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Questionable artwork and pedantic miscellany
December 5, 2018
I seriously question your so-called “intelligence” by using statictics to “prove” that people who prefer one type of follower over another are “stoopid” (BTW, I spelled “stupid” wrong to make a point).

I do not know if this counts as progress but it seems worth[less] mentioning



What is WRONG with those things? They just want to follow me around, to CHASE me, and for WHAT? Just so they can do THAT? I want to KILL those things. Unfortunately i have not drawn new destruction frames for them yet and so can only get angry at them. What is especially infuriating is the red dopes: they will be OBSESSED with locating the player dope but then turn around, go into their STUPID dance and just FORGET they had a plan. I didn’t see any red dopes for a few minutes and then found them all staring at the same empty corner. what HORRIBLE dopes.



May 8, 2017
At a village-wide party where the Ewoks and Rebels celebrated their victory in the battle, Wicket danced and fraternized with R2-D2.[1]


A reminder to all you retcon-resenting star warfare enthusiasts out there


that George Lucas never got around to removing Sebastian Shaw from the 1997 comic book Star Wars: The Last Command issue 1


in which Princess Leia gives birth and looks like this.

Although on that note if I were force-sensitive I would be wary about doing anything near a window, knowing that a giant creepy judgmental ghost Yoda could be watching me at any time and that I would never be able to stop it or prove to anybody else that it happened. Hey, Yoda, Ben is a family friend but none of the people in there even KNOW you.


In fact I have been generally concerned about Yoda’s mental state recently.

All good? Great, I trust you.

Also, this is besides the point, but all it takes is another kid at school armed with a “va” to ruin Jaina’s life for several years. And Mr. Solo, do you NEED to wear your cowboy vest at ALL TIMES? Come on, I mean it’s the year 9-ABY already, get a new look.

Beside the point but I take issue with this comic book for exaggerating Mark Hamill’s acting skills


although I praise the depiction of his elegant fingers.



January 14, 2017
it’s time to clear the air when it comes to live dopplers in connecticut


an attempt to practice at a different art software, Clip Studio, which I acquired for a stupid reason and feel obligated to make use of. I could finish this drawing. Yes I absolutely could!

I still had to open up ye olde paint shopped proe 6 and use the mouse to clear up that which is there. I thought I had the PSP cd but I apparently only have Kid Pix, my original impossible to draw in except zoomed in really close since consumer art tablets did not exist back in 1994 software. I initially used it at the understaffed daycare for dumb kids that legally counted as “school” which I attended and then made my mother buy it for me after I got a home computer but eventually I had to concede that windows 3.1’s built-in and free pbrush.exe had more practical features with which to draw poorly using a mouse.
And I must say I have never gone through the hassle I did replacing my broken art tablets the past two years to get a replacement for my stupid old mouse, even if it is apparently highly controversial to sell me one without a keyboard.
For rather a few years I was curious about the likes of adope photoglop but never had a machine strong enough to run it well until 2009 or thereabouts. By the time I was decent at it, everybody I knew was trying to convince me I should use Sai or Manga Studio or flippindippin Gimp. I would ignore them at first but eventually see other people’s great results and think I was missing my chance to to do better, and then do far far worse trying. I may have to accept that I was correct all along in rejecting higher functioning software; I can only draw dumb stuff with dumb stuff!



June 10, 2016
I’d like to be entrancing, alluring, ravishing, like a stocking advertisement



How about this: I will treat this video like it is not incomplete and broken and that the story of its creation is straightforward and pleasant, and not let fully compiling my complaints about it delay and further complicate the matter. I am tired of dopes trying to control my life.



December 18, 2015
so this is the closest anyone could ever come to being on the real titanic.


I hope you will find this informative.

I contacted expert voiceover artist Gewk Gilkengramen for the narration. Gewk refused in disgust, so I had to bring in this bozo instead from off the street. With that in mind I have also provided moderately readable text that says for the most part the same things.

I will provide more painful details at an ideally hypothetical point in the future.



June 8, 2015
non-frozen balance energy snack in rod form


Flash does not seem to like my trails effect a whole lot. Which I could understand if were not so welcoming of dopes.



May 29, 2015
But what if they were not CAT eyes, but REPTILIAN eyes- Reptilian as in code for “Demons” as I’m sure that is historically what “they” been called.


The plant has good taste in choosing not to taste this, although it shows little regard for the ground.


