police and forced to pay money if you refuse to take basic safety measures in a motor vehicle” they said something less clear but that was cutesy and stupid. For as I declared back in 2008, I never do anything unless compelled by a grammatically questionable rhyming threat. But the declaration was in a mouse-over text tag so that message may not have been adequately emphasized, hence taking 17 years for the next great moving violation couplet to confirm that in fact the department of transportation also can’t issue an edict unless the command rhymes with the punishment for disobedience. so to help this proceed before 2042, i considered some new ones
stoplight or hoplite: it you fail to adequately respond to a red intersection light, ancient greek soldiers with gold helmets come out and poke you with lances
yield or garfield: disregarding a yield sign requires you to watch a garfield movie, and you won’t know which
buckle up or knuckle up: similar to the above but you know that you will have to specifically watch Three Ninjas: Knuckle Up.
Also don’t be confused since Garfield has only seen 3 Ninjas High Noon at Mega Mountain.
On account of that confusion it was proposed that rather than watching a specific 3 Ninjas film that violating parties be kidnapped by North Koreans same as Three Ninjas: Knuckle Up director Shin Sang-ok had been in the 1970s but that plot was considered too niche and implausible to have a sequel
litter or twitter: proposed but scrapped when it was determined that the people who still use twitter are the same ones who think human environmental abuse doesn’t actually damage it in any way
one-way or nunway: driving in the wrong direction on a single lane street will be require the violator to attend a fashion exhibition at a convent
meter or skeeter: failing to properly pay for a vehicle’s parking spot will imperil you to paint your skin blue, speak in a falsetto voice and honk anytime you approve of something. see also the civilian infraction Look both ways or Patti Mayonnaise
slow down or hoedown: those driving at speeds beyond the posted limit will be forced to wear overalls and take square dancing lessons, EVEN IF they already know how.
wiper or diaper: failure to maintain optimally functioning windshield-clearing equipment will be met by incontinence control devices tossed at your vehicle. If you manage to ignore that as well you risk being forced to wear a diaper. In the event you enjoy that your car will need to wear a diaper also. In the event you enjoy that as well then your life is probably difficult enough already.
you seem to be taking it well
moron the large trousered monster shown not long ago
I said before that i was not sure if this thing should be a monster or just a moving decoration but even as I said that, I was thinking about this.
This is a “organic” monster meaning it is not made of the same colored glop as dopes and therefore should not melt. however that does not mean it cannot fold up like a pile of towels.
durian seems like a good upgrade from lemon because durians are already covered in spikes and widely feared and regulated for their intense smell. But perhaps those are TOO dangerous for a low tier non-“boss” monster to have access to. To the player and also to other low-tier monsters that a dodging player could try to get hit by such a thing. The durian should explode into a damage cloud like the cleric flechette in hexen, something already particularly powerful (and dangerous) for the player and that can’t even be launched across a distance an unlimited number of times.
in fact that should hurt monsters but NOT the player since the player is a dope and I have years ago stated that the dope’s nose has no practical function and is only there to look stupid. But dopes might also be too stupid to realize that they can’t smell something unpleasant. Yes sure hurray problem averted. and maybe i can restrict what other monsters are damaged by it, or make them become more dangerous if they ARE damaged by it, to dis-incentivize the player trying to hit them with durian clouds on purpose. Or maybe accept that they have it coming if they are dumb enough to get tricked by a dope.
I started to draw a pineapple for a second variant but did not get far enough on any frames that it is worth showing. I thought that pineapple might be considered played out and expected from me. or maybe i just want to reserve it as an upgrade for a monster that attacks with pine cones. And so I switched to a potted cactus instead.
but THEN i thought that cactus is good to swing at an adversary in a close-up attack, and it seems wasteful to make two animations with the same item. But I haven’t started on drawing a close-up attack yet. not every monster needs one. this creature might just awkwardly try to hop out of the way to return to projectile distance. I have not drawn the projectiles yet either! ideally i will decide on the cactus’ fate before drawing one in flight because once I do draw that i will be reluctant to not use it.
I like the idea of pulling out a big clock for a near proximity attack but i ALSO have had for a while an idea for a minotaur-like monster that carries a grandfather clock as a multi-purpose weapon. then yesterday the name “minute-taur” struck me. which doesn’t mean i have to use that; letting puns control the flow of design leads to an idiotic product.
maybe i should change it to a lizard-person since lizards amuse me more and then it no longer has taurine-traits that make the pun “work” and seem like that came first, and 1994 Heretic already has a minotaur in it.
the escaping into the hat “death” i have a misgiving about since the hat looks like it should be collectible, especially by a dope that picks up/absorbs stupid things, but I want there to still be evidence that the monster had been there if the hat is collected. Maybe a lemon will appear underneath it. Functionally stupid! But there could perhaps randomly be a durian which will explode momentarily with an effect similar to the launched type. And then THAT can leave a lemon behind. The dope cannot pick up lemons. Or at least I have never seen one attempt to.
Initially I was making a picture picking on a stupid old sonic the hedge character named “hershey” for this setup. Although I think Mars makes better candy, they also seem mildly less concerned about child slavery in their supply line,while m&ms in particular are overpriced, and anyway this is a truly horrible character even without the dipwit patriotism advertising it appears in. I added confederate imagery based on the attitude alone but sure enough while hershey in a pennsylvania company, mars is headquartered in virginia. only as of 1984 but that certainly gives plenty of time to soak up local sentiment, considering how many racists are on the internet who were only born in 2009 or so.
a few years ago i saw a supermarket display that proclaimed something like “m&ms are for americans” and i wish i could find a picture that i probably took of it but i sure couldn’t find it for this website entry. o hwell.
I was reminded of it less than a month ago when I saw this package for sale…how DARE you put the stupid all american hat on this scumbag mascot when you know child slaves harvest your beans? It doesn’t matter how many.
I had hoped to get the drawing out by july 4, and didn’t quite do that but it is entirely possible that americans have bigger new bad stories in scumbag patriotism to worry about this independence day.
that character is SO awful. Aye dohKNOW, I never MYET the guy! awful
i hate the line “proud to be an american where at least i know i’m free.” the grammar is totally wrong and stupid. It doesn’t come across as a stylistic choice, just a stupid one, and is utterly uncalled out (that i could find, apart from http://www.amiright.com/names/bad-grammar/greenwoodlee.shtml) despite the song’s higher profile under the likes of trump, in line with other emperor’s new clothes elements of his political career. sure boss, as long as you codify persecution of alphabet people into law I’ll pretend you’re a genius even if absolutely everything gets worse for everyone who isn’t a billionaire but by a slightly lesser amount. It’s like nfts but for old and poor jerks instead of just the young rich ones.
It is also plausible that this creature simply does not know the correct words to the song, and there is no logical system whereby a person might assume the correct ones actually are since grammatically they aren’t.
I wouldn’t trust the horrid character change the line deliberately but ME using the word “where” here would imply that chocolate bean harvesting happens in the US, but if it did a lot more americans would know that children are being used for it and have long since prepared excuses for why that is good for them and better than free medical coverage.
ALTHOUGH my setup confounds the story a bit since while there are some legitimate 100% trafficked children doing the work, many of them “merely” toil on farms owned by their own families and aren’t necessarily being threatened with violence beyond what is inherent in hard labor done with massive maiming tools and the sort of encouragement and disciplining that might come from impoverished parents who would require their children to do that and probably had to do themselves as children. In america we only feed them fatty sugary poison made from the crops. It’s about time they had to WORK for it!