I drew this about six years ago, assuming that was the same year I scanned it, and somebody (admittedly one of two people throughout all history to have portrayed Topaglior, the imp that dopes were improperly cloned from) suggested I animate it. Two years later I forgot about it for four years. Nonetheless it exists. I misunderstood the initial drawing, which is why the animated one is smiling instead of frowning but maybe it is proud of itself for having successfully eluded a dope.

I might use this as a production company logo for my videos if I imagine I have a production company and I ever make actual videos that are longer than this one, so to justify having a special identifying brand on them of this approximate length. I will hopefully know better than to put it at the start of the video. If somebody sees a dope survive right away it will put them in a bad mood for the rest of the day, plus immediate anxiety that the dope is free to wander through the video at some point.



December 7, 2014
Rare bird drops in for a visit


I can’t stair it any longer

another picture with stairs, but unlike sacre coward not based on a photograph (if you can tell).
It was initially meant to be a landscape, of a sort, but I drew it so slowly that some discourteous imps moved in and built a city, unfortunately. Yet later some of them boarded the stairs and hopefully will get what they deserve.

I am still not sure if the bird is nearer to the viewer or simply really large in comparison to the scale of its surroundings. Thankfully on my computer screen it is still too small to be a significant threat.



May 12, 2014
in spring we train real hawd, so we’ll look good on our baseball cawd

redrawn page 21 of that
One of my so-many problems is that I sometimes have a different idea of what I am trying to do than I did when I last looked at it, and then the NEXT time I remember something that I forgot on the previous occasion.
One of the reasons for the walls, I think now, is so that somebody visiting one house is not aware of the other houses, and how close they are. But somehow on numerous occasions I have made a neighboring house visible while a visitor is beside its front door. There is supposed to be a big hill and imperceptibly narrowing space so that visitors do not realize the road is a circle and the houses are all directly beside each other. In fact at one point I considered that maybe there is just ONE house but that was twice as unworkable as the present idea. I suppose it is like the old saying: you win some, you spend the rest of your life trying to recreate those circumstances and eventually give up in disgust at yourself and the world.

I dropped the “space” gag. In this situation this could be legitimately misconstrued as space travel occurring. Nobody has brought this up to me yet, but perhaps no one who would has yet gotten far enough with a fresh memory of this to wonder how elpse walked to the other planet that lope drove to. Also, following that with another view of the houses would be jarring regardless of how the gag was interpreted. However, I think this view is important. I am unsure why I left it out before, because I think even then it is what I meant for people to understand. At least by the first round of redraws I did. This may still fail to communicate what I meant it to, but now I will remember when I see it and stay on the same page with myself in the future. Unless I insert another one somewhere, which will increment the number.

This now offsets things by half a page, but pkzipfix suggested an additional elpse nemitz interlude to explain them better than I at present am explaining them in the future. I like them to be forgotten, or not known at all, and then to appear, and for readers to only realize later that they have been seen already, but maybe it is not as special as I think. This is hardly watchmin; my indestructible naked blue being is much more feared by the Russians.


Regardless, I have half a page to fill.

============================
an addendoy: the next part can be cramped into one page. It is lacking in visual detail or dialog so this should not be the problem I usually make it into. But where will the christmas duo go, then?



October 21, 2013
Fred is a wry and witty observer of life, finding funnybones and turning up smiles on three continents.


An older picture I recently altered to make prints of for a pumpkin-themed event


See if you can guess which table is mine

(hint: it is the one with the lamest merchandise that the least number of people are looking it)
I sold nothing, but I sold nothing at higher prices than I had ever sold nothing at before. Partially at the urging of the venue owner, and partially because for all my stabs at integrity it means nothing once I can blame something that feels like a lapse on someone else. It also means I now must keep that price consistent or else the people I showed the high price to will get angry when they see something less than that. Or they would if any had paid it.

Anyway, in addition to some free iced tea they were nice enough to let me have the featured artist space for January, (though the decision came prior to my recent performance) and I will have pictures on walls inside the restaurant, which will not have interaction with me as a condition to owning one. The scenario also is feasible that somebody may buy a picture just to get it OFF the wall so that food may be consumed more peacefully. I am intrigued to discover how I will mess this up.


This was an improvement on my last event, where there were mystery boxes dumped directly in front of my table which visitors used for sitting on while facing away from me and eventually for standing facing toward when all the boxes were taken. I would rather fail because of what I did than have nobody know I did anything. When that happens my goal becomes to make people know what I did, and I might not consider that I did something pathetic. After this week I feel like I have taken another step toward my ultimate goal of giving up. After all these months of distractions and setbacks it is nice to be making progress again.

Additionally, you may have become aware of the three for the moment unsightly link “buttons” now at the top of the main bimshwel page. If you had not then now you have, in a sense. One attempts to connect to whatever this is.
In the past i have given out “business” cards to people at events like these, but nothing ever comes of it because if anyone entered the website URL mentioned on the card, instead of art details they would see instead endless rambling about supermarkets and dumb things people do on the internet (such as write about it). Now they can find pictures, if they wait a few seconds for those awful “buttons” to load, and then they can see the pictures and think “yep, that’s the stuff I didn’t buy prints of today sold by that awkward weirdo who kept saying ‘hello’ out of forced habit but had no natural social inclinations beyond that. Gosh that was upsetting. Why did I take this card?”

I intend to make the awful buttons less awful, but I also intend to go running once in a while and eat pizza less often.
Ideally, the gallery’s rather default-looking setup is only temporary. Even so, it is rather nice for something free, I think. And unlike other free galleries, when something does not work it is not done deliberately as a ruse to try and sell me non-free version. It might be unethical for me to use something free as a means to make a profit, but I have not actually considered any way to use this for that purpose. I imagine I could send art-work through the mail. My imagination usually gets me into trouble.


Here is what my ridiculous imps would look like if I had business sense. More gimmicky, impossible to tell who drew them, and seemingly ripped off of other commercial properties. Is this an official spinoff of trolls or little ponies or care bears or an unrelated venture trying to chase the same buckwagon? People only relate to things that I do not relate to. They want to buy things that remind them of other things they have been ordered to buy. I would never buy one, and thus I am ill-equipped to make something that a buyer of these would buy.

Of course this display was gone the next time I came into the store and I have never encountered the name “zelfs” since nor had I prior to then (and I must be clear that I do not desire to), but that can also be desirable. If your soulless, derivative, cynical grab at money fails, you want everyone to have forgotten it by the time you make your next attempt at reminding people of stuff that worked. You might notice that is the opposite of my personal feeling, where I prefer to be remembered and to not remind anyone of anyone else. If I saw something that reminded me of me and it made money I would get mad, because then I would need to change me to seem like I wasn’t copying me.


It is common, on the art websites I use, for a participant to become infuriated at “art theft,” in which somebody tries to sell another person’s pictures and collect money for it. I don’t even matter enough for anyone to bother. I would probably doubt that if I heard it happened. If it was TRUE and it worked I would consider trying to take the perpetrator on as a business partner (an unbiased observer might advise that person to turn me down). The closest I came to “art theft” was when I taped a huge pencil drawing to a wall beside a door at the university while I went to retrieve some other things, and it fell off, and somebody picked it up and walked off with it because it looked like abandoned garbage rather than a legitimate finished project that the artist was trying to take home. When the person was persuaded by police intervention to give it back I almost felt bad. I felt like I had ruined several people’s days (not including mine). I wanted to thank the unidentified taker for wanting it. The party which I retrieved it from offered no comment on the quality. I might have let the person keep it but I had not scanned it yet and I needed to bring it back at the end of the semester for a grade anyhow (rubbish generally gets a better grade than nothing at all). Currently it is on a shelf smaller than itself behind me with other things stacked on it and probably no longer in displayable or theftworthy condition.



Nobody I know has a website anymore

Mr. Sr. Mxy
Nowhere
Titash
pc72
Pickford
Gilhodes (bah you need a facebook account to see)
video game music database
pacific novelty
Green Lantern Head Trauma

them`s fightin` woids: July 21, 2020
Frimpinheap sez:
Thank you for approving! I don’t like to compare this to an “alpha build”...
July 19, 2020
Charmlatan sez:
Well, I wish to report that the video worked well, it’s like any other alpha build video of...
July 5, 2020
Charmlatan sez:
Don’t worry about having cake, because unfortunately I had enough for both of us. Oh dear. Oh...
July 4, 2020
Frimpinheap sez:
once i gave the blue dope a specific reason to have an umbrella, I could no longer casually...
July 4, 2020
Charmlatan sez:
Ah, interesting. Perhaps the umbrella can come back as a secret weapon. Hope there’s more...
July 4, 2020
Frimpinheap sez:
one dope is much like another but that is correct. It carries an umbrella in the cartoonish...
